Grandparent babysitting for half term wonders “Is it too early for a drink?” Monday...
A grandparent who nonchalantly offered to babysit for the entire half term week has already wondered if it's too early for a drink?
Granny Syllable,...
Racists Shocked To Learn Arabic Words Have English Translations
Racists up and down the country have been shocked to learn that certain Arabic words like “Allah” and “Halal” actually translate into regular English...
Rochdale Bypass Approved
The rest of the UK today approved a bypass scheme for Rochdale. Using an EU grant while it is still available, the plan entails...
Survey reveals majority of Britons ‘don’t know where Rochdale is’
A recent survey carried out by fifth formers at the Don Estelle Academy (formerly the Cyril Smith School for Boys) in Rochdale revealed that...
Naked gym guy insists “I’m just high on life”
Reports are circulating that a middle aged man stripped stark bollock naked last night at local budget gym, LoveMuscle.
Eyewitnesses claim he was beating his...
Burnley twins with itself
After an extensive search, the Burnley Council has decided that the town best suited to twinning with Burnley is Burnley itself.
"We hired a consultant...
Lisa Stansfield’s New Album Celebrates Rochdale Hero
Fans of Rochdale songstress Lisa Stansfield will be pleased to hear that her latest release, the eighth album from the evergreen pop sensation, is out...
Gracie Fields sculptor accidentally sent picture of David Jason
It's embarrassing - said Councillor Dale Whiting. "It's supposed to be our tribute to the legendary Gracie Fields but it looks like Del Boy....
Sports Direct worker in critical condition after selling bag for life and giant mug
Medics were today called to Sports Direct at the Kingsway Shopping Centre in Rochdale after a member of the till staff collapsed in shock.
Mary...
Man who had letter published in local paper astonished that nothing changed
A Rochdale resident, Mr P. Scratching, was overjoyed when his letter to the editor of the Rochdale Herald was published in full with only...
Woakes Croaks – Jokes Hoax Chokes Stokes’ Folks
It has been revealed that a story about England cricket all-rounder Ben Stokes, which was definitely not printed in the Rochdale Herald, was a...
Local patriot spends £25,000 turning his head into a giant POPPY
With Remembrance Sunday just under two weeks away, a Rochdale man has made what he regards as the ultimate sacrifice in honour of our troops - by having his head...
Hull favourite for Turner prize for ironic depiction of City of Culture
Kingston Upon Hull has been tipped by the bookies to win the Turner Prize for Irony this year.
The famed port city and its people...
Rochdale unaffected by US Government shutdown confirms Council chief
Rochdale - The leader of Rochdale Borough Council, Councillor Allen Brett, has reassured residents of the town that they won't be affected by the...
Local luxury goods firm goes bust
High end retailer, Lewis Veeton Moway, has closed its doors for the last time, citing poor sales despite a massive promotional campaign.
Rupert Cholmondley-Featherstonehaugh, the...
Rochdale’s Brickcroft Lane Social Club unveil The Danczuk Memorial Bin
It has taken years of diligent campaigning and endless hours of tough negotiating but finally Simon Danczuk has achieved something material for the citizens...
