Alien Overlords to Admit Existence is a computer simulation.

0
It is to be announced that reality as we understand it is nothing more than a computer simulation. The shock admission was beamed into the...

Pigeon chess champion embarrassed at being included in metaphor with Boris Johnson

0
A pigeon chess grand master from Rochdale has been telling us how he finds it a embarrassing to be included with Boris Johnson in...

Priti Patel congratulates Boris Johnson on arrival of 3001005789th baby boy

0
Priti Patel, Minister for whatever the heck it is she does has been one of the first Government Ministers to congratulate Boris Johnson and...

Attenborough Discovers New Great Ape Species In America

0
Noted elderly naturist David Attenborough was cock-a-hoop yesterday when he announced the discovery of the first new species of great ape for many years. Mr...
Dog Window

Dog who wanted to go outside immediately wants to come back in

0
A dog who has spent the last hour and a half peering longingly through the patio doors at the garden is now peering longingly...

Deer left shaken by run in with Prince 

0
A Balmoral based deer has spoken out after being run down by the heir to the British throne. Dougal Hornhead spoke to the Herald after...

Idiot Dies in Karmic Avalanche

0
An idiot died in an avalanche of Karma in the town of Colle delle Oche near Turin, Italy yesterday. Veterinarian Luciano Ponzetto, who split his...

Bears cleared of ‘shitting in the woods’ says watchdog

0
The independent Bear Complaints Commission has found that there is no evidence that bears are guilty of shitting in the woods. The misconduct watchdog,...
Wasps

Britons thrilled by early encounter with year’s first Wasp

0
Millions of Britons were given an early taste of the joys of springtime over the weekend, after the unseasonable February warmth prompted the first...

Packham challenges Attenborough in bid to become BBC Natural History Unit alpha male

0
Chris Packham has challenged Sir David Attenborough in a bid to become the BBC Natural History Unit's alpha male. In a display that witnesses have...

Christians, Muslims, Satanists Opposed To Pokemon Go

0
Following the UK release of Pokemon Go ten days ago, several prominent spokespersons for leading UK religious organisations have spoken out, condemning the game...
Magic Mushroom

Magic mushroom season not as bad as rumoured

0
Rumours that this year's magic mushroom season has been a let down are made of regret and the memory of socks from Bolivia, says...

Government expands badger cull to five new areas despite warnings it doesn’t work

0
We to need press on with the solution,  said Theressa May when questioned before all the MP's went on their jollies, leaving the...
Flat earth map

Sheffield Council declare majority of citizens think world is flat

0
Sheffield Council has been forced to declare their belief in a flat earth after applying the same statistical analysis to a recent on-line poll...
John Lewis Weasel

Accusations of Racism Hit John Lewis Commercial

0
The new John Lewis advert, featuring a black British family giving their daughter a trampoline for Christmas has been denounced as racist. "It's an...

Who you calling dangerous? Asks Kumbuka

0
Today the Rochdale Herald is delighted to bring you our exclusive interview with Kumbuka the gorilla who briefly escaped from London Zoo this week. RH:...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts