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Mugwump? That hoofwanking spangletwat needs to stop spafftrumpeting says Corbyn

Earlier this morning Boris Johnson MP called Jeremy Corbyn a 'Mutton-headed Mugwump'. Full time buffoon and part time Foreign Secretary is known for his creative language certainly caused a stir, as hundreds of thousands of bemused people...
Trudeau

Trudeau Promises Canadian Citizens A Wall. ‘U.S. Will Pay’

Canadian Premier Justin Trudeau reacted to the news of Donald Trump's election as US President by announcing plans for a wall to be built along the US/Canadian border.  "While we are the most hospitable of...

Corbyn tells press conference if you strike me down I will become more powerful...

Following Theresa May's unsurprising announcement of a snap general election, Jeremy Corbyn has made a press statement. Stood in front of a dozen media representatives he said; "We at the Labour party are celebrating this news; half of...

Americans horrified to learn what the word ‘amendment’ means

As hillbillies, rednecks and evangelical Christian right wing crackpots celebrate the last thrashings of America's hold on reality with the nomination of Pinochet-a-like Donald Trump to the Republican Party presidential ticket, ground shaking revelations...

Paul Nuttall denies lying about surviving the sinking of the Titanic

UKIP leader and MEP Paul Nuttall Sunday issued a stern denial that he had lied about surviving the sinking of the Titanic on April 12th 1914. Confirming that he wasn't actually born until November 1976,...
Theresa may

Winning a general election easier than taking benefits from orphans says woman who took...

Like the irritating eager new guy at work, dark Sith Lord and unelected PM, Theresa May, announced a snap general election 15 minutes before she was supposed to at 11:00am, pissing everyone right off. Surrounded...

You fucking asked for it vindictive Remain campaigner tells public after triggering Article 50

Theresa May has told the British public that "you fucking asked for it" at a press conference after formally triggering the process to leave the EU. "This is a stupid idea, I know it, you...

Nigel Farage to become the fourth Mrs. Donald Trump

The ‘Special Relationship’ between the United States and Britain is likely to get a lot stronger thanks to the efforts of Nigel Farage. He is to become the fourth Mrs. Donald Trump.

Yeovil MP threatens local Mum with legal action over Facebook page

Fop haired twat and Yeovil MP Marcus "doesn't respond to emails" Fysh has become embroiled in a freedom of speech row on Twitter and Facebook. Mr Fysh MP, who owns a computer and apparently a...
Theresa may

Deselecting MPs implicated in electoral fraud before election “Hadn’t occurred to me” claims PM

The Prime Minister claims the possible loss of up to twenty MPs from a working majority of seventeen in the run-up to Brexit is “absolutely not a factor” in her decision to circumvent the...
Quantum Leap

Dr Samuel Beckett stuck in 2016 after failing to ‘put right what once went...

In the mid 1990's Physicist Dr Samuel Beckett blazed a trail by stepping into his Quantum Leap accelerator and vanishing. In actual fact he woke to find himself trapped in the past, facing mirror images that...

Britain First’s Paul Golding to release prison memoir ‘My Struggul’

In tribute to the rabidly anti-Jewish fascist Adolf Hitler, the rabidly anti-Muslim fascist Paul Golding, former leader of Britain First, will be doing a sponsored spell in prison over the festive season. He'll be asking...

Government takes time off from covering up child abuse to tell people what kind...

The UK Government has taken time off from failing the victims of institutional child abuse and covering the tracks of high profile paedophiles to tell people what kind of pornography they're allowed to watch.
Furous Court

Man who voted for supremacy of British court furious about supremacy of British court

Brexit Campaigner Michael Gove was today looking for a new Court to be in charge of British Sovereignty as the one we have “seems to be no better than the last bunch”
Ferrero Roche

Nigel Farage spends £1,000 on Ferrero Rocher ‘just in case’

Far right stringless Thunderbird puppet and multi-millionaire Dulwich educated ex-banker and man of the people Nigel Farage reportedly bought the middle class toffees straight after the newly elected despot Donald J. Trump's controversial Tweet...

UKIP elects Diane James leader

Diane James was elected the leader of UKIP yesterday and has already been causing controversy on account of not being Nigel Farage. People outside of UKIP greeted the news with cries of "who?" and "whatever".

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