We always go on holiday to visit housing estates, say Russian poisoning suspects

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2 Russians who are suspected to have poisoned Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal have told Russia Today that they always go on holiday and...

UKIP leader calls for Theresa May to resign

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UKIP's leader, Vladimir Putin has called on Theresa May to call a General Election to ensure a Government is elected that will push Brexit...
Sergei Lavrov

Sergei Lavrov Trump’s ‘Top Choice’ for new FBI Director

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Sources within the Trump administration have downplayed rumours that Russian diplomat Sergei Lavrov is in the running to become the next Director of the...

Trump presidency result of Putin prank phone call

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Russian President and superstar house elf, Vladimir Putin, has revealed that the whole Trump/Russia thing is a prank that went too far. "Trump come to...

Russia urges foreign powers not to meddle in their U.K. elections

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The Russian Government has urged all nations to refrain from interfering in its UK elections. A spokesman told us, "We are very worried about other...
Vladimir

Plucky underdog wins Russian Presidential election against all odds

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Vladimir 'Don't call this a comeback, I've been here before' Putin has surprised not only the people but himself by winning the race to...

Salisbury poisoning suspect revealed to be elderly arcade owner from Scooby Doo

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A man who is suspected of poisoning Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal has had his real identity revealed by a group calling itself Mystery...

Putin joins America in suffering from Trumpgret

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Relations between the US and the Russian Federation have deteriorated since Trump became president, says Vladimir Putin. "Listen, sweetie dahling, I thought rigging the elections...
Boris Johnson

Britain threatens Russia with visit from Boris Johnson

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There were extraordinary scenes in Parliament today as Boris Johnson spoke about the suspected poisoning of Sergei Skripal. Mr Johnson said, "If Russian involvement is...
Putin White Denim

Putin to sing ‘This land is my land’ at Eurovision tonight

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Russia today announced suprise plans to enter the Eurovision song contest tonight. The Russian entry is to be sung by Vladimir Putin and is entitled "This land...
Chernobyl

Chernobyl rejects proposal to twin towns with Rochdale

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The Ukrainian town of Chernobyl has rejected a proposal to twin with Rochdale, a spokesman for Rochdale council confirmed to the Herald. The town...
Missiles flying into sky

Russia to shoot down all planes in Syrian airspace, including their own

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This morning Russia released an announcement stating that any and all aircraft entering Syrian airspace will be immediately shot down without warning.   This, apparently,...
Putin

Vladimir Putin wins Great Russian Bake-off after other contestants fall ill

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Vladimir Putin has won the Russian version of Celebrity Great British Bake-off after all the other contestants sadly died in tragic but mysterious circumstances. Mr...
Putin 2

Russian presidential candidates have families safely returned in wake of Putin’s re-election

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The families of all seven Russian Presidential candidates have been returned safely after the totally unexpected landslide victory for Vladimir Putin. Today Vladimir Putin has...
Farage in Russian hat

Nigel farage to accept Russian Government lifetime achievement award in person

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Nigel Farage MP (just kidding) is alleged to be thrilled at being awarded the Russian Government's lifetime achievement award. Zoya Feedosev, Russian envoy to...

Putin starts worrying that he might be a dick

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Russian President Vladimir Putin has reportedly started worrying that he might actually be a bit of a dick. Sources close to Putin have revealed that...

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