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The world famous entrepreneur and basketball star, Kim Jong Un, has today opened the first fish and chip shop in North Korea. The chippy, named Fission Chips, after the rogue state’s illegal nuclear weapons programme...

Local man Geoff Addy was out partying in Rochdale's premier night club, Kokos, on Saturday for his mate John Bullington's abortion party, when he was arrested for possession of the Class A drug cocaine. However...

We won, get over it! has become the new mantra of choice for racists, according to the results of a new survey published today. The phrase, which initially gained popularity following the Brexit vote in...

Leftist wheat-eater Jeremy Corbyn came under fire from his own back-benchers today, after being accused of making a girl cry, and not just any girl, but a vicar's daughter, of all people. The accusations that...

Rochdale is in the grips of an outlaw Caravaner gang; who are terrorising wild life, being a public nuisance and brawling with dog walkers over the use of picnic tables at the Hollingworth nature...

A Rochdale burglar who was killed whilst at work will receive a state funeral.  Councillor Tom Walsh said, "This man wasn't any old burgular. He was the People's Burgular and as such, it will be...

Since the early 1970s, the Trivial Piesuits factory has been a welcome source of employment, nourishment, and scent for Burnley residents. The squat factory unit, on the Heasandford Estate, has undoubtedly boosted house prices in...

Katie Hopkins is celebrating her racist and drug-free status tonight, it has been confirmed. Hopkins, 67, made a complaint to the Independent Press Standards Organisation following coverage of her disastrous trip to South Africa earlier...

Dads are said to be giddy with excitement at the news that it's only one more sleep until they can start their Christmas shopping. Dads around the country are thought to be considering thinking about...

Good Morning Britain producers made the controversial choice today of asking a divisive, opinionated, loud mouth to appear on their show. Piers Morgan was reportedly shocked by the request, as that's already his job. However,...

In a surprise move today London councillors have confirmed plans to demolish the home of 78 year old Mr Osborn-Brooks and in its place start construction of a memorial garden to the dead burglar,...

London-dwelling sanctimonious tax-avoider Bob Geldof has said he will return his Freedom of the City of Dublin. Geldof, a remarkably rich registered non-dom who pays very little tax whilst complaining about how countries treat their...

In a shock move Friday, a UK libel court has ordered that controversial Daily Mail colonist and professional bigot, Katie Hopkins be burned at the stake as a witch. Hopkins was in court facing an...

Lewis Hamilton has upset slums all over the world by comparing them to Stevenage. The five-time Formula 1 world champion made the faux pas while on stage losing the BBC Sports Personality of the Year...

Following the success of the reintroduction of beavers to Scotland, experts are planning to repeat the experiment with the rare and previously thought extinct Southern Train. Beavers, once natural to Great Britain, have successfully re-established...

Much loved star of children's literature, TV and films, Paddington Bear, has been arrested and deported to Peru, as part of a round up of unlikely literary immigrants to Britain. A spokesman for the Home Office Department...