Queen denies ever having met Prince Andrew
Buckingham Palace has released a statement from the Queen denying that she has ever met Prince Andrew.
In the statement the Queen said, "I've never...
QUEEN defends herself from MUSLIM IMMIGRANT with SWORD
According to reports in the Daily Mail today the Queen has been forced to defend herself from a marauding Muslim immigrant with a sword.
A...
Muslim women swap burkas for Stig costumes to appeal to middle aged white men
A new experimental initiative has seen numerous British Muslim women swap their traditional full face veils for an outfit made popular by Top Gear's...
Britain’s oldest man, Paul Nuttall, has died.
Sir Paul Nuttall, VC, OBE, Ph.D, passed away peacefully in his sleep yesterday, hours before his 108th birthday.
Sir Paul was the first man to...
Britain surprised by arrival of snow for 8,000th year in a row
?Ever since the peninsula of Britain became the island of Britain, the inhabitants have been utterly unable to predict or cope with the cold...
Prince Harry arrested in Windsor for aggressive begging to pay for wedding
Windsor-- Following complaints of aggressive begging on the streets of Windsor today Prince Harry was among the vagrants swept up in a Thames Police...
Theresa May to Naked Mud Wrestle Nicola Sturgeon for the Right to Trigger Brexit
British Prime Minister Theresa May is to mud wrestle naked with Scottish nationalist leader Nicola Sturgeon for the right to trigger article 50 to take the...
Michael Gove themed garden gnomes to be stocked by Homebase
Domestic retail giant Homebase is rumoured to be about to bow to pressure from Michael Gove's employer, Rupert Murdoch, by stocking a series of...
People who ‘say it like it is’ invariably arseholes groundbreaking research concludes
Researchers at Rochdale Community University have concluded that people who "tell it like it is" are invariably complete arseholes.
"People who 'tell it like it...
James Hewitt ‘THRILLED’ at Prince Harry’s engagement to Megan Markle
James Hewitt has said he's 'thrilled' at the announcement of the engagement of Prince Harry to 'some sort from America'.
"Many people don't know this,...
Chris Grayling awards ferry contract to Nigerian Prince after receiving fortuitous email
Transport Secretary, Chris Grayling has announced that the Government have awarded a contract to provide ferries in the event of a no-deal Brexit.
Grayling, the...
Aliens Behind Trotskist Entryism, Claims Watson
Speaking from inside a tent made entirely of tinfoil, Deputy Leader of the The Labour Party told us that Aliens from the planet Luminx8-B...
Torquay becomes UK Hate Capital overnight
A new survey of social attitudes out earlier today has revealed that Torquay has turned into the Hate Capital of the UK overnight after...
In London you’re never more than 6ft from a Tory Party leadership candidate, study...
The old adage has it that we're never more than six feet away from a Conservative Party leadership candidate?
It's a saying that seems almost...
Ant McPartlin’s forehead to be used as theatre wheelchair ramp as part of community...
There was a much needed boost for disabled theatre lovers today, as a West End theatre confirmed they had secured the use of Ant...
Everybody who needs new kidney to get one as fair weather motorcyclists venture outside
The recent heat wave has meant that part-time riders and fair weather Valentino Rossi wannabes are venturing into the garage to wheel out their...
