Vladimir

Plucky underdog wins Russian Presidential election against all odds

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Vladimir 'Don't call this a comeback, I've been here before' Putin has surprised not only the people but himself by winning the race to...

Salisbury poisoning suspect revealed to be elderly arcade owner from Scooby Doo

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A man who is suspected of poisoning Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal has had his real identity revealed by a group calling itself Mystery...
Putin

Vladimir Putin wins Great Russian Bake-off after other contestants fall ill

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Vladimir Putin has won the Russian version of Celebrity Great British Bake-off after all the other contestants sadly died in tragic but mysterious circumstances. Mr...
Missiles flying into sky

Russia to shoot down all planes in Syrian airspace, including their own

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This morning Russia released an announcement stating that any and all aircraft entering Syrian airspace will be immediately shot down without warning.   This, apparently,...
Pathologist

Not being liked by Vladimir Putin IS natural causes, confirms coroner

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The UK police have admitted that perhaps they had jumped to a hasty conclusion after coroners concluded that a Russian businessman who strangled himself...

Russia urges foreign powers not to meddle in their U.K. elections

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The Russian Government has urged all nations to refrain from interfering in its UK elections. A spokesman told us, "We are very worried about other...

Putin starts worrying that he might be a dick

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Russian President Vladimir Putin has reportedly started worrying that he might actually be a bit of a dick. Sources close to Putin have revealed that...
Top Secret

Russian-branded Emperor’s new memo wallets causing security concerns

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Two mysterious Russian stationery salesmen are coming under scrutiny tonight as memo wallets they supplied to government departments may not be all they are...

We always go on holiday to visit housing estates, say Russian poisoning suspects

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2 Russians who are suspected to have poisoned Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal have told Russia Today that they always go on holiday and...
Putin Appraisal

Putin gives Trump “requires improvement” rating during annual appraisal meeting

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Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin have sought to deny allegations that President Trump has been awarded a, "requires improvement" rating during his first one...

Putin joins America in suffering from Trumpgret

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Relations between the US and the Russian Federation have deteriorated since Trump became president, says Vladimir Putin. "Listen, sweetie dahling, I thought rigging the elections...
Boris Johnson

Britain threatens Russia with visit from Boris Johnson

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There were extraordinary scenes in Parliament today as Boris Johnson spoke about the suspected poisoning of Sergei Skripal. Mr Johnson said, "If Russian involvement is...
Trump

Trump says he misspoke when he said Stalin was an excellent strong leader

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Donald Trump has said that he misspoke when he described Joseph Stalin as an excellent strong leader. Trump was replying to reporters who sought clarification...

Putin admits attack on Skripal start of ‘War on Dubstep’

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After repeated denials of involvement in the Skripal affair, Vladimir Putin has finally been moved to admit it was a deliberate attack. Putin...

UKIP leader calls for Theresa May to resign

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UKIP's leader, Vladimir Putin has called on Theresa May to call a General Election to ensure a Government is elected that will push Brexit...
Julian Assange

Julian Assange wins FSB employee of the month

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Julian Assange has explained that he is happy to be awarded FSB's employee of the month for July award. The Russian secret service organisation said...

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