Twat

Man who called neighbour Greg for eight years disappointed to learn he’s actually called...

0
Maximilian Fontwhistle has professed to being furious about wasting energy trying to be a good neighbour. "For eight years my neighbour has been calling me Greg."...
Rochdale Riverside

Rochdale unaffected by US Government shutdown confirms Council chief

0
Rochdale - The leader of Rochdale Borough Council, Councillor Allen Brett, has reassured residents of the town that they won't be affected by the...
Writer

It’s too damn hot to write satire says satirist

2
Dick Turnip, writer for the Rochdale Herald, has been left unable to write a single humorous thing commenting on, or parodying the day's news. "It's...
Hideous Bathroom Suite

Couple decide not to get new bathroom after all

9
A couple from Middleton have decided not to get a new bathroom suite after reading in The Daily Mash about a couple who decided...

Playground craze leads Burnley kids to discover deodorant

0
Hundreds of Burnley schoolchildren are now aware of the existence of deodorant thanks to the recent playground craze. The craze involves spraying deodorant from a...

Outrage in Rochdale over proposed Santa suit ban

0
Rochdale religious groups are screaming red white and blue murder over a proposed ban on the traditional Santa suit. This follows the New Year outrage...

Woman in critical condition after Ocado delivery goes right

0
A Rochdale woman was said to be in a stable condition after being rushed to Rochdale Infirmary this morning. An ambulance was called to...
Water Treatment

Lancashire residents to be given counselling as water supply found to be contaminated with...

25
Water company United Utilities has been fined £300,000 after supplying water unfit for human consumption. Nearly a million households in Lancashire were warned they should...
bbq

Twat ruins barbecue with guitar

Reports are coming in that a twat has ruined a perfectly serviceable barbecue after finding an old guitar next to a sofa in the...

Poll reveals public wants good old fashioned political sex scandal

0
A Herald survey reveals that public perception of politicians lean towards disappointment at them not having any juicy sex scandals anymore.  Carried out at the...

Rochdale couple speak of leaving embarassing ‘Jacob Rees-Mogg’ phase

0
Two grandparents from Rochdale have spoken about emerging from the embarrassing 'Jacob Reees-Mogg' phase of their life. Orla Board told us, "We'll look back at...

UK’s 2nd most popular boys name is currently Boaty McBoatface

0
Latest figures released on the governments website www.gov.co.uk reveal the good old British sense of humour is alive and well as almost unbelievably Boaty...

Archbishops To Sue Builders Over Health and Safety Gone Mad

0
A group of five Archbishops of Canterbury are to sue the building firm Klumsi 'n Fook.  Klumsi 'n Fook, were carrying out renovation works on...

Black death condemned for being racist

0
Traditional remedies, like bleeding and mercury, have proved ineffective. Complementary therapists have suggested vaccination, but have been dismissed by mothers who prefer their infants to die naturally rather than to become autistic church goers.
Hippies Hippy

Sheffield Tree Protestors Charged With Doing Nothing Illegal Are Freed

0
Two lovely blokes who were recently charged with doing absolutely nothing illegal by the dark forces of South Yorkshire police and Sheffield Council were...

Rochdale Toddler Softplay Centre to rebrand as Dante’s Seventh Circle of Hell

It's rumoured the world famous café and toddler soft play centre Tumble Tots in Rochdale will shortly be rebranding as Dante's Seventh Circle of...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts