Westboro Baptist Churchgoers saddened by news that God actually hates FAQ’s
Congregation of famously homophobic church disheartened to learn that The Almighty is 'proper hacked off with being asked the same dumb shit over and...
Power Hungry Admins Have New Axe To Wield
With the advent of the all new ‘mute button’, passive, aggressive bitches everywhere are in their element.
We spoke to one such angry woman,...
Jury rules justified homicide after man murdered for drinking mug of tea without removing...
A jury has ruled justifiable homicide in the case of a man who was beaten to death on a train near Rochdale after several...
Trump Announces New Cabinet Appointments
Two new appointments have been made to the cabinet of President-Elect Donald Trump.
"Although I know that I will be technically the Commander-In-Chief, people will...
Morning-after pill still cheaper than taking kids to Spain during School Holidays insists Boots Chief...
High street chemist Boots have defied public pressure to reduce the price of their emergency contraceptive pill claiming it represents excellent value for money...
Farage to Play Farage in “Brexit the movie”
Spielberg declined to outline the full plot of "Brexit" but did confirm that it would involve a number of "dream sequences" in which Farage wrestles and kills a great white shark, unearths the ark of the covenant, liberates Auschwitz, clones dinosaurs and rescues an American soldier trapped behind German lines in world war two France.
Government re-brands NHS as Notional Health Service
The government has announced plans to re-brand the National Health Service as the Notional Health Service.
Jeremy Hunt MP, Secretary of State for Health, is...
There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson’s statistics
UK Statistics Authority have reaffirmed the old adage today that there are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson's use of...
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Wonga provide financial aid package as Britain’s credit rating reduced
Payday loan provider Wonga has announced today that it has offered to step in and help the government. The move follows a further reduction...
Prince Harry and Meghan to get holiday from going on holiday
The palace has revealed this morning that plans are in place to give the Duke and Duchess of Sussex a well deserved break from...
George Osborne admits he’s Banksy confessing “it was my first job”
Evening Standard Editor George Osborne is rightfully popular with recruitment specialists but few people are aware of his first job as famous, mysterious street...
Brexit Deal Threatens Iconic Rochdale Signpost
One of Rochdale's most iconic landmarks, the Welcome to Rochdale; Arsehole of Europe' signpost, has come under threat as Britain gears up for leaving...
Jeremy C*nt to sue BBC for repeatedly getting his name wrong
MP Jeremy C*nt has accused the BBC of deliberately getting his name wrong during broadcasts, in order to publicly belittle him.
The angry parliamentary member...
Star Wars fan admits films a bit shit really
Massive Star Wars fan Derek Ducaccus has admitted that the entire series on the whole is a "bit shit if he was being honest."...
Nationalisation doesn’t work, says firm making millions out of Privatisation
Business - Residents left worried by the collapse of Carillion and ensuing loss of local services have been given the news by local MP...
