Men warned not to date clever & pretty girls who might get “a bit...

55
A Judge has warned men that they only have themselves to blame if they date very clever, very pretty girls who are "a bit...
Kanye West

Fred and Rose distance themselves from Kanye

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The solicitor for the notorious murderers Fred and Rose West have released a statement saying that Mrs West and her deceased husband are 'in...
Ronald McDonald

Ronald McDonald found dead close to his home

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The beloved obesity peddler Ronald McDonald was found dead in the street in the early hours of this morning. The cause of death is...

MP claims he was researching book on whether breasts make noises like clown horns

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Leading MP Pete Who speaks out after being named in the Dirty Dossier. The Member of Parliament for Goveshire West, Pete Who, has given a...

Intentional explosions totally different to terror

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After around 30 people were injured, many more shocked and people consequently feeling terrified, New York officials are keen to point out that the...
Brian Cox

Brian Cox to face Hague war crimes tribunal for 1997 hit Things Can Only...

21
Brian Cox is due to face a hearing at The Hague this week to face the charge that he is responsible for the deaths of more than one million Iraqis.
Blackeye

999 rescue for man who misunderstood the meaning of ‘rape robot’

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A dramatic and embarrassing rescue involving two fire engines and four police cars was underway this morning, after one man failed to realise his...
Criminal have pixelated faces

Study finds people with pixelated faces 70% more likely to commit crime

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A study carried out by some of the country's top criminologists has highlighted a surprising correlation between people with pixelated faces and a predisposition...

Daily Mail Editor suicidal with remorse over Jo Cox murder immigrant headline jibe

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There were scenes of jubilation around the country this afternoon after Paul Dacre "did the decent thing" and shot himself with a revolver after drinking half a bottle of scotch at Northcliffe House.

Man Dressed As Batman Chasing Man Dressed As Clown Captured By Man Dressed As...

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Rochdale Town Centre, and a man dressed as Batman who has been spotted in the locale chasing a man dressed as a Killer Clown...
Paddington Bear

Outrage as Paddington Bear deported back to Peru

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Much loved star of children's literature, TV and films, Paddington Bear, has been arrested and deported to Peru, as part of a round up of...

Reports of widespread rioting across UK takes government by surprise

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Tonight, the U.K. Is in disarray. The major cities of London, Manchester, Liverpool, Leeds and Birmingham are in lockdown with reports of outbreaks of...

Donald Trump arrested for vandalism after smashing own star

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News broke a short while ago that Donald Trump's celebrity star had been smashed to bits on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. A Mexican man...
gavel and block

Trump a performance artist, claims Attorney

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As the case against Trump supporter and white nationalist butt-nugget Matthew Heimbach heats up, his lawyer has said that Trump may well be called...
Gun held in front of American flag

Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans

2
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
Burkina

Outrage as women flout Burkini ban on Rochdale beach

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Police were called yesterday afternoon after a large group of women were caught flouting the controversial "Burkini Ban" on Rochdale's world famous Stansfield Beach. Members...

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