Obama quietly pleased his G20 riots were bigger than Trump’s

1
President Barack Obama, who was born in America, is said to be privately pleased the riots at G20 summits he attended were bigger than...
Downing Street

Stubborn turd refuses to flush

6
A massive turd that is blocking the downstairs bog next to the Cabinet Meeting Room in Downing Street has been studiously ignoring hints that...

Farron Accepts Offer of Education Secretary As May Offers Anti-Brexit Coaltion

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Tim Farron spoke of his relief this evening as he accepted Theresa May's offer of a coalition government on the condition of an anti-Brexit...

UKIP elect Diane James leader

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UKIP have elected Diane James as their new leader. Apologies for our previous article that featured Mick Jagger from The Rollong Stones. Our intern Douglas has...

Sturgeon triggers IndyRef 2 after house lands on sister

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Nicola Sturgeon sensationally called for an independence referendum after a house came seemingly from nowhere and landed on her sister. Speaking through an interpreter she...

Game Over for Womb Raider Brad Pitt

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Hollywood power couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, better known as 'AngRad' have announced they are to divorce after 12 years together. Spokesman and agent...

I’m not homophobic, you’re just a filthy sinner! says singer

It's alright to be a judgey bigoted fuck if it's based on Bronze Age superstition, singer Kim Burrell is insisting.
Toddler Prisoner

Government plans to lower age of criminal responsibility to 2 YEARS OLD

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To help with the deficit, the government will be lowering the age of criminal responsibility to 2. The age of criminal responsibility is currently...

Melania Trump reveals her favourite iPod Playlist

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In an exclusive interview with The Rochdale Herald the former Eastern European 'model' and wife of President Elect Donald Trump revealed her favourite iPod playlist.
Theresa May

Only a grammar truth in May’s PMQs

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In this week's PMQs Jeremy Corbyn, the corduroy communist leader of what's left of the Labour Party (see what I did there?), asked Theresa...
Homeless

Government announce £100m fund to eradicate park benches and electrify shop doorways

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Housing and Homeless Ministers announced a package of measures worth £100m to eradicate homelessness today. As part of the measures 4,751 park and town benches...

Man vows to watch Game of Thrones right after the US Election, Breaking Bad...

Rochdale was in turmoil last night after discovering that the last remaining person in the UK yet to watch Season 6 of Game of...

Terror in the skies over Manchester airport!

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There was panic and pandemonium on a Jet2 flight to Rhodes yesterday morning when the editor of The Rochdale Herald, Quentin Q Fortesqueue, realised...

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