Nigel Farage’s reveals apocalyptic Brexit plan involves moving to Germany

0
Nigel Farage MP (just kidding) has revealed a Brexit Armageddon plan that involves him relocating to Germany. It's understood that should Britain exit the...

Uncovered: The Secretive Unelected Group That Controls Our Future

1
The Rochdale Herald has uncovered a secretive, unelected group of conspirators who control the destiny of the UK.  The powerful group, known as 'The Electorate'...

Homes burning down better than house prices going down say Kensington Council

8
Kensington Council and owners of luxury apartments in the borough are distraught following the tragic fire at the Grenfell Tower Block last week. The council's...
Badgers

Badgers vote for cull of Conservative MPs

0
Radical badgers have declared Dingley Dell an independent sovereign state and have threatened violent action against Conservative MPs in response to the continuing cull. The...
God is love sign

Ethnic cleanliness next to Godliness according to the DUP

2
The DUP were apparently acknowledging today the new opportunities opening up to them, with some pleasure. DUP spokesmuppet Seamus Allways  said "This is orr moment...

Labour reports sophisticated cyberattack after Jeremy Corbyn’s MySpace account is hacked

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The Labour Party has announced that it has been the subject of a cyberattack today. A spokesman told us, "We first became aware of the...

Rochdale – Labour NEC “Can’t find its arse with both hands”

0
In the face of the least popular Tory Government since the Peterloo Massacre, Labour has decided not to bother being an opposition of any...

Dianne Abbott’s ex-husband confirms she often gets headaches

0
Dianne Abbott's ex-husband has put to bed rumours that Dianne was merely pulling a sicky to avoid casting her vote for Article 50 by...
Theresa May

Argos refuse to exchange or refund anymore Theresa May-bots

1
Shoppers in the UK were shocked by a press release this morning from popular retailer Argos, who state they will not exchange or refund...
Conservative Party

ISIS claim responsibility for Conservative Party Conference

29
The attackers wrote Boris’s jokes, Theresa May’s speech and arranged for all the letters to fall off the wall behind the Prime Minister during her main conference address in an audacious display of comic timing.
Guess Who

UKIP select new leader using Guess Who

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UKIP have announced their new leader having given the process over to the childrens game, Guess Who. UKIP member Cliff Edge said, "With dwindling membership...
Pork Scratchings

Relief as far-right mob turns out to be burst bag of pork scratchings

0
Police have attended an incident in Rochdale today after numerous concerned calls reported a far-right mob assembled in the town centre. Attending officers would like...

Tim Nice But Dim appointed UK Ambassador to the EU

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In a surprise move Theresa May has appointed Tim Nice But Dim UK Amabassador to the EU.

Famous Welshman will undergo treatment for addiction to public humiliation

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Owen Smith is not a man who flinches from an unnecessary challenge out of a risk of public humiliation. In fact, so ready is he...
Boris Johnson

Leave means Leave says Boris Johnson’s Girlfriend

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Boris Johnson's girlfriend has apparently told a befuddled Boris Johnson that leave means leave during a heated row at her flat in the early...

“Leave scientists” confused by spoon

3
Leave the EU scientists found themselves stumped this afternoon when faced with a spoon. They had previously been asked to identify a knife and a...

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