Rochdale man who’s never voted pledges to ‘bring down Torie scum’ by voting Green
Gareth Thundlestick from Scumsunk crescent, Rochdale, said he became politically active after ruining the suspension on his 1986 Ford Capri whilst negotiating a pothole too fast.
"That...
Brexit means Brexit, obviously, says Jeremy Corbyn
'Brexit means Brexit and we're going to make a success of it', Jeremy Corbyn will say this afternoon.
He will speak from the top of...
Theresa May pledges to not remain silent on pee in swimming pools
Prime Minister Theresa May has pledged to not remain silent on the growing problem of pee in swimming pools highlighted in a shock report...
Gove calls for post-Brexit legalisation of cannibalism
Former Tory minister and leading Brexit campaigner Michael Gove has called on the government to slash EU regulations on cannibalism which he claims have...
BBC Announce Sequel to ‘Bake Off’
Following the loss of ‘The Great British Bake Off’ to a rival commercial channel, the BBC have been struggling to come up with another...
Trump Press Secretary buys fireproof underpants
The secret of Press Secretary Sean Spicer's propensity for hyperbolic bullshitacity has been revealed.
He has reportedly been wearing a revolutionary new type of asbestos...
Labour, the Social DEMOCRATIC Party, takes more steps to prevent undesirables from voting
The National Executive Committee of the Labour Party has announced today that only those to the right of Tony Blair will be permitted to...
Corbyn supporters call for reselection of Copeland constituency
After Labour's marginal win in Stoke and devastating Loss in Copeland by elections, Left wing Labour supporters are calling for reselection of the constituency.
Speaking to disappointed...
Essex dog fears for future after hands-on meeting with Prime Minister
Essex - A black and white border collie from Sonning, Essex was reported to be safe in protective custody after being accosted by the...
Commie Corbyn pledges to nationalise your teeth
Bearded Trotskyite do-gooder, Jeremy Corbyn has taken a break from sending care packages full of homemade jam to terrorists, to nationalise absolutely everything.
Clueless commie...
Donald Trump fails to mention the length of his penis in speech defending western...
Donald Trump left an eager crowd shocked in Poland today when he failed to mention the length of his schlong once during a rousing...
Britons to get easy sex after Brexit as the whole world lines up to...
Good news on the prospects with Brexit this afternoon as news broke that the entire world is lining up to provide easy sex for...
Donald Trump to let Donald Trump fail now as it will be a lot...
Donald Trump has decided to extend his executive decision concerning repealing Obamacare to his entire presidency.
It is believed the most successful man ever to...
New UKIP leader having hypnotherapy to stop him saying “I’m not a racist, but”...
UKIP’s press officer Ms Gline Garafe reassured a nervous nation today but stating that UKIP’s new leader is undergoing hypnotherapy to stop him saying...
Herald Guide to Parties Brexit Position
As the General Distraction looms ever closer, more and more people are wondering where the various parties stand on the issue of Brexit.
So we...
NHS study shows people with two legs run greater risk of jogging injuries
People with two legs run a greater risk of suffering injuries while jogging or running, a new report published Friday by the NHS shows.
According...
