New Year Eve Party

Turn your house into a Costa and other tips for hosting gatherings of more...

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The Government have announced that gatherings of more than 6 people are to be banned. But what do you do if your "Company AGM"...

Police call time on sex pests

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Paedophile sex pests across England and Wales are to be fitted with bells, in a new scheme announced by the police today. The new devices...

Ugly scenes in Rochdale Waitrose as champagne socialists panic buy Brie and Balsamic Vinegar

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Things took a turn for the decidedly unpleasant at the plush new Waitrose store in Rochdale's upmarket Shawclough Road area this afternoon as a...
Laptop

Not all men, say men

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Men would like you to know that the thing a man just did, just isn't something they would do Following a recent incident where a...

‘Fake Sheikh’ Gets 15 Months For Making Obscene Phone Calls

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Undercover Herald reporter Bazzer McNood has been sentenced to 15 months (suspended) plus a 20 hour Community Service Order for making lewd and obscene nuisance phone...
Ancient text

Daily Mail claim Koran found propping up wobbly table leg in Thomas Mair’s kitchen

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In a shocking turn of events, the Daily Mail have claimed police forensics have revealed to them that during the investigation into Thomas Mair...

Donald Trump arrested for vandalism after smashing own star

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News broke a short while ago that Donald Trump's celebrity star had been smashed to bits on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. A Mexican man...

Jeremy Hunt victim of cruel nominative determinism sting operation

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?UK health secretary Jeremy Hunt has fallen victim to a cruel nominative determinism sting operation perpetrated by an East European cockney rhyming slang gang,...

Unnamed Rochdale MP to be charged with being drunk in charge of a mobility...

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An as yet unnamed MP for Rochdale has allegedly been arrested for being drunk in charge of a mobility scooter. Police were called in the...

Three in critical condition after tragic scone miss-pronunciation attack

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Police have closed access to Battenburg street in Middleton today as the investigation into an altercation at the Middleton tea rooms has left three...

Men in Rural England “Shitting Themselves” as Helen Titchener Walks Free

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Men up and down the UK will now be sleeping with one eye open and replacing all the knives in the house with plastic...
Prison Bars

Rochdale Prison To Hold Open Day

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A popular Rochdale prison is to hold an open day this July to help spread awareness of the work they do. HM Prison Buckley Hall...

Sir Philip Green in Robin Hood Shocker

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Serial cash withdrawer Sir Philip Green has caused fresh controversy today with claims that revered British folk hero Robin Hood was the' worst sort...
Man holding a gun

Mass shootings ‘fact of life’ says only country where mass shootings happen

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Ralph H. Ick, head of the Texas branch of the NRA made the shocking statement yesterday after seven children were slain and three were...
Hillsborough

Hillsborough survivors reassure families of Grenfell Tower victims that justice will be swift

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Hillsborough a fine benchmark. Reports are reaching Herald HQ that Grenfell survivors paused on their way out of the tower to loot the dead. They...
Terroist

British Patriots demand Register of Terrorists

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Paul Golding has picked up the baton from Nick Griffin today in calling for a Register of Potential Terrorists. The call comes in the wake...

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