Middle class first time buyers struggling to afford luxury and luxury homes

0
Middle class first time buyers are up in arms over house prices this week as the housing market continued to slow while the price...
Britain First

Britain First strangely quiet over Jo Cox murder

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This week saw the conviction and sentencing of Thomas Mair in the case of the tragic murder of MP Jo Cox.  During the murder, the...

Community schools plan morning assemblies in Mosques

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Community schools are to hold mandatory morning assemblies in Mosques across the borough, it has been announced. Rochdale Council made the announcement earlier today, releasing...

Government vow to provide every child with prayer mat by 2020 to promote multi-culturalism.

19
The thorny issue of the integration into society of immigrants, particularly Muslims, has been strained of late. Now the UK government has come up...
Black Jesus

Black Jesus denies rumours he is bowling hurricanes at Mar a lago

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Speaking from his home near Cape Verde, Black Jesus denied that his decision to spend time exploring his roots in West Africa has had...
Angry man, steam coming from ears

This drive is not for driving

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Your neighbour has confirmed he won’t be parking his car in his drive. He believes that the role of his drive is to provide an...

Corbyn reveals election strategy, if I ignore it it’ll get better

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As Theresa May surprised the country by announcing a snap election supposed Leader of the Opposition Jeremy Corbyn was nowhere to be found. Only hours later ...

Rochdale Infirmary to Trial Office Hours

1
Due to severe cut backs, Rochdale Infirmary is to trial working office hours only. This is a first in the UK since the inception...
Referee

‘So what?’ ask arseholes in response to significant event

0
Football fans across the UK went out of their way this week to prove that their point-missing dim-wittedness was ‘by far the greatest stupidity...

U.S transgender community ‘relieved’ they will not die fighting for Trump

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As President Trump, leader of the free world, announced that transgender citizens would no longer be allowed to serve the U.S. Armed forces in...

Soon to be estranged husband proposes ‘transitional sexual union’

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Under the suggested terms of the deal, Britton, 34, would remain in the family home for up to a further two years, and would be entitled to avail himself of all the sexual benefits associated with a normal marriage.
Chocolate

Theresa May outraged over plans to drop Great from Great Britain

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Chocolatiers are responding to Theresa May's ire this afternoon after "Great" was dropped from "Great Britain " in a number of confectionary products. From now...

Labour Proposes New Tax on Books

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Labour Party Central Office has announced that it would consider forcing book publishers to pay a levy to help pay for Momentum leaflets and...
Downing Street

Stubborn turd refuses to flush

6
A massive turd that is blocking the downstairs bog next to the Cabinet Meeting Room in Downing Street has been studiously ignoring hints that...

May red faced after failure to personally deliver EU nationals deportation letters

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The Office of the Prime Minister Theresa May served up a rare slice of humble pie as Ms May apologised for not personally handing...
Interrogation

Torture works say fictional super villains and Donald Trump

2
Unnatural freaks, social outcasts and fictional horror characters are lining up to support President Trump's assertion that "torture works". "I've racked my brains to find...

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