Man who once burnt a Pot Noodle looking forward to another night of shouting...
A man whose cooking skills don't extend beyond pressing the 'start' button on his microwave is looking forward to another night of shouting at...
Rooney arrested crying into bottle of 20/20 wearing Man Utd pyjamas
My night of 20/20, Man Utd pyjamas and Steradent with mysterious brunette.
Everton striker Wayne Rooney has been charged with drink-driving offences in the...
Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal – 2,329 Gifts bought in four days
Four days ago we launched our Big Fat Secret Santa appeal with the wonderful guys and girls at NewsThump, Southend News Network, Angry People...
Journalist who faked own death to replace Andrew Lincoln on The Walking Dead
Russian journalist, Arkady Babchenko, who was believed to have been murdered has turned up alive and announced he will be replacing Andrew Lincoln in, The...
Bloke who knocked Ed Sheeran off bike given MBE for services to music industry
The man who ran over Ed Sheeran and broke his arm will receive an MBE in the new year’s honours list, it has been...
Lord Sauron announces IOC leadership bid
In a move heralded as a new, cleaner era for the International Olympics Committee Lord Sauron announced announced his candidacy for the presidency of...
Jeremy Corbyn announces plans to nationalise the Glastonbury Music Festival
Standing on the Pyramid stage at Glastonbury, Jeremy Corbyn had a Eureka moment.
"If all these bloody people can afford to come here at these...
London not centre of Universe say astronomers
In a shock announcement today, astronomers have come out and stated categorically that London is not the centre of the universe.
The BBC's face of...
Nationalisation doesn’t work, says firm making millions out of Privatisation
Business - Residents left worried by the collapse of Carillion and ensuing loss of local services have been given the news by local MP...
U2 Twatty Helps Unfunny Fatty
Following squeaking chubbalub unfunnyman James Corden's desperately misjudged and humourless attempts at making light of sexual assault, professional shortarsed twat and frontman of puzzlingy...
Spicer denies Flynn worked as National Security Advisor, Trump demands Flynn’s birth certificate
The Trump administration has attempted to erase any indication that Michael Flynn, a retired U.S. General and former National Security Advisor for the administration, worked in...
Man who received double hand transplant can’t wait to “trim his hedge”
The first person in the UK ever to have a double hand transplant has told The Rochdale Herald that he can't wait to get...
Magic mushroom season not as bad as rumoured
Rumours that this year's magic mushroom season has been a let down are made of regret and the memory of socks from Bolivia, says...
Diane Abbott quits shadow cabinet to be the new face of Soul Glo
Diane Abbott has shocked the nation by resigning from the shadow cabinet days before election week in order to be the new face of Soul...
Record complaints at Ofcom as latest episode of ‘Tits and Swords’ contains no tits
Switchboards at UK TV regulators Ofcom were jammed last night after the eagerly anticipated first episode of the new series of Game of Thrones...
Accusations of Racism Hit John Lewis Commercial
The new John Lewis advert, featuring a black British family giving their daughter a trampoline for Christmas has been denounced as racist.
"It's an...
