Man Dressed As Batman Chasing Man Dressed As Clown Captured By Man Dressed As...
Rochdale Town Centre, and a man dressed as Batman who has been spotted in the locale chasing a man dressed as a Killer Clown...
EU kebab ban receives chilli reception in Burnley
The EU move to ban phosphates in donner kebabs has sent a shockwave through the British culinary world.
Keith Braithwaite, local restaurateur and winner of...
Rochdale’s Brickcroft Lane Social Club unveil The Danczuk Memorial Bin
It has taken years of diligent campaigning and endless hours of tough negotiating but finally Simon Danczuk has achieved something material for the citizens...
Only two Prime Ministers until Christmas
It may only be July but there are only two Prime Ministers until Christmas. That's according to the British Christmas Monitoring League.
The warning comes...
Theresa May to communicate Brexit deal using dance
Theresa May will communicate the UK's Brexit plan to the House of Commons later today using the medium of dance.
One insider told us, "The...
I’ve just made a life size jelly of Donald Trump, I fear I may...
“You have to send help.” Dr Thump implored the emergency operator. “If this jelly gets out of my fridge there is no telling what it will do. It might start a nuclear war or worse.”
UKIP Apologises For Not Knowing What Obvious Means
UKIP were forced to admit today that big words like "joke" and "obvious" are generally beyond their grasp.
The announcement came after a social media...
Rochdale Online to give Danczuk day off
In a miraculous change of heart Rochdale Online has decided to give the suspended MP Simon Danczuk a break. Editor Sandra Simonhater said "He...
Burnley Nativity Play cancelled after search for 3 wise men and virgin ends in...
Burnley Council has been forced to cancel its annual community Nativity Play for the 126th consecutive year in succession.
After another exhaustive search of the...
Rochdale man surprised he hasn’t “turned out okay”
Brian Bamford from Bamford got the shock news that "he hasn't turned out okay" after a neighbour called the police when she saw him...
Archbishops To Sue Builders Over Health and Safety Gone Mad
A group of five Archbishops of Canterbury are to sue the building firm Klumsi 'n Fook.
Klumsi 'n Fook, were carrying out renovation works on...
Rochdale Toddler Softplay Centre to rebrand as Dante’s Seventh Circle of Hell
It's rumoured the world famous café and toddler soft play centre Tumble Tots in Rochdale will shortly be rebranding as Dante's Seventh Circle of...
Police free distressed dog left in locked car in Burnley carpark
POLICE were forced to smash the window of a locked car parked outside Asda in order release a distressed dog inside the vehicle on...
Rochdale Nightmare Scenario As Shops Run Dry Of Pie Supply
Rochdale citizens were today warned against panic buying one of the staples of their diet.
A widespread shortage of Futtock's Pies has been reported...
‘Fake Sheikh’ Gets 15 Months For Making Obscene Phone Calls
Undercover Herald reporter Bazzer McNood has been sentenced to 15 months (suspended) plus a 20 hour Community Service Order for making lewd and obscene nuisance phone...
Police find cannabis farm at Rochdale old folks home
Cannabis plants have been uncovered at 'Bright Horizons' home for the elderly, Kirkholt, this morning.
Police describe the haul as a kick in the...
