Trump and Putin plan the partition of Poland
It’s been revealed that American President Donald Trump and Russian President Vladamir Putin have agreed to partition Poland between their two countries.
Both leaders...
Dead refugees welcome say Home Office
Refugees will be welcome to Great Britain providing they are dead, under a new scheme announced by the Home Office.
The new measures, expected to...
Labour confirms 2018 party conference will be held in Mecca
The Labour Party has denied accusations of ‘Muslim appeasement’ at its annual conference in Brighton, after several eagle-eyed observers noticed that its conference banner...
Britons to get easy sex after Brexit as the whole world lines up to...
Good news on the prospects with Brexit this afternoon as news broke that the entire world is lining up to provide easy sex for...
For Fuck’s Sake, sighs Britain
The entire United Kingdom muttered "for fuck's sake" in unision yesterday afternoon after learning that Boris Johnson has been "elected: new Conservative leader and...
Tolkein With Tits set to dominate office conversations as Game of Thrones returns
As the umpteenth series of the godawful fantasy franchise "Game of Thrones" is due to air on Murdoch-vision this week, those with more refined...
Fat red faced old man quits boring 80s band
Shockwaves rang through Tin Pan Alley yesterday with the news that singer Tony Hadley was quitting 80s pop toppers Spandau Ballet.
In a cryptic tweet...
Dig for Victory, says Corbyn facing Brexit economic doom
Jeremy Corbyn, leader of the opposition and the second coming Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour, has set about his first week back in...
Sun exposes Cable as Strawberry fool
Liberal democrat leadership candidate "SIR" Vince Cable has been left looking a plum strawberry fool after his claim that Britain was running out of...
Spacey “to seek treatment” for being horny 20 years ago and coincidentally gay
The publicist for Kevin Spacey has announced that the Oscar-winning actor is seeking treatment, as reports emerged that another young man had nothing happen...
Massive chip dislocates Katie Hopkins shoulder
There were grave concerns for Katie Hopkins today when the massive chip she uses as a shoulder deepened and caused her arm to calve...
Government plans to lower age of criminal responsibility to 2 YEARS OLD
To help with the deficit, the government will be lowering the age of criminal responsibility to 2. The age of criminal responsibility is currently...
Only three UKIP leaders till Xmas
The election of the eleventh UKIP leader in the last calendar year has whipped the country into a frenzy of anticipation as it means...
















































