World hunger solved after Jeremy Corbyn urinates on field
World hunger has been declared over after Jeremy Corbyn urinated on a field just outside Rochdale.
One aide told us, "Jeremy was returning from one...
Rochdale council ban nativity costumes except for Muslims
The education department in Rochdale county council has issued a blanket memo to all schools for "insensitive fancy dress" for nativity plays.
Rochdale tourists furious as they’re falsely sold ‘Zombie Experience’
We were furious - Clive Gulliver told us. Clive Gulliver and his wife Amanda were visiting the historic town as there was no where...
Rochdale trolley collector quits job, anaesthetises pigeon and cuts off let to pursue career...
A Rochdale man has today spoken exclusively to the Herald about his short-lived career as a pirate.
Captain Lidl Beard had been working as a...
Racists Shocked To Learn Arabic Words Have English Translations
Racists up and down the country have been shocked to learn that certain Arabic words like “Allah” and “Halal” actually translate into regular English...
Rochdale Bypass Approved
The rest of the UK today approved a bypass scheme for Rochdale. Using an EU grant while it is still available, the plan entails...
Brexit Deal Threatens Iconic Rochdale Signpost
One of Rochdale's most iconic landmarks, the Welcome to Rochdale; Arsehole of Europe' signpost, has come under threat as Britain gears up for leaving...
Hipster admits it is “exhausting” being a tool 24/7
Every now and then a new fad will infect society and be scoffed at by decent people, until it fades away into the abyss,...
Suspicious package that led to Burnley hospital evacuation identified as basket of fruit
A 'suspicious package' that led to the evacuation of Burnley General Hospital earlier today has been identified as a basket of fruit, according to...
Local Nun in record attempt to raise the roof
A local Nun from Sacred Heart Church in Rochdale could soon become famous for a world record attempt if, with the help of The...
PARENT’S FURY AT COMPULSORY ARABIC LESSONS AT ROCHDALE PRIMARY SCHOOL
Parents are furious about Rochdale Primary School's decision to force children to learn Arabic symbols in Maths lessons.
Many parents believe that forcing their children...
Family dog doesn’t understand why you reward your children with food
Malcolm, an inner city border collie, has spoken exclusively to the Rochdale Herald and explained he does not understand why the children in his...
3rd Day of Sunshine sees Hose Pipe Bans Across UK
As the heatwave currently hitting the UK enters its third day water companies across Britain have enforced hose pipe bans once again.
Despite months of...
OFSTED Chair in hot water over Rochdale “toilet block” comments?
Ofsted chairman and former complete banker David W Hoare is in hot water again after, according to our anonymous source, allegedly describing our beloved...
The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Simon Danczuk
It's been a fairly typical week for Rochdale's "MP" after he found himself at the centre of another embarrassing shit storm.
In another in a...
Smug Husband packs Christmas shop into fridge
A smug father of two from Bolton has taken the plaudits of his close friends and family as he managed to pack away all...
