Playboy Bunnies surprised to find Hugh Hefner stiffer than usual
Notorious Bachelor and soft core pornographer Hugh Hefner was pronounced dead this morning at his home, the Playboy Mansion, Los Angeles.
Early reports indicate that...
Racism cured after white people put black face on their social media accounts
We are pleased to report that racial prejudice worldwide has been solved by white people blacking up their social media accounts. From your mum's...
I married him for rugged good looks and winning personality claims Melania Trump
Melania Trump has gone on the record to tell the world that she married Donald Trump not for his money but his rugged good looks, winning personality and his open minded views on immigration.
We tried democracy and Franco-ly it’s not for us, Spanish government tells voters
The Prime Minister of Spain has told voters that democracy isn't for them and it refuses to recognise the result of a referendum on...
Ethnic cleanliness next to Godliness according to the DUP
The DUP were apparently acknowledging today the new opportunities opening up to them, with some pleasure.
DUP spokesmuppet Seamus Allways said "This is orr moment...
Book criticising Trump to be boycotted by people who have never bought a book.
There is growing support among Republican voters for a nationwide boycott of the book 'Fire and Fury' which contains several damaging claims about President...
Modern Day Presidential latest euphemism for complete and utter numpty, say linguists
As Humpty Dumpty said, "When I use a word, it means whatever I want it to mean." Clearly in a world of self-reductible horseshit,...
Former military cadet fulfils lifelong ambition to visit Vietnam despite agonisingly debilitating bonespurs
A former military cadet has finally fulfilled his dream to visit Vietnam despite suffering from debilitating bonespurs.
The man, now in his seventies, is said...
Trump Fan Can Go – Scaramucci sacked as new White House Communications Director –...
He’s just a rich boy, didn’t give a fuck about anybody.
Easy come, easy go, we guess. In disappointing news for fans of the White...
Santa to be denied entry to U.K. under proposed points system
Santa is to be denied entry to the UK under the new points based immigration system.
A Home Office spokesman told us, "The system...
ISIS Propose Christmas Cease-Fire Kickabout
ISIS troops fighting around the city of Palmyra have suggested that hostilities be put aside for a few hours at Christmas for an informal game of football with opposing ground forces.
US celebrates after number of days so far this year overtakes number of mass...
Americans across America are celebrating the fact that for the first time since the invention of calendars there have been more days in the...
Trump to release fresh evidence that Obama shot JR
The so-called "President" of the United States has ordered the CIA release all of the files relating to the attempted assassination of Texan oil...
I don’t care what UK Ambassador thinks of me, says dickhead who won’t shut...
A giant man dayglo baby who won't stop whining about somebody who said some mean things about him has declared on Twitter that he...
Trump Invades Iraq
President Trump has declared war on Iraq after a five minute conversation with Tony Blair.
The former British PM, referred to by White House officials...
President of corrupt shithole country to meet President of Nigeria Muhammadu Buhari
Nigerian President Muhammadu Buhari will become the first leader from sub-Saharan Africa to be received by the President of the corrupt North American tin...


















































