Trump’s Wall to be Made Out of Thoughts and Prayers
The latest twist in the ongoing farcical shitshow that is the US President's attempt to build an completely pointless wall simply because he said...
Children excited it’s only three US defence secretaries until Christmas
Children all across America are giddy with excitement that it is now officially only three US defence secretaries until Christmas morning.
The news comes after...
Trump credited with restoring American faith in Bush
Donald Trump has been given credit for restoring America's faith in Bush.
One Bush expert told us, "10 years ago American faith in Bush was...
Trump tells California to use prostitute piss to put fires out
POTATUS has offered to use Government money to harvest the piss of some Russian prostitutes to douse the fires in California.
A spokesman said, "POTATUS...
Trump tells California, Cut down all the trees to prevent future forest fires
POTATUS has announced that if all the trees in California were cut down then there would be no forest fires.
POTATUS got the idea after...
Trump attends Paris Armistice commemoration after hearing there is a golf course nearby
POTATUS has attended an Armistice commemoration in Paris a day after demonstrating the sort of spirit that has earned him the nickname, Cadet Bone...
Trump tells CNN all future press conferences will be held in Saudi Embassy
POTATUS has announced that he will begin to give CNN press conferences in Saudi Embassies from now on.
The announcement comes as his administration complained...
Trump hails record amount of pussy to grab in the House of Representatives
Donald Trump has spoken of how great it is that there's now so much pussy to grab when he next visits the House of...
If All the Jews had died in the Holocaust then Saturday’s massacre wouldn’t have...
POTATUS, Donald Trump attended a memorial for the victims of the Tree of Life Synagogue shooting yesterday.
After publicly stating that people should come together...
Worst thing to happen in America today was my hair got wet, Trump tells...
The actual real life president of the United States of America told the Future Farmers of America Convention that the worst thing to happen...
Trump says he believes Melania’s explanation that she didn’t only marry him for his...
Donald Trump has said that he believes that Melania Trump married him for his rugged good looks, sublime conversation and attentive tenderness as a...
Donald Trump: DNA test finds ‘strong evidence’ of human DNA
US President Donald Trump has revealed that a DNA test shows "strong evidence" that he is distantly related to human beings.
He took the test...
All Homosexuals should be stoned, says Mike Pence
Vice President of the US, Mike Pence, has finally come out - with a statement that may shock many Republicans.
President Trump joked a year...
Kavanaugh to celebrate Supreme Court confirmation with White House keg party
Newly-appointed Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh will celebrate his confirmation later today by throwing a massive kegger at the White House, sources have confirmed.
Kavanaugh, whose nomination...
Trump nominates Bill Cosby for US Supreme Court
Bill Cosby has been elected to the US Supreme Court after being sentenced for sex assault.
Cosby, who today received a 10 year sentence for...
Carolinians told to evacuate to avoid category 4 Trump visit
Residents of the US State of Carolina have been warned to evacuate due to the threat of a category 4 visit from Donald Trump.
State Governor,...