Anti-Vaxxer has very messy carpet
In an ironic twist that would give Alanis Morissette a run for her money, local Anti-Vaxx campaigner Tarquin O'Flerfer is reported to have a...
Man that failed GCSE Science now an expert in pediatrics
A Rochdale man who failed GCSE Science has revealed he's an expert on pediatrics and specializes in treatments for Pneumonia. Bill Board loudly announced...
Bearded men tagged in record number of “beard decoration” pictures
Bearded men around the country joined together in a collective shudder yesterday as they were tagged in yet more increasingly irritating, abysmal and completely...
Playground craze leads Burnley kids to discover deodorant
Hundreds of Burnley schoolchildren are now aware of the existence of deodorant thanks to the recent playground craze.
The craze involves spraying deodorant from a...
Dog awards Michelin star to cat litter tray
Rover Thomson, a five year old chocolate labrador from Newlyn, has awarded a Michelin star to the cat litter tray located in his family...
Man who only ever reads Jeremy Clarkson books outraged about Jane Austen appearing on...
A Rochdale man who only ever reads books written by Jeremy Clarkson has voiced his anger about Jane Austen appearing on the new £10...
Breakfast means breakfast as new café opens in Rochdale
The Breakfast Club Café offers a selection of options, including a Hard-Boiled Breakfast and a Red, White and Blue Breakfast.
We spoke to proprietors Frankie 'Chubz'...
EU kebab ban receives chilli reception in Burnley
The EU move to ban phosphates in donner kebabs has sent a shockwave through the British culinary world.
Keith Braithwaite, local restaurateur and winner of...
Rochdale Online to give Danczuk day off
In a miraculous change of heart Rochdale Online has decided to give the suspended MP Simon Danczuk a break. Editor Sandra Simonhater said "He...
Man who called neighbour Greg for eight years disappointed to learn he’s actually called...
Maximilian Fontwhistle has professed to being furious about wasting energy trying to be a good neighbour.
"For eight years my neighbour has been calling me Greg."...
Rochdale UKIP councillor demands best of three for Re-Referendum
Following the announcement that Labour leadership challenger Owen Smith has promised to hold a second referendum on Brexit if he topples Jeremy Corbyn in the upcoming...
3rd Day of Sunshine sees Hose Pipe Bans Across UK
As the heatwave currently hitting the UK enters its third day water companies across Britain have enforced hose pipe bans once again.
Despite months of...
Pretentious Burnley couple having a thanksgiving dinner can’t understand why nobody’s coming
A Rochdale family have been telling The Rochdale Herald how a Burnley couple have invited them to Thanksgiving dinner tonight.
Professor Frederick Seddon of Rochdale...
Stockport Town Centre awarded UNESCO World Heritage status
There were celebrations the length of Heaton Moor to Hazel Grove yesterday, as UNESCO officials announced Stockport Town Centre is to become a World...
Rochdale vale terrorised by 1% outlaw motorhome gangs
Rochdale is in the grips of an outlaw Caravaner gang; who are terrorising wild life, being a public nuisance and brawling with dog walkers...
Manchester residents perform ceremony to bring rain back
Manchester residents are delighted that their rituals to the Rain God have worked and banished the burning eye that brings only searing skin pain.
Dr...




















































