Dianne Abbott’s ex-husband confirms she often gets headaches
Dianne Abbott's ex-husband has put to bed rumours that Dianne was merely pulling a sicky to avoid casting her vote for Article 50 by...
Citizen’s arrest powers updated to include summary execution
Put your hands on the car and get ready to die.
Home Secretary Amber Rudd confirmed today that the Police and Criminal Evidence Act (PACE)...
Owen Smith thrilled with shiny new campaign bus
Owen Smith is said to be delighted with his shiny new campaign bus.
"It's brilliant!" he sang. "It shits all over Corbyn's campaign bike"
Smith drew...
Khan To Rebuild Wall
Sadiq Khan, flanked by millions of people of various ethnic backgrounds who by and large couldn't give a flying shit where each other is...
Poll reveals public wants good old fashioned political sex scandal
A Herald survey reveals that public perception of politicians lean towards disappointment at them not having any juicy sex scandals anymore.
Carried out at the...
Whitehaven and Cumbria to Leave UK Launch of Cumbria Independence Party CUMFUK
Emboldened by her landslide victory in the Copeland By-Election, new MP Trudy Harrison has announced that she is leaving the Conservative Party to campaign...
We either hunt foxes or your children says Theresa May
With the Conservatives promising a return of hunting foxes all over the nation face having to run from a vicious pack of slobbering, howling posh twats...
Private rail company owner and Blairite totally unbiased about Traingate
Lord Sir Baron Richard Branson said today that claims that he has it in for rail nationalisation enthusiast Jeremy Corbyn are unfounded.
The gazillionaire, famous...
Rishi Sunak to announce 80% wages to be replaced by a free bike
The Chancellor of the Exchequer is set to announce that the job retention scheme, which sees those workers furloughed by their employer receive 80%...
Momentum Youth Wing nothing like Hitler Youth, insist Momentum
The new Momentum Youth Wing that has been proposed will be nothing like the Hitler Youth Momentum and Corbyn are insisting.
"Well obviously they're nothing...
Great repeal bill to herald the return of Spangles
The government's planned "Great Repeal Bill" to change 44 years worth of EU legislation into British law is slated to help turn the clock...
Trump and Putin fail to beat each other in two hour long rock, paper,...
Presidents Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin met face to face for the first time in public yesterday and went for each other in a...
Labour only six racial slurs from power spin doctors tell agitators
Following the suspension of the MP for Devon Anne Marie Morris from the Conservative Party for her "n@£$er in the woodpile" gaffe at London's...
Gove is still bonkers, say experts
Michael Gove decided to stand up for those whose lack of self awareness is pathological today.
Theresa May to meet voters to tell them to fuck off in person
The results are in and Theresa May is to remain Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, sort of, probably for a bit at least...
Herald Guide to Parties Brexit Position
As the General Distraction looms ever closer, more and more people are wondering where the various parties stand on the issue of Brexit.
So we...
