Home Office confirms that new blue UK passports will be HALAL-CERTIFIED
The Home Office has confirmed that the United Kingdom's post-Brexit passport covers will be halal-certified.
The iconic Royal blue cover, which is due to be...
‘On The Buses’ Star In 70’s Sex Shocker
In light of the recent revelations surrounding the scandalous sexual exploits of certain Hollywood actors and some of our own MP’s, one of Britain’s...
Earth isn’t flat, cats would have pushed everything off edge by now if it...
Scientists around the World have finally conceded that the Earth is most probably not a completely flat disc after all.
Research conducted at the University...
Lovely Grandma catches racism after wiping bottom on Daily Mail
A lovely old grandma who contracted racism during a trip to Burnley last week is in a "serious condition" after being admitted to an...
Piers Morgan killed in chip pan fire
In breaking news Piers Morgan has burned to death in a devasting chip pan fire in a static caravan at Hollingsworth Lake Caravan Park
UK’s youngest Brexit voter has died aged seventy three
We met in a small cafe in Westminster. A reporter for the Rochdale Herald and Britain's youngest Brexit supporter. Shining another glass to make...
Dead mice brought in by cats to be declared part of household income in...
Cat-owners are now being asked to count any rodents or birds left on their doorstep as declarable earnings in their application for means-tested benefits,...
Mixed feelings for Tommy Robinson supporters as bloke called Ali puts England into semi...
Ruddy faced racists up and down the country are said to have mixed feelings about England getting through to the World Cup Semi Finals...
Druids “fecking knackered” after moving Stonehenge an hour forward
With the season now officially spring, clocks up and down the nations have been moved forward one hour to adjust to British Summer Time;...
Trump tells CNN all future press conferences will be held in Saudi Embassy
POTATUS has announced that he will begin to give CNN press conferences in Saudi Embassies from now on.
The announcement comes as his administration complained...
Rees-Mogg admits he took snuff at Debutante Ball
Prominent Conservative backbencher, Jacob Rees-Mogg has admitted to partaking in the eighteenth century pastime of inhaling ground tobacco, otherwise known as snuff.
The admission came...
Theresa May accused of muttering in parliament “fuck em, let em starve”
Theresa May was accused of muttering the words "fuck em, let em starve" in parliament on Wednesday.
May appeared to mutter the words during a...
RAF successfully destroy evidence of UK chemicals exports
Targeted strikes destroy invoices, with only minor collateral damage to Syrian accountants.
RAF Bomber Command confirmed the series of raids sanctioned by the May government...
Earl Grey tea is actually horrible, admit people who drink it
A woman from Rochdale has admitted that she doesn't really like Earl Grey tea because it tastes horrible.
Winifred Barbarella from Milnrow (35 and three...
David Davis replaced as Brexit negotiator by two short planks
The government announced this morning that Chief Brexit negotiator David Davis is to be replaced by two short planks.
It's believed the replacement of Mr....
Burnley schoolgirl goes whole term without getting pregnant
The leader of Burnley council has called for calm today, after it was revealed a Burnley schoolgirl went an entire term without becoming pregnant.
Eric...
