Jacob Rees-Mogg snapped drinking mead on the night bus
Haunted hatstand Jacob Rees-Mogg has been forced to issue an apology today after he was snapped drinking mead on the night bus on Tuesday.
The...
Three in critical condition after tragic scone miss-pronunciation attack
Police have closed access to Battenburg street in Middleton today as the investigation into an altercation at the Middleton tea rooms has left three...
MP claims he was researching book on whether breasts make noises like clown horns
Leading MP Pete Who speaks out after being named in the Dirty Dossier.
The Member of Parliament for Goveshire West, Pete Who, has given a...
Daily Mail Editor suicidal with remorse over Jo Cox murder immigrant headline jibe
There were scenes of jubilation around the country this afternoon after Paul Dacre "did the decent thing" and shot himself with a revolver after drinking half a bottle of scotch at Northcliffe House.
Rochdale Cowboy killed in cow heel fight while raiding vape store.
The notorious Rochdale Cowboy reached the end of the line yesterday when he and the rest of his 'Hole in the road' gang were...
Man behind Anonymous turns out to be 13 year old boy from Rochdale
Fans of computer hacker extrordinaires and Internet fighters for justice, Anonymous, will be feeling very let down today with the news that the mastermind...
Study finds people with pixelated faces 70% more likely to commit crime
A study carried out by some of the country's top criminologists has highlighted a surprising correlation between people with pixelated faces and a predisposition...
Duke of Edinburgh embroiled in food poisoning compensation scam
The Duke of Edinburgh is reported to have become embroiled in a food poisoning compensation scam scandal today just hours after being discharged from...
Government to cut costs by putting prisoners in charge of prisons
The Government has announced plans to cut costs by putting prisoners in charge of prisons. The announcement comes after the successful conclusion of a...
EDL firebombs PC World in Rochdale town centre
The computer superstore PC World, this morning lies in tatters as a pile of smouldering rubble following a devastating attack last night.
The trouble began...
Basil Brush on the defensive as police release CCTV image of ‘Croydon Cat Killer’
Television celebrity Basil Brush has been forced to reject allegations that he is responsible for the gruesome deaths of over 400 cats across London and the...
That’s how you know you’ve fucked up No.72. Mass Shootings a Daily Occurence
America, land of the brave and home of the free as well as Donald Trump & Charles Manson, hit an important milestone this week....
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
G4S win contract to run Guantanamo Bay
Top US officials today confirmed that security company G4S have been granted the contract to oversee all operations in the somewhat controversial detention centre...
Greater Manchester Police hire youngest ever Special Constable
Greater Manchester Police have hired the youngest ever special Constable this week. James Cannings was sworn in by Chief Constable Rob Potts on Thursday.
James...
Ronald McDonald found dead close to his home
The beloved obesity peddler Ronald McDonald was found dead in the street in the early hours of this morning. The cause of death is...
