Rochdale man to drink 100 pints to help the N.H.S.

0
Rochdale resident Jim Tossking has announced that he hopes to raise £25m for the N.H.S. by supping 100 pints of bitter. A regular at Rochdale's...

Sock Finds Owner as Appeal Goes Viral

0
Derek Winstanley of Rochdale was today emotionally reunited with his sock after a heart-wrenching appeal went viral amongst bored middle-managers & housewives who wanted...

Rochdale’s Indian Youth Bemoan Lack of “English” Takeaways

0
Rochdale's Indian youth have complained that there is a distinct lack of  late night 'English' takeaway food available in the town. "You know what it's...

Shock as traces of vegetables found in supermarket ready meals

0
Food enthusiasts have demanded an enquiry after research showed that as many as 1 in 10 supermarket ready meals contain trace amounts of vegetables. A...

Rochdale man surprised he hasn’t “turned out okay”

0
Brian Bamford from Bamford got the shock news that "he hasn't turned out okay" after a neighbour called the police when she saw him...
Angry man, steam coming from ears

This drive is not for driving

0
Your neighbour has confirmed he won’t be parking his car in his drive. He believes that the role of his drive is to provide an...

Rochdale tourists furious as they’re falsely sold ‘Zombie Experience’

0
We were furious - Clive Gulliver told us. Clive Gulliver and his wife Amanda were visiting the historic town as there was no where...

People nobody has heard of resign from party that no longer has purpose

UKIP, the party whose sole purpose was to foster the UK public to vote to leave the EU- which happened despite them- is apparently...

In wake of America and North Korea tensions Rochdale man hoarding bottlecaps

0
Concerns have been raised by the family of Jim Watson, 24, of Heywood after he hasn't been seen for the last week and a...
Trump Flag

I’ve just made a life size jelly of Donald Trump, I fear I may...

17
“You have to send help.” Dr Thump implored the emergency operator. “If this jelly gets out of my fridge there is no telling what it will do. It might start a nuclear war or worse.”

Black death condemned for being racist

0
Traditional remedies, like bleeding and mercury, have proved ineffective. Complementary therapists have suggested vaccination, but have been dismissed by mothers who prefer their infants to die naturally rather than to become autistic church goers.

Gay traffic lights turn pavements to mince

0
Transport for London have overstepped the mark by introducing gay traffic lights according to Rochdale father of two, Arthur Branesell. "Its outrageous! There's one with...

It’s a muffin say experts ending the debate once and for all

0
An argument over the name of a baked bread product that is traditionally cut in twain and filled with goodness like chips, bacon or...

Three in critical condition after tragic scone miss-pronunciation attack

0
Police have closed access to Battenburg street in Middleton today as the investigation into an altercation at the Middleton tea rooms has left three...
Newborn Baby

Baby carefully planning most inconvenient moment to shit himself

A newborn baby is deliberately planning the most inconvenient time to either shit himself or start screaming for no reason. Lancashire-born newborn dickhead Barry Dickinson...

Eager traffic tyrant issuing parking fines willy-nilly in the town

0
Disgruntled shopper Eileen McCarthy nipped into Poundland around lunchtime on Friday leaving her tartan bag on wheels parked up on the kerbside.  To her dismay...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts