NewsThump

Berners-Lee quits Internet following Rochdale Herald “Row with Linda”

0
The creator of the World Wide Web has today declared that he officially "cannot be arsed" with the Internet anymore.  This comes after the revelation...
Trump Flag

I’ve just made a life size jelly of Donald Trump, I fear I may...

17
“You have to send help.” Dr Thump implored the emergency operator. “If this jelly gets out of my fridge there is no telling what it will do. It might start a nuclear war or worse.”

Put a top on, you’re not Poldark man told.

0
A Rochdale man has been told to put a top on whilst he does the gardening as he's in no danger of ever being...
Man Reading Menu

Man pretending to understand the wine list

A man is trying his very hardest to look like he understands the wine list in a restaurant. Steve Dickinson was handed the wine list...
bbq

Twat ruins barbecue with guitar

Reports are coming in that a twat has ruined a perfectly serviceable barbecue after finding an old guitar next to a sofa in the...

Man arrested masturbating outside Primark not Simon Danczuk

2
Rumours were circulating around the editorial bunker yesterday that the man arrested for masturbating outside of Primark was local pornography enthusiast Simon Danczuk. Despite getting...

Christmas Miracle declared after BMW driver regains sight after parking in disabled spots

0
A Christmas Miracle has been declared after a disabled man was completely cured after parking his BMW across two handicapped parking bays at Rochdale Waitrose.

Archbishops To Sue Builders Over Health and Safety Gone Mad

0
A group of five Archbishops of Canterbury are to sue the building firm Klumsi 'n Fook.  Klumsi 'n Fook, were carrying out renovation works on...

Middle aged man pulls off the double denim look

0
A middle aged man from Halifax has done the impossible and pulled off the double denim look. Glenn Clarke, 53, from Bury in Lancashire, a...

EXCLUSIVE: PIPPA MIDDLETON TOPLESS PHOTOS BREAK INTERNET

0
Still recovering from the profound damage caused by that picture of Kim Kardashian's arse a while back, the Interweb was dealt yet another bitter...

Rochdale Man breaks record for Most Conspiracies Believed

7
Local man, Kelvin Pastie, 31, an unemployed something or the other, believes he is one of the only people in the world to believe...

Transfer News: Surprise deal Rochdale – Man Utd

0
Transfer News: In a shock late move, minnows Rochdale have thrashed out a deal with giants Manchester United. As this weekend brought an end to...

Keith Vaz in hiding after wife tells him she’s “fine”

0
The whereabouts of Keith Vaz remain a mystery this morning after rumours emerged that he fled the country following a conversation with his wife...

Man in his 30’s caught using Snapchat

0
32 year old office worker Damian Green from Middleton has admitted using snapchat in a desperate attempt to look "cool" and "down with the...

It is too soon to spoon say Northern Rail commuters

0
Northern Rail commuters have confirmed that the length of time it takes to get to work is definitely too soon to spoon. 28 year old...
Angry Man

Satirists give masterclass in social media relations.

0
It seems that our writers are on form today.  One of our articles has apparently upset a section of our readers more than usual,...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts