Scotland’s oldest man dies aged 35

0
Tributes have been paid to Gregor McGregor, Scotland's oldest man who died today aged 35.  An angry man with an impenetrable accent told us, "It's...
Mo Farah

QUEEN defends herself from MUSLIM IMMIGRANT with SWORD

0
According to reports in the Daily Mail today the Queen has been forced to defend herself from a marauding Muslim immigrant with a sword. A...
Prince Harry

Prince Harry to marry woman he is barely related to

0
Prince Harry is breaking with Royal protocol by marrying an American actress he is barely related to. Kensington Palace are said to be disturbed  saying...

New royal baby to be called Mohammed and raised gender neutral

0
The Duchess of Sussex Megan Markle has today given birth to a healthy child after a quick labour. Prince Harry is reported as delighted, as...
Car Stuck in snow

Motorist who travelled during red weather alert furious car stuck on motorway for 15...

0
There were ugly scenes this morning after a motorist lost his temper having been stuck on a motorway in a major tailback for 15...

Woman doesn’t dick about with thermostat

A woman from Rochdale has taken the extraordinary decision to not dick about with the central heating thermostat. Barbara Dickinson responded to the fact that...
Scientists

Obvious Satire Still Confusing Idiots, Say Scientists 

Researchers at the esteemed Rochdale Community University have published a study today revealing that fool-proof satire is still not fool-proof.  "We gave some angry morons...

Jeremy Corbyn in Right Wing Political Correctness Storm

0
The political right, bigots, misogynists, anti-feminists and liars across the country united yesterday, to fully embrace political correctness, after the opposition leader was accused...
Heart Attack

What do you mean bride’s father pays? Asks Meghan Markle’s father before heart attack

0
It's been suggested that Meghan Markle's dad had a heart attack shortly after being told that the brides father should pay for his daughters...
Student Loans Company

Bloke from the Student Loans Company still thinks they’re getting their money back

0
A delusional representative of the Student Loans Company has said that he is still optimistic that they might get some of the money back...

Sun reporter accused of posing as human being to secure Grenfell Tower interview

3
A complaint is to be lodged after a Sun reporter allegedly attempted to secure an interview with a Grenfell Tower resident, by posing as...

Rupert Murdoch still on course to become Britain’s longest-serving Prime Minister

2
With only two days of campaigning left before the general election, polling suggests that Rupert Murdoch is still on course to become Britain’s longest-serving...
Boris Johnson

For Fuck’s Sake, sighs Britain

The entire United Kingdom muttered "for fuck's sake" in unision yesterday afternoon after learning that Boris Johnson has been "elected: new Conservative leader and...

Turkey escapes Christmas by identifying as a golden eagle.

0
A turkey on a Norfolk farm has been spared slaughter after claiming to identify as a majestic bird of prey. "Once I found a tin...
oldham

Fears grow for BBC Explorer missing in Oldham

0
The alarm was raised today after BBC documentary maker and explorer Professor Robert Falcon failed to emerge from Oldham after missing his rendezvous with...
Rochdale-missile-launch.jpg

Rochdale’s secret Nuclear Past REVEALED

0
Shock revelations have shaken Rochdale to its very core as documents from the cold war have been declassified, revealing that the 7 sisters were...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts