Priti Patel congratulates Boris Johnson on arrival of 3001005789th baby boy
Priti Patel, Minister for whatever the heck it is she does has been one of the first Government Ministers to congratulate Boris Johnson and...
Deer left shaken by run in with Prince
A Balmoral based deer has spoken out after being run down by the heir to the British throne.
Dougal Hornhead spoke to the Herald after...
Who you calling dangerous? Asks Kumbuka
Today the Rochdale Herald is delighted to bring you our exclusive interview with Kumbuka the gorilla who briefly escaped from London Zoo this week.
RH:...
Magic mushroom season not as bad as rumoured
Rumours that this year's magic mushroom season has been a let down are made of regret and the memory of socks from Bolivia, says...
Russia denies involvement as Springwatch ‘Favourite British Wild Animal’ poll won by the weasel.
Questions have been asked as the BBC Springwatch poll to find Britain's favourite wild animal was convincingly won by the weasel.
"I have to say...
House spiders launch campaign to reduce number of ‘sleeping mouth’ fatalities
A group of house spiders has launched a campaign aimed at reducing the number of arachnids being swallowed by sleeping humans.
Dead whale found in Thames was Russian spy
The Government have announced that a whale that has been found dead beside the River Thames was a Russian spy.
The whale was found beside...
Pigeon chess champion embarrassed at being included in metaphor with Boris Johnson
A pigeon chess grand master from Rochdale has been telling us how he finds it a embarrassing to be included with Boris Johnson in...
Bears cleared of ‘shitting in the woods’ says watchdog
The independent Bear Complaints Commission has found that there is no evidence that bears are guilty of shitting in the woods.
The misconduct watchdog,...
New York Giraffe constipated not pregnant
On the 11th of February, the Animal Adventure Park in Harpursville, New York began a live feed from the inside of a Giraffe pen.
'April' the...
Attenborough Discovers New Great Ape Species In America
Noted elderly naturist David Attenborough was cock-a-hoop yesterday when he announced the discovery of the first new species of great ape for many years.
Mr...
Christians, Muslims, Satanists Opposed To Pokemon Go
Following the UK release of Pokemon Go ten days ago, several prominent spokespersons for leading UK religious organisations have spoken out, condemning the game...
Accusations of Racism Hit John Lewis Commercial
The new John Lewis advert, featuring a black British family giving their daughter a trampoline for Christmas has been denounced as racist.
"It's an...
BBC confident Planet Earth 3 will contain ‘at least 80% Attenborough’
The BBC are desperately trying to complete series 3 of their hugely popular Planet Earth programme, as with all the fuckery 2016 has offered...
Sheffield Council declare majority of citizens think world is flat
Sheffield Council has been forced to declare their belief in a flat earth after applying the same statistical analysis to a recent on-line poll...
Trump ecstatic hurricane Harvey is bigger than every hurricane under Obama
Donald Trump says he's especially proud that Hurricane Harvey is bigger than any Hurricane President Obama presided over.
In a speech he said, "Watched...
