Heseltine denies drowning kitten admits to strangling puppy

0
Lord Sir Michael Heseltine of Sith has dismissed the outrage over his admitting to throttling a dog as "Hippy nonsense!" as animal lovers across...

Herald Guide to Parties Brexit Position

0
As the General Distraction looms ever closer, more and more people are wondering where the various parties stand on the issue of Brexit. So we...
Harvey Weinstein

Really Respectable Reputation of Casting Couch Crushed as Absolutely Amazing Allegations Horrify Hollywood Hierarchy

9
Hollywood, nay, America, nay the whole World, has been rocked to its core by allegations that a man abused his position of power, as...
Theresa May

Nah, I said smashed through a field of weed fam, claims PM

18
There’s bare girl jobs and mandem jobs, you feel me? “When’d all y’all start getting so disrespectful?” said Theresa May yesterday. “Maybe it was that Lord...

Watson Denies Corbyn Car Crash Rumours

0
Deputy Leader of the Labour Party, Tom Watson, has denied rumours that recent focus groups conducted by the party to determine popularity of alternative leaders involved simulated car accidents in which Jeremy Corbyn was involved in hit and run incidents.

Universal Tax Credit not as funny as reductive jokes about benefit cuts complain satirists

0
The National Union of Terrible Satirists, or NUTS, released a statement today complaining that it's almost impossible to make jokes about Universal Tax Credit because it's too bloody complicated.
Jeremy Corbyn

Jeremy Corbyn to lose seat under Tory boundary change plans

0
Lord Reginald Foxhunter-Shandy said: "It's the biggest boundary shake up since the last one". The plans unveiled today will see Jeremy Corbyn lose his Islington...

We’re just going to f**king do Brexit, you lot look after yourselves May tells...

1
The Prime Minister shocked the country today by forcing a kindly old lady in a blue and yellow hat that looked like an EU...

Amazon to train Animals to deliver your parcels

0
The world's largest internet retailer, and tax avoiding giant, Amazon are rumored to be conducting secret trials using animals to deliver parcels to your...

Man on cocaine has best idea ever

0
Barry Inferness, a 34 year old brick layer from Scotland made the discovery at a house party in Smallbridge last week; "A just thought, yer...
Mark Garnier

What’s wrong with asking your secretary to buy you a dildo, asks complete dildo

0
The king of Dildos and soon to be former International Trade Minister Mark Garnier is to investigated over a potential breach of the ministerial code after he admitted to asking a former parliamentary aide to buy him a dildo
Professor

Nobody could have done better than Corbyn, says Nobody

0
Nobody, who is the shadow secretary of state for Northern Ireland, claimed today that, had he been Labour leader, Labour could have won the...

Farron Accepts Offer of Education Secretary As May Offers Anti-Brexit Coaltion

0
Tim Farron spoke of his relief this evening as he accepted Theresa May's offer of a coalition government on the condition of an anti-Brexit...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts