Kanye West

Fred and Rose distance themselves from Kanye

0
The solicitor for the notorious murderers Fred and Rose West have released a statement saying that Mrs West and her deceased husband are 'in...

Police force man to remove clothing on Rochdale beach

4
Photographs have emerged of armed police confronting a diver on Rochdale's now notorious Stansfield Beach. In this most recent effort to enforce new laws...
Burkina

Outrage as women flout Burkini ban on Rochdale beach

110
Police were called yesterday afternoon after a large group of women were caught flouting the controversial "Burkini Ban" on Rochdale's world famous Stansfield Beach. Members...
Ronald McDonald

Ronald McDonald found dead close to his home

0
The beloved obesity peddler Ronald McDonald was found dead in the street in the early hours of this morning. The cause of death is...

Obviously McCanns done it, case closed by bloke down the pub

0
After ten years everybody and their dog is still absolutely convinced that they know exactly what happened in the Maddie McCann tragedy in Portugal. “It’s...

US police to swear allegiance directly to Trump and be called the Orange Shirts

1
In a bold new democracy-busting move, Emperor Trump has decreed the police will now swear an oath of allegiance directly to the person of...
ISIS

Isis Claims Responsibility for Education Fair Funding Formula Terror

0
In a shock announcement this morning, that surprised no one, a spokes-stool for Isis (other names are available) claimed credit for the proposed funding...
Marty McFly

Marty McFly and Dr Emmett Brown arrested for crimes against humanity for failing to...

0
The time travelling duo, Marty McFly and Dr Emmett Brown, are currently being held in the custody of Sheriff James Strickland in Hill Valley, Northern California. Strickland...

Intentional explosions totally different to terror

0
After around 30 people were injured, many more shocked and people consequently feeling terrified, New York officials are keen to point out that the...
Donald Trump

Lord Lucan, Pol Pot, Martin Borman ,Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi and Boko Haram emerge from...

0
An entire top shelf of global mass murderers have signalled they plan to emerge from hiding following the announcement by US president Donald trump...

Rochdale Murderer Caught

0
There was shock and disbelief amongst Rochdale motorists yesterday as the police went out and caught a murderer, instead of stopping poor innocent speed...
Santa

Scandinavian ‘Too Drunk To Stand’ Following Drunk-Sleighing Arrest

0
Rochdale magistrates heard how a visitor from Lapland, Mr Nicholas Saint (1,747) created havoc in Rochdale with his erratic control over his team of excitable reindeer pulling a bright red sleigh.

Rochdale Cowboy killed in cow heel fight while raiding vape store.

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The notorious Rochdale Cowboy reached the end of the line yesterday when he and the rest of his 'Hole in the road' gang were...

Daily Mail editor accused of Crocodile Tears following Polish migrant murder

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The editor of poisonous bog roll manufacturer, The Daily Mail, was accused of shedding crocodile tears by The Rochdale Herald after a Polish man...
Brian Cox

Brian Cox to face Hague war crimes tribunal for 1997 hit Things Can Only...

21
Brian Cox is due to face a hearing at The Hague this week to face the charge that he is responsible for the deaths of more than one million Iraqis.
UK Police

Rising crime and falling numbers of police are incredible coincidence, insists Downing Street

0
Rising crime rates and the falling numbers of policemen on the streets are just an amazing coincidence and are in no way related, sources...

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