Rochdale man finds his keys in the first place he looks
In an incredible turn of events a local Rochdale man found his keys in the first place he looked for them this afternoon.
Steve Dickinson,...
Manchester tram ‘spontaneous combustion’ victim named
Commuters were left stunned this morning when Londoner Harry Turner spontaneously burst into flames aboard a Manchester tram.
The tragedy occurred after he was forced...
‘Childhood vaccines prolonged my agonising march towards death’ claims nihilist.
A local nihilist has started a campaign against vaccinations, arguing that they force children to endure the pain and sadness of their futile existence.
Stephen...
Home Office Play Matchmaker for Rochdale’s Bridget Joneses
The Rochdale Herald can reveal controversial Home Office plans to settle new male immigrants in areas of Britain with too many single women in...
Instead of ‘Tube Chat’ First busses Manchester introduce ‘Sod Off!’ badges
While TFL farts about with Tube Chat badges angry commuters in the chatty northern city of Rochdale have been wearing them with some varying...
Husband fails to avoid loaded question
A Rochdale man is currently receiving counselling and treatment for first-degree burns after failing to give the correct answer to a blatantly loaded question...
Gerry Anderson to Return as String Puppet
Die-hard Thunderbirds fans are celebrating the surprise announcement that Gerry Anderson is to headline the upcoming Cromer 60s Festival.
North Norfolk District Council broke the...
Sock Finds Owner as Appeal Goes Viral
Derek Winstanley of Rochdale was today emotionally reunited with his sock after a heart-wrenching appeal went viral amongst bored middle-managers & housewives who wanted...
World hunger solved after Jeremy Corbyn urinates on field
World hunger has been declared over after Jeremy Corbyn urinated on a field just outside Rochdale.
One aide told us, "Jeremy was returning from one...
Homeless looking forward to making lots of new friends
The homeless are celebrating the Conservative victory as they are looking forward to making lots of new friends.
We spoke to Brian Thompson, a Big...
Rochdale woman shocked when confronted by reality
Rochdale bride Shanice Kerslake was reduced to tears when a Marks and Spencer boss declared her wedding cake "shit".
Mrs Kerslake, 52, had designed the...
Rochdale Reds watch Man Utd forge ahead with Brexit plan
Members of the Rochdale Reds Man Utd supporters association may ask the High Court to step in over Jose Mourinho's apparent Brexit plans.
United manager...
Rochdale Council name their new rubbish truck Donald Dump
Rochdale Council recently held a competition to name it's new flagship refuse truck.
Amongst the suggestions offered were 'Binny McBin Face', 'Shit Truck' and 'Binner...
Fury as plastic poppy fetishists aren’t allowed to sing their favourite song
Royal British Legion members from Little Mynd, near Rochdale, have been denied the chance to sing their favourite song during their annual attendance at...
Survey reveals majority of Britons ‘don’t know where Rochdale is’
A recent survey carried out by fifth formers at the Don Estelle Academy (formerly the Cyril Smith School for Boys) in Rochdale revealed that...
Burnley twins with itself
After an extensive search, the Burnley Council has decided that the town best suited to twinning with Burnley is Burnley itself.
"We hired a consultant...
