Trump Flag

I’ve just made a life size jelly of Donald Trump, I fear I may...

17
“You have to send help.” Dr Thump implored the emergency operator. “If this jelly gets out of my fridge there is no telling what it will do. It might start a nuclear war or worse.”
Danczuk

Simon Danczuk wins Prestigious most Tory Tweet Award 2017 Le Chatte d’Or

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Simon Danczuk has won the 2017 most Tory Tweet Award after taking to Twitter to complain about homeless beggars in Rochdale today.

Industrial Action Threatened as British Workers Jobs at Threat in Languages Row

Reports that several British workers have had their employment terminated from the world famous British sofa manufacturer Zestra, because they failed to learn Polish...

Rochdale Man breaks record for Most Conspiracies Believed

7
Local man, Kelvin Pastie, 31, an unemployed something or the other, believes he is one of the only people in the world to believe...
Fission Chips

There’s a bloke works in our chip shop and he swears he’s Kim Jong...

1
A Rochdale fish and chip shop owner has been telling us how one of his employees is convinced he Kim Jong Un. Ray Fry told...
Billboard saying "No pies"

Rochdale Nightmare Scenario As Shops Run Dry Of Pie Supply

0
Rochdale citizens were today warned against panic buying one of the staples of their diet. A widespread shortage of Futtock's Pies has been reported...

Harvey Weinstein is a Democrat is the new Hitler was a Vegetarian

5
Hip new fashy fashion hits Brownhill School All the coolest kids in Brownhill School, Rochdale, have adopted it.  “Yeah well, Harvey Weinstein was a Democrat so...

Man in his 30’s caught using Snapchat

0
32 year old office worker Damian Green from Middleton has admitted using snapchat in a desperate attempt to look "cool" and "down with the...

‘Fake Sheikh’ Gets 15 Months For Making Obscene Phone Calls

0
Undercover Herald reporter Bazzer McNood has been sentenced to 15 months (suspended) plus a 20 hour Community Service Order for making lewd and obscene nuisance phone...

DNA analysis of white poo on Rochdale street reveals that it comes from a...

2
Experts tracking down rogue dog owners in Rochdale came up with the shocking news that prehistoric species are alive and kicking. What's more, the...

Couple still at bottle bank

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A Rochdale couple is now entering their third day of disposing of bottles at their local bottle bank.

Miracle Declared As TK Maxx Customer Finds Acceptable Pair Of Jeans

1
A TK Maxx customer in Rochdale has described his purchase of a pair of jeans that look acceptable and fit perfectly as “nothing short...
Cat's Eyes

Traffic chaos as ALF steal M62 cat’s eyes

The M62 was plunged into chaos last night following the removal of nearly 500 cat's eyes from the motorway at Junction 20 by the...

Dog awards Michelin star to cat litter tray

0
Rover Thomson, a five year old chocolate labrador from Newlyn, has awarded a Michelin star to the cat litter tray located in his family...

Home Office Play Matchmaker for Rochdale’s Bridget Joneses

0
The Rochdale Herald can reveal controversial Home Office plans to settle new male immigrants in areas of Britain with too many single women in...

OUTRAGE as famous Rochdale nudist beach is closed for “cultural reasons”

8
There was OUTRAGE in Rochdale this afternoon after council documents were leaked to The Rochdale Herald about the forthcoming closure of the world famous...

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