Refugees

Local man furious no refugees coming to his village

0
A resident of East Lancashire village Potterby has said that he is furious that the government has ignored Potterby when allocating accommodation for Syrian...

The Beckhams ditch L.A for glorious Rochdale

0
Today the Herald can exclusively reveal the jaw dropping news that the world's biggest star, glamour model, fashion icon, tireless charity worker and one...

Norman Conquest renamed as nobody wanted a King Norman I

1
The Normans, with their cry of "Battle Means Battle!" defeated the English army, shooting an arrow into the eye of the English King Harold. Bet he didn't see that coming.

Local commuters in conversation horror near miss

0
One person was mortified and several others were left badly discomforted today after routine niceties at a bus stop almost ended in a conversation. The incident,...
Luxury goods shop

Local luxury goods firm goes bust

0
  High end retailer, Lewis Veeton Moway, has closed its doors for the last time, citing poor sales despite a massive promotional campaign. Rupert Cholmondley-Featherstonehaugh, the...
Tube Chat

Instead of ‘Tube Chat’ First busses Manchester introduce ‘Sod Off!’ badges 

0
While TFL farts about with Tube Chat badges angry commuters in the chatty northern city of Rochdale have been wearing them with some varying...

Fears for Missing Dog as owners reveal ‘he just wanted to know who’s a...

0
There are fears for the safety of a missing Rochdale Golden Retriever who is reportedly suffering an "existential crisis."
Old man smoking

Police find cannabis farm at Rochdale old folks home

0
Cannabis plants have been uncovered at 'Bright Horizons' home for the elderly, Kirkholt, this morning. Police describe the haul as a kick in the...

Manchester residents perform ceremony to bring rain back

0
Manchester residents are delighted that their rituals to the Rain God have worked and banished the burning eye that brings only searing skin pain. Dr...
Danczuk

Simon Danczuk wins Prestigious most Tory Tweet Award 2017 Le Chatte d’Or

18
Simon Danczuk has won the 2017 most Tory Tweet Award after taking to Twitter to complain about homeless beggars in Rochdale today.

Nation in shock as use finally found for Ed Miliband

The nation was in shock this afternoon after rumours began circulating that Ed Miliband had done something useful somewhere up North. "It can't be true."...

Rochdale’s Monthly Bin Collections Hailed Success

0
Rochdale’s Council have declared their bi-monthly bin collections a “massive success” and a “victory for recycling” by Labour Mayor Johnny Pork.
Rochdale paramedics

10 injured after multi trolley pile up in dash to newly opened til at...

0
Reports are coming in that there has been a serious collision at Middleton Lidl. So far emergency services have rescued 10 people, including an...

Local patriot spends £25,000 turning his head into a giant POPPY

0
With Remembrance Sunday just under two weeks away, a Rochdale man has made what he regards as the ultimate sacrifice in honour of our troops - by having his head...
Children At Christmas

Only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas, say children

0
Excitement at a Rochdale school is building after pupils discovered there are only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas. One teacher at the Robert Mugabe...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts