Rochdale’s Indian Youth Bemoan Lack of “English” Takeaways
Rochdale's Indian youth have complained that there is a distinct lack of late night 'English' takeaway food available in the town.
"You know what it's...
Put a top on, you’re not Poldark man told.
A Rochdale man has been told to put a top on whilst he does the gardening as he's in no danger of ever being...
UKIP Apologises For Not Knowing What Obvious Means
UKIP were forced to admit today that big words like "joke" and "obvious" are generally beyond their grasp.
The announcement came after a social media...
Had an accident that wasn’t your fault? No? Want one? – Rochdale Herald TripsAdvisor...
Have you had an accident that wasn't your fault and that could net you £thousands in compensation? No? Well do you want one?
Today the...
Twat ruins barbecue with guitar
Reports are coming in that a twat has ruined a perfectly serviceable barbecue after finding an old guitar next to a sofa in the...
Greater Manchester Police hire youngest ever Special Constable
Greater Manchester Police have hired the youngest ever special Constable this week. James Cannings was sworn in by Chief Constable Rob Potts on Thursday.
James...
It’s a muffin say experts ending the debate once and for all
An argument over the name of a baked bread product that is traditionally cut in twain and filled with goodness like chips, bacon or...
Rochdale man surprised he hasn’t “turned out okay”
Brian Bamford from Bamford got the shock news that "he hasn't turned out okay" after a neighbour called the police when she saw him...
Archbishops To Sue Builders Over Health and Safety Gone Mad
A group of five Archbishops of Canterbury are to sue the building firm Klumsi 'n Fook.
Klumsi 'n Fook, were carrying out renovation works on...
Black death condemned for being racist
Traditional remedies, like bleeding and mercury, have proved ineffective. Complementary therapists have suggested vaccination, but have been dismissed by mothers who prefer their infants to die naturally rather than to become autistic church goers.
Well I’ve never caught anything off my kids before, Facebook mum lies
Before 2020, Rochdale mum Di Coughlan had rarely posted anything other than pictures of her adorable children and grimacing husband. That all changed a...
Rochdale Herald attempts to break world record for the longest newspaper headline ever ends...
All at the Herald are devastated said Doris the tea lady.
It is too soon to spoon say Northern Rail commuters
Northern Rail commuters have confirmed that the length of time it takes to get to work is definitely too soon to spoon.
28 year old...
Couple still at bottle bank
A Rochdale couple is now entering their third day of disposing of bottles at their local bottle bank.
People nobody has heard of resign from party that no longer has purpose
UKIP, the party whose sole purpose was to foster the UK public to vote to leave the EU- which happened despite them- is apparently...
Eager traffic tyrant issuing parking fines willy-nilly in the town
Disgruntled shopper Eileen McCarthy nipped into Poundland around lunchtime on Friday leaving her tartan bag on wheels parked up on the kerbside.
To her dismay...
