DWP declared May’s vocal cords fit for work
The budget statistics for the Department for Work and Pensions can often hide the raw human stories of the effects of poverty and joblessness.
In...
Tommy Robinson claims full English ruined by brown sauce
Hate preacher Thomas “Tommy” Robinson (not his real name) has become terribly distraught at the presence of brown sauce in traditional English cafes. ...
Rochdale man jumps off cliff and blames friends not believing he could fly for...
A Rochdale man who sustained life threatening injuries after he jumped off Beachy Head has blamed his injuries on his friends not believing he...
BBC warns reporters against mispronouncing Leadsom as loathsome
The BBC's all powerful pronunciation department Tuesday issued a red letter warning to reporters over mispronouncing the surname of Leader of the House of...
Jeremy Corbyn found alive and well and working in B&Q
Jeremy Corbyn has been found alive and well and working in a branch of B&Q. The DIY store is well known for its positive...
Le Pen assures voters that despite National Front name change they are still massive...
In a bid to allay concerns that the name change from National Front to National Rally will dilute the purity of the party, Marine...
Labour MPs win right for toilet break during final vote on Brexit deal
After a tense round of debating in the house of commons Labour MPs succeeded in forcing through an amendment to the Brexit bill which...
Gove is still bonkers, say experts
Michael Gove decided to stand up for those whose lack of self awareness is pathological today.
Brexit Party Manifesto a Wetherspoon’s menu with curry crossed out with crayon
The Brexit Party has finally unveiled their much anticipated election manifesto ahead of the EU elections.
To much fanfare the document has been revealed to...
Corbyn reveals election strategy, if I ignore it it’ll get better
As Theresa May surprised the country by announcing a snap election supposed Leader of the Opposition Jeremy Corbyn was nowhere to be found.
Only hours later ...
Twitter scientists confirm discovery of human parrot hybrid that only speaks Tory
The BBC’s most insightful political journalist has been discovered to be a species of parrot and awarded a delightful new name today by natural...
It’s not a popularity contest, really unpopular MP tells voters
An extremely unpopular MP has just informed voters that the upcoming general election is not a popularity contest.
The MP addressed the crowd and urged...
May To Choose Baby To Kiss During Campaign By Enforced National Raffle
Downing Street announced today that all families in the U.K. which include one or more infants are to be issued with a special raffle...
Prime Minister Hospitalised After Strong and Stable Seizure
Prime Minister Theresa May was rushed to hospital this evening after suffering what is described as a "strong and stable" seizure.
The incident occurred while...
Argument for abortion makes argument against abortion
Underchinned Tory leadership hopeful Jacob Rees-Mogg has upset both women and homosexuals today by saying he is opposed to same-sex marriage and abortion under...
Treasury seek OAP to sit in baked beans to fund Social Services
In a surprise press release, the Treasury have today revealed a novel initiative to bolster funding for cash-starved Social Services.
In the statement, Chancellor of...
