Priests to Discover What Celibacy Really Means – Say Experts
Following the historic announcement by Pope Francis that Priests are to be allowed to marry, experts are saying that Catholic Priests are, for the...
TV producer just can’t quite find the right Kraftwerk song for Tour De France...
Local TV producer and sound editor has expressed 'exasperation' in his struggle to find exactly the right song by seminal German synth pioneers to...
If one more person says Merry Birthday to me I’m going to lose my...
Everyone knows someone with a birthday around Christmas day. Those whose birthday falls on the big day itself are the worst off but spare...
Part time Internet liberals mistake disagreeing with stuff with being offended scientist proves
Researchers at the world famous Rochdale Community University published groundbreaking research this morning proving that most of the Facebook Liberal elite don't know their arses from their elbows.
Jocob Rees-Mogg insists women have absolute rights over bodies, except if they receive gift...
The fall-out from the Weinstein allegations of rape, sexual abuse and unwanted sexual advances continues to widen and include those in political life.
Whilst the...
Britain First unsure what comes Second
Britain First members were baffled this week when asked the unintentional riddle: “If Britain's first, what’s second?”
The question came from Billy Michaels, a seven...
Hammond to tour UK comedy circuit with budget routine
After recently testing his new material in Parliament, Chancellor Philip Hammond has decided to take his own brand of political comedy "on the road."
His...
Five Guys make creamy mess all over Nigel Farage
A fresian of excitement has gripped Newcastle over the last few days, with the news that Nigel Farage would be visiting. The Brexit Party...
Dead whale found in Thames was Russian spy
The Government have announced that a whale that has been found dead beside the River Thames was a Russian spy.
The whale was found beside...
Wise Men slam ‘unreasonable expectations’ as ‘Virgin’ Mary’s first sausage is a foot-long manger...
Some wise men have today hit back at a high street bakers claiming that their 'Foot-Long Sausage Roll' creates unrealistic expectations about baked goods....
Level 9 vegan stops eating anything that casts shadow
The scene, a shed on a barren windswept farm. The place, deep within West Yorkshire's infamous rhubarb triangle, the home of hidden suffering for...
Radiohead settle copyright spat over Remoaners’ moaning and whining
Radiohead have settled their claims that Remain voters have stolen all the moaning and whining directly from their back catalogue.
Immediately after bringing an end...
Hot Deals in Rochdale Black Friday Price Crash! – Don’t miss out!
Rochdale is going nuts this Friday with MEGA DEALS accross the town centre. Grab a bargain, they're giving it away.
LITERALLY!
-Head down to your local...
Sick Home Sec sacked?
Home Sec Diane Abbott has been off sick since cancelling her appearance on Woman's Hour yesterday but has she been sacked?
Jeremy Corbyn was giving...
Trump accused of damaging reputation of fat, racist golfers everywhere
Donald Trump has been asked to give up golf as he is tarnishing its reputation and attracting the wrong type of people into the...
Trump rushed to John Hopkins with severe burns
Donald Trump is said to be in a stable but critical condition this morning after being rushed to hospital suffering from self inflicted third...
