Daily Mail website wins ISIS award for services to Jihad
ISIS have awarded the Daily Mail website, MailOnline.com, its prestigious Jihadi Of The Year Award.
This is the first time the sought after prize, known...
Government announces above-inflation pay rise for vital frontline MPs
Chancellor Philip Hammond responds to calls to offer above-inflation pay rises to public sector workers in Westminster, after a survey revealed that four out...
We’re all going to die after Brexit, confirms Philip Hammond
Remain voters around the country are said to be absolutely furious to learn that every single person who voted to remain in the European...
Martin Roberts Demands Recount.
Property botherer and dreadful chef Martin Roberts has demanded a recount following his failure to be elected President of the Jungle in this year's...
Sneaky German declares Last Goal’s the Winner and takes ball home
Sneaky German and part-time Finn Nico Rosberg has pulled off the all-time-shittiest Schoolboy trick by declaring the last goal the winner as the ball was already in the net!
Samuel L Jackson to provide voiceover for Conservative DUP deal
The world of entertainment is buzzing with the rumour that Samuel L. Jackson is to provide the voiceover for the Conservative DUP agreement announced...
Jeremy Corbyn’s conference speech just him saying “Oh Jeremy Corbyn” for 1 hour
Jeremy Corbyn's conference speech has been rapturously received by conference delegates.
The speech consisted solely of Corbyn repeating the line, "Oh Jeremy Corbyn" for a...
Fears for safety of Strictly 2016 producers as AdB meets JCC
Strictly Come Dancing returned to our screens this evening in a whirlwind of glitz and glitter. Amongst the celebrities dancing for our pleasure over...
Toddlers appointed to lead Brexit negotiations
David Davis is to take a back seat in the upcoming Brexit negotiations, having decided that a two year old called Davis Davis from...
May May trigger Brexit in May? Maybe
Theresa May today revealed her plans and a slogan for Brexit; a bitter, lonely and incontinent future with seventeen cats and no continent.
The slogan...
Boy Scouts of America deny meeting Donald Trump
The Boy Scouts of America have issued a statement denying meeting Donald Trump.
“It never happened. It's fake news folks.” The statement begins.
“Only a sick,...
ISIS Second In Command Killed Again
The Daily Express has reported for the eighth time this month the death of so called Islamic State's second in command.
"He was killed by...
Kelvin Mackenzie is a bellend says South Yorkshire Police
South Yorkshire Police have taken the bold move to publicly call the former editor of the The Sun, Kelvin Mackenzie a "complete bellend" over...
Anarchists angered at police refusal to follow rules
A group of Rochdale anarchists have been telling the Herald about the treatment they received at the hands of the German police at the...
Britain First Demands Mornington Crescent Be Renamed Mornington Cross
“If they want to have religious symbol in the name, they should rename it Mornington Cross, a proper Christian symbol, much more British,” Golding said.
ISIS withdraw from Iraq after Blair’s return to politics announcement
Tony Blair yesterday announced that he intended to fill a massive hole and that after that he'd return to British politics.
In an interview he...
