Theresa May’s plot to run the country foiled by Theresa May
Theresa May will face a cross party parliamentary committee this week, after it was revealed she foiled her own plot to successfully run the...
Boris Johnson to base Brexit negotiations on Pogs
Boris Johnson has revealed that the UK's Brexit negotiations will be based on Pogs.
The Foreign Secretary and Bertie Wooster of the Conservative Party told Robert Peston...
Britain begins cheap cocaine and animal abuse phase of lockdown easing
The Government has announced that horse racing can begin again from today.
A spokesman said, "From today people will be able to gather in groups...
Boris Johnson granted protected geographical status by EU just like a Jersey potato
The EU has announced this morning that it has listed Boris Johnson as a product of the United Kingdom with protected geographical status, just...
Only a good guy with a nuclear weapon can stop a bad guy with...
The only way to stop a bad guy with a nuclear weapon is a good guy with a nuclear weapon. That's according to the...
May announces bed sharing and brunch in effort to save NHS
The NHS is in crisis, dead bodies litter corridors and elderly people lie stranded, a trip hazard for nurses, and a health and safety...
Paul Nuttall Has Chuka Umunna Running Scared for South London Seat
Paul Nuttall gave an interview with a surprise this morning on the Today programme on BBC4.
Asked if he would satisfy the curiosity of literally...
Crossfitter reprimanded after failing to disclose he does Crossfit to stranger
Heavily trapped shoulders shrugged a sigh of relief today as justice was served to a rogue Crossfitter who failed to tell every single person...
Doctor of Medicine degree to be replaced with Google
A brainchild policy of Health Secretary, Jeremy Hunt, has been leaked from the Conservative General Election Manifesto.
The policy will outline plans to increase doctor numbers...
Gary Barlow wins 2017 Nobel Lit Prize
In news from the future today, we have learned that Gary 'Tory Tax Breaks' Barlow is/will be the winner of the 2017 Nobel Prize...
Michael Barrymore to present I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here
Michael Barrymore is to present the next series of, "I'm a celebrity, get me out of here".
The new series will see contestants head to...
Brexiters puzzled to find out what Parliamentary Sovereignty actually means
Theresa May has been left with a political bloody nose after she was unable to convince enough of her own party to swallow her...
Tories to abolish hospital parking charges by abolishing hospitals
The Tory Party has today promised to abolish hospital parking charges by abolishing hospitals.
Tory manifesto spokesman, Bill Board told us, "We've done our research...
Donald Trump commemorative jigsaws to have missing pieces by design
The White House has confirmed that the new range of Trump jigsaw puzzles, commemorating the President's achievements in office, are deliberately missing several pieces.
The...
Jacob Rees-Mogg named as Minister of Silly Walks
Jacob Rees-Mogg, famous for transforming the lives of the people of North-East Sunwontset, has been appointed Minister of Silly Walks.
It's believed Theresa May made...
Prime Minister not taking donations from millionaires for granted
The Tory spin doctors are especially busy this morning on the nation's airwaves ensuring everybody they are not taking yesterday's electoral results as a...
