Woakes Croaks – Jokes Hoax Chokes Stokes’ Folks
It has been revealed that a story about England cricket all-rounder Ben Stokes, which was definitely not printed in the Rochdale Herald, was a...
Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning.
As millions of us check up on the...
Family dog doesn’t understand why you reward your children with food
Malcolm, an inner city border collie, has spoken exclusively to the Rochdale Herald and explained he does not understand why the children in his...
Inheritance should be spent on chardonnay and cruises not care says Rochdale man
Rochdale man Martin Williams has spent today in his local pub attacking the 'Tory Death Tax'.
Williams 48, told the Herald, "It's ridiculous. My mum and...
Border collie describes his life as a series of trials
Malcolm, an inner city border collie, has spoken exclusively to the Rochdale Herald and explained he does not understand why the children in his...
Bacup bakery follow Delta Airlines’ lead, withdraw Britain First discount.
Following the conviction of their leaders for advanced wankery, local Britain First members today received another body blow.
In line with a recent decision...
Local patriot spends £25,000 turning his head into a giant POPPY
With Remembrance Sunday just under two weeks away, a Rochdale man has made what he regards as the ultimate sacrifice in honour of our troops - by having his head...
Rochdale DFS Sale has finally ended
Rochdale DFS announced the first end of a sale for a decade after running out of sofas yesterday.
DFS customers in Rochdale are expected to...
Self-publicist Simon Danczuk MP fails to start Twitter war with Vince Cable
Disgraced labour MP, serial text pest and pornography enthusiast Simon Danczuk accused the former Business Secretary Sir Vince Cable of being "old hat" on...
EU kebab ban receives chilli reception in Burnley
The EU move to ban phosphates in donner kebabs has sent a shockwave through the British culinary world.
Keith Braithwaite, local restaurateur and winner of...
It’s too damn hot to write satire says satirist
Dick Turnip, writer for the Rochdale Herald, has been left unable to write a single humorous thing commenting on, or parodying the day's news.
"It's...
May announces textile regeneration scheme for the Northern Powerhouse
As the race for the Tory Party Leadership heats up, Teresa May has today announced transformative economic reform plans for the Northern Powerhouse.
The ambitious...
Rochdale Police Find ‘Lost’ Horse in semi rural area
Reports from GMP Rochdale are somewhat vague to say the least, so the minimum we can assume from the information supplied is the horse is somewhere...
Playground craze leads Burnley kids to discover deodorant
Hundreds of Burnley schoolchildren are now aware of the existence of deodorant thanks to the recent playground craze.
The craze involves spraying deodorant from a...
Sheffield Tree-Felling Councillor Hospitalised With Irony Overdose
It has been revealed that Clr Brian 'Hodge' Podge, the Sheffield Councillor responsible for the hugely unpopular street tree felling programme, was rushed to...
Had an accident that wasn’t your fault? No? Want one? – Rochdale Herald TripsAdvisor...
Have you had an accident that wasn't your fault and that could net you £thousands in compensation? No? Well do you want one?
Today the...



















































