It’s absolutely fine that the UK supplies Saudi Arabia with the weapons that they are using to murder Yemeni children, Theresa May has told critics, because we send a few quid, some blankets and a load of tents to the Yemenis that don’t actually die.

The Prime Minister, who like her Saudi counterpart has never actually been elected by the nation she runs, is visiting the country despite the fact that it’s a nation where women aren’t allowed to go out without a male in many circumstances, are considered their father’s property until they’re considered their husband’s, and can’t legally drive a car.

“The thing that you namby pamby pinko lefties don’t understand,” explained Sir Percy Poshington-Smythe III of Rochdale District Conservative Supporters Association, “is that whilst these things would be terrible if Saudi Arabia didn’t have lots of lovely, lovely, wonderful oil and money, they are our allies in the fight against terrorism. Especially if you pretend that their particular brand of Islam isn’t the basis of ISIL’s Caliphatism. It’s probably best not to ask why so many Jihadi types come from Saudi either.”

Mrs May also said that people shouldn’t be “sniping from the sidelines” on this and everything she does she does in the interests of Britain.

“Oh that’s alright then,” said a Yemeni man from a makeshift hospital tent, “That will be very reassuring to the more than 7,600 people that have been killed and the 42,000+ injured in the last two years.”

“Now if you’ll excuse me I need to get behind this table as somebody is literally sniping from the sidelines here.”

When the aeons of war left the gods dead and the universe decimated, a single duck rose from the ashes and stood for justice and freedom! It wasn't me, that duck, but we look quite bit alike.