Tories fined £20 million for pumping untreated sewage into people’s brains

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The Conservatives are facing a hefty fine after it has been discovered that their manifesto pledges and reassurances over Brexit were found to contain...
Shrugging Man

Who needs firemen anyway asks DUP clad Tory government

2
There was anger in parliament last night as the government narrowly defeated a motion by the Labour Party to end the cap on public...

Gap between rich and poor not an issue say rich bastards

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The massive gap between the poorest peoples' lot and the vomit-inducing wealth of the world's richest isn't really important, insist representatives for the world's...
British Homeopath

British Homeopathy Association to strike over watered down labelling

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The British Homeopathy Association has announced a planned strike over government plans to label their medication as being ‘useless’. The head of the British Homeopathic Association...
Cat's Eyes

The Sun wins top spot in nationwide industry poll

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Following recent scandals involving their journalists, inaccurate reporting and misinforming large sections of the population The Sun newspaper has had some positive feedback from...
Paramedics transporting Nigel Farage to the ambulance

Rochdale man thrown from office window

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A Rochdale man is in a critical condition after he was thrown out of the third floor window of his office kitchenette. Mr Dickinson (39...

Melania Trump reveals her favourite iPod Playlist

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In an exclusive interview with The Rochdale Herald the former Eastern European 'model' and wife of President Elect Donald Trump revealed her favourite iPod playlist.
Titanic

British shipping businesses not optimistic enough about massive iceberg heading for Atlantic say Brexit...

2
The Brexit lobby has claimed the trillion tonne iceberg heading for the Atlantic from Antarctica is a challenge to British shipping interests to put...

HS2 in doubt after MPs voice concern about providing an army of white walkers...

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Lord Chris Greyling, Secretary of State for Transport, revealed this afternoon that the government is considering changing its mind over HS2 out of health...
Hungry

Do I still get lunch asks hungry 6 year old

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In light of the slim Conservative majority, primary school children up and down the nation awake today uncertain of their future meal prospects. "Will I...
Surprised Santa

The Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal – 1,600 gifts bought in 48 hours

Two days ago we launched our Big Fat Secret Santa appeal with the wonderful guys and girls at NewsThump, Southend News Network, Angry People...

OJ Simpson appointed White House press secretary

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Tongues are wagging in Washington today over what seems too convenient for coincidence as OJ Simpson is rumoured about to be appointed as Sean...

Government reassures that Brexit talk delays are all part of the plan

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Number 10 has today reassured the Rochdale Herald that everything is in good order and that they do, in fact, know what they are...
Man Bun

Man buns proven to reduce transmission rates of sexually transmitted diseases

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The Rochdale Royal Institute of Sexual Health have released the results of a study demonstrating man buns as a proven way to reduce the...
Daily Mail Readers

Panic over as Daily Mail assures everyone the fridge wasn’t bought by a white...

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The Mail-online has sought to reassure readers that it was a slack-jawed, lazy, drunken black man who bought the fridge that started the Grenfell...

Cliff Richard still not a nonce confirms BBC

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Singer, God-botherer and long term bachelor for no particular reason is still not suspected of fiddling with young men, according to a BBC report. The...

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