Prince Harry gets job as Prince Harry look-alike
Prince Harry has a new job as a Prince Harry look-alike in Canada.
His new boss told us, "There's a lot of attention on Prince...
Druids “fecking knackered” after moving Stonehenge an hour forward
With the season now officially spring, clocks up and down the nations have been moved forward one hour to adjust to British Summer Time;...
Josef Fritzl gets Knighthood in New Years honours
Austrian incest enthusiast, Josef Fritzl has been awarded a Knighthood in the New Years honours list. The list, released today recognises a range of...
First Briton shocks Britain First
Researchers from London's natural history Museum have presented the results of analysis of DNA from 'Cheddar Man', Britain's oldest complete skeleton, prompting a spokesman...
Daily Mail demands children be taught anatomy using dead bodies of their teachers
The Daily Mail has today announced that school pupils in England should be taught anatomy using the dead bodies of their previously living teachers....
Vegetable that looks like Prince Charles discovered on Rochdale allotment
A Rochdale man has spoken to us about vegetable he has found that looks remarkably like Prince Charles.
Bill Board told us, "It was last...
Campaign to crowdfund a copy of Bravo Two Zero and box of tissues for...
A crowdfunding campaign set up to raise enough money for a copy of Bravo Two Zero and a man size box of tissues for...
Interflora agent admits to killing Lady Di in deathbed confession shock
Alleged deathbed confession implicates both floral delivery service and royal family in assassination plot
In a shock announcement that has been doing the rounds on...
Daily Mail photo editor awarded the Iron Cross
The chief photo editor for The Daily Mail has been awarded the Iron Cross this afternoon.
A spokesman for The Daily Mail said, "This award...
Scottish government urged to act as Edinburgh chip shop caught selling deep-fried HEROIN
Health campaigners in Scotland have urged the SNP government to take immediate action after an Edinburgh chip shop was found to be selling deep-fried...
?Britain First & UKIP oddly quiet about white family abusing student visa rules
Quite why the public aren't offended by the white, middle class family trying to buck the immigration system is baffling academics as anti-immigration campaigners...
Obvious Satire Still Confusing Idiots, Say Scientists
Researchers at the esteemed Rochdale Community University have published a study today revealing that fool-proof satire is still not fool-proof.
"We gave some angry morons...
Country that burns effigies of a Catholic annually upset by statue damage
A country that in the year of our Lord 2020 still thinks burning Catholics is a family friendly November evening out, is upset by...
It’s the will of the people – Jaguar Land Rover tells redundant employees
Jaguar Land Rover has told employees that by making them redundant they are carrying out the will of the British people.
Employee Bill Board told...
Teabag enters second month on little plate by kettle
A teabag is currently entering its second month of lying in state on a little plate by the kettle in the kitchen.
Barbara Dickinson of...
New British Sign Language gesture devised to mean ‘Daily Telegraph reader’.
Users of British Sign Language (BSL) have adopted an addition to their vocabulary.
This is a reaction to a front page article in the Daily...



















































