Fission Chips

There’s a bloke works in our chip shop and he swears he’s Kim Jong...

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A Rochdale fish and chip shop owner has been telling us how one of his employees is convinced he Kim Jong Un. Ray Fry told...

Unnamed Rochdale MP to be charged with being drunk in charge of a mobility...

An as yet unnamed MP for Rochdale has allegedly been arrested for being drunk in charge of a mobility scooter. Police were called in the...

Transfer News: Surprise deal Rochdale – Man Utd

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Transfer News: In a shock late move, minnows Rochdale have thrashed out a deal with giants Manchester United. As this weekend brought an end to...
Billboard saying "No pies"

Rochdale Nightmare Scenario As Shops Run Dry Of Pie Supply

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Rochdale citizens were today warned against panic buying one of the staples of their diet. A widespread shortage of Futtock's Pies has been reported...

Smallbridge Flats Man Convinced Pigeon Likes to Watch him Hoover Naked

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While spending a good portion of his weekly income on the Euromillions, Mr. Garry Lee Shaw complained about the fifth or even sixth time...

Man in his 30’s caught using Snapchat

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32 year old office worker Damian Green from Middleton has admitted using snapchat in a desperate attempt to look "cool" and "down with the...

Lunts Exhibition Returns To Rochdale Central Library

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The popular exhibition celebrating the life and work of the Lunts is due to return to Rochdale Central Library next week. Rochdale born couple Cybil...

People nobody has heard of resign from party that no longer has purpose

UKIP, the party whose sole purpose was to foster the UK public to vote to leave the EU- which happened despite them- is apparently...

Shock as traces of vegetables found in supermarket ready meals

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Food enthusiasts have demanded an enquiry after research showed that as many as 1 in 10 supermarket ready meals contain trace amounts of vegetables. A...

Rochdale letting agency wins top award. 

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A prestigious national industry award has been won by local letting agents Fyre, Trappe and Hassel.   The British Association of Letting Agencies awarded the...
Paul Nuttall

Paul Nuttall in surprise bid to become MP for Covfefe

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In a move which has delighted the electorate of Boston and Skegness, Nuttall has transferred his allegiance. Nutcase claims divine intervention: "According to the Gospel of...

Drowning Man Rescued from Gorton Pothole

Following a night out with his mates, a man who fell into a pothole in Gorton, Manchester was rescued by a passing stranger. The...

No Segs Please, We’re Rochdalians

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Barmy Council Imposes Blanket Blakey Ban Rochdale Metropolitan Borough Council have imposed a blanket ban on Segs, the popular metal footwear protector, following complaints from the...

Nobody fancies Simon Danczuk – Rochdale Herald Poll reveals

In a shocking twist in the "Simon Danczuk pulled a 22 year old" scandal The Rochdale Herald can exclusively reveal that is was all...
Homeless man

Homeless looking forward to making lots of new friends

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The homeless are celebrating the Conservative victory as they are looking forward to making lots of new friends. We spoke to Brian Thompson, a Big...

Rochdale tourists furious as they’re falsely sold ‘Zombie Experience’

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We were furious - Clive Gulliver told us. Clive Gulliver and his wife Amanda were visiting the historic town as there was no where...

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