Man who failed GCSE science now an expert in Novichok
A Rochdale man who failed GCSE science has revealed that he is now an expert in Novichok. Bill Board revealed his previously hidden talents...
Rochdale Herald Editor Re-admitted to Hospital
Herald editor, Quentin D. Fortesqueue has been re-admitted to Rochdale General Hospital for surgery to remove his tongue from his cheek.
The jaded and cynical...
Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning.
As millions of us check up on the...
First Burnley resident to complete 40 minute mile dies at 29
The Rochdale Herald is sad to report that the first Burnley resident to complete the 40 minute mile has died aged 29.
Bill Board completed...
3rd Day of Sunshine sees Hose Pipe Bans Across UK
As the heatwave currently hitting the UK enters its third day water companies across Britain have enforced hose pipe bans once again.
Despite months of...
Inheritance should be spent on chardonnay and cruises not care says Rochdale man
Rochdale man Martin Williams has spent today in his local pub attacking the 'Tory Death Tax'.
Williams 48, told the Herald, "It's ridiculous. My mum and...
Rochdale woman who found Hitler’s face on slice of toast converts to Nazism
A Rochdale woman who found Hitlers face in a slice of toast has revealed she's converted to Nazism.
The woman's son said, "About a week...
Rochdale Infirmary to Trial Office Hours
Due to severe cut backs, Rochdale Infirmary is to trial working office hours only. This is a first in the UK since the inception...
Paul Simon to redo one of his biggest hits in tribute to ex EDL...
In a world exclusive, The Rochdale Herald can reveal that super succesful singer songwriter, Paul Simon, is working on a rewrite of the hit...
Cheap bottle of wine is eventually returned to original gift giver
A bottle of £3.50 red wine from Lidl, which was brought to a house warming, has finally been returned to the cheapskate couple that...
Manchester residents perform ceremony to bring rain back
Manchester residents are delighted that their rituals to the Rain God have worked and banished the burning eye that brings only searing skin pain.
Dr...
Child believes summers are warm and England are good at football
Worrying news reaches us from a Rochdale suburb of a child who has not yet learned the truth
There are certain core truths you learn...
Rochdale woman in loo roll change shock
There were scenes of jubilant confusion in the Middleton area this afternoon after a Rochdale woman discovered that her husband had refilled the toilet...
Playground craze leads Burnley kids to discover deodorant
Hundreds of Burnley schoolchildren are now aware of the existence of deodorant thanks to the recent playground craze.
The craze involves spraying deodorant from a...
May announces textile regeneration scheme for the Northern Powerhouse
As the race for the Tory Party Leadership heats up, Teresa May has today announced transformative economic reform plans for the Northern Powerhouse.
The ambitious...
Woman in critical condition after Ocado delivery goes right
A Rochdale woman was said to be in a stable condition after being rushed to Rochdale Infirmary this morning. An ambulance was called to...
