Government announces all heroes to be paid in rounds of applause
Government announces all heroes to be paid in rounds of applause. The first decisive vote in the new session of parliament was passed yesterday...
Blairite Entryism Not A Big Deal, Insist Blairites
It was revealed today that a Blairite peer, a hedge fund manager, several rich business types and a Liberal Democrat Lord were behind the...
Buying a house is really stressful first time buyer tells bloke in queue for...
A first time buyer has been explaining how stressful buying a house is to a man he met in a foodbank.
Taylor Twyford-Twist was doing...
Terror in the skies Part 2
The editor of The Rochdale Herald was left horrified aboard a flight to Rhodes yesterday after reading an article in a copy of The Telegraph...
Six year old girl fears poisoning after finding new food mixed into her food
Six year old Sally Parker, domestic overseer and student, has recoiled in horror fearing poisoning after the discovery of new food mixed into food...
Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs
Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets.
The move comes after...
Television viewers shocked to discover drama series that doesn’t involve paedophiles
Viewers of a new TV drama series have spoken of their shock at discovering that it didn't involve paedophillia at any point.
Departure, a new...
Twats on train don’t know they’re twats
A large group of noisy twats on a train from London to Yorkshire are apparently unaware that they are all colossal twats.
The group, who...
Prue Leith reveals Hawking final theory
Prue Leith, the famous cook, presenter and writer was recorded by several bystanders shouting Stephen Hawking’s ‘theory of everything’ at police while being detained...
Good Friday wasn’t one of my best Fridays admits Jesus
Jesus H Christ has taken to social media in support of Tesco saying that, despite claims by religious extremists Good Friday was actually a...
Waterloo Road Grandma School Farce
A crisis has arisen in a Rochdale school after a Chinese whispers cock up of epic proportions went much further than any sane person...
Not all men, say men
Men would like you to know that the thing a man just did, just isn't something they would do
Following a recent incident where a...
Australia to import convicts and export coal – Says Turnbull
Australian Prime Minister, Malcolm Turnbull, has left the G20 Summit with what he called a "stupendous new deal". After much grovelling to British Prime...
Win Win Win with The Herald! We are giving away year’s free membership to...
That's right it's not a typo, we are feeling generous today at The Herald after an out of court settlement with them southern softies...
Facebook adds ‘I am drunk button’
Facebook has added an "I am drunk" button to the award winning range of useful buttons on your profile page.
The button will immediately quarantine...
Panic across UK as white substance continues to fall from sky
A state of emergency has been declared in a number of regions after a strange white substance fell from the sky recently.
As councils...
