Government reassures that Brexit talk delays are all part of the plan
Number 10 has today reassured the Rochdale Herald that everything is in good order and that they do, in fact, know what they are...
Simon Danczuk expected to volunteer as UKIP teenage pussy inspector
"Although I'm a Labour candidate, I'll throw my support behind UKIP and volunteer to inspect teenage girls vaginas." Said local full time pornography enthusiast...
FIFA rejects World Cup draw rigging allegations after Russia selected to play against Russia
FIFA have been forced to defend more allegations of corruption after the 2018 World Cup hosts, Russia, were selected to play against themselves in...
Burnley opens new “All you won’t eat” vegetarian restaurant
Burnley's first "All you won't eat" buffet style restaurant opened it's doors today.
The lavish 10 seater eaterie offers food that most locals would...
UK wakes up in shower and realises it was all a dream
Season 6 of the failing blockbuster drama Brexiting Bad has plumbed new depths of plotting.
Following episodes where lead character Boris Johnson got angry and...
Bake Off Champion Candice announces conversion to Islam
Candice Clay, winner of the 2016 Great British Bake off, has sensationally announced She is converting to Islam.
School sex education classes to be replaced by Love Island
School sex education classes are rubbish and should be replaced by episodes of Love Island it has been decided.
Justine Greening said, "Learning to draw...
Blairite Entryism Not A Big Deal, Insist Blairites
It was revealed today that a Blairite peer, a hedge fund manager, several rich business types and a Liberal Democrat Lord were behind the...
Herald Horrible Histories presents Pathetic Presidents
Episode 1 - Pathetic Presidents. The Terrible Trumps.
Welcome to the News at When. When? The 21st century, when one of America's presidents was a...
Dead refugees welcome say Home Office
Refugees will be welcome to Great Britain providing they are dead, under a new scheme announced by the Home Office.
The new measures, expected to...
Aaron Banks eaten by polar bear forced to migrate to Cheshire by global warming
Reports are coming in that a man ironically mauled to death by a polar bear in Northwich town centre was prominent leave voter and...
Idris Elba to play Mary Poppins in long awaited Disney remake
Idris Elba has been cast as Mary Poppins in the long awaited Disney remake of Mary Poppins.
Competition was fierce for the role with Jodie...
Significantly lower brain function can lead to heading footballs, scientists reveal
Scientists have revealed that significantly lower brain function can lead to being a footballer.
Researchers said they had identified "significantly lower levels of brain function"...
London prime ministerial fatberg is too strong and stable to shift
Following the news that a massive lump of fat, plastic and waste material is blocking London's sewer works, the Rochdale Herald spoke to an...
Fictional article published too soon after imaginary incident
A fictional article on a satirical site has been published too soon after an incident that didn't take place.
The latest scandal to grip the...
Young people should not be ignored says old man ignoring young people
Jeremy Corbyn sought to reconnect with young people today over Brexit by sacking the last of the Remainers in the Shadow Cabinet for suggesting...
