Santa

Scandinavian ‘Too Drunk To Stand’ Following Drunk-Sleighing Arrest

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Rochdale magistrates heard how a visitor from Lapland, Mr Nicholas Saint (1,747) created havoc in Rochdale with his erratic control over his team of excitable reindeer pulling a bright red sleigh.
Gun held in front of American flag

Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans

2
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...

Sean Spicer announces Foetuses included in Trump Travel Ban

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Within the last hour the White House has announced plans to extend its controversial travel ban to unborn foetuses.  Trump’s Press Secretary, Sean Spicer, confirmed that the...
Trump Toilet Seat

President Trump ‘leaves toilet seat up’ claims explosive new book

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Washington has been shocked by a controversial new book which claims that, on occasion, President Trump forgets to put the toilet seat down. The...

William and Kate To Tour North Korea

Prince William and Kate Middleton are to take a break from producing sovereigns for the Royal Mint and tour North Korea. Foreign Secretary Boris...
Geert Wilders

World “back on track” after Dutch non-Nazi gets 20% of the vote

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World leaders have rushed to hail the Dutch general election as the turning point in the history of civilisation. With the rising tide of...

Trump aide sacked after misspelt memo advised him to secure the “rapist vote”

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It emerged that a senior aide has been dismissed after a spelling mistake caused a schism in Presidential campaign.
Donald Trump

Too soon since last mass shooting and not long enough before next one to...

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting in a bar in Ohio that has claimed the lives of at least 9 people The White...

President Trump to ‘grab May by the pussy’

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Donald Trump may touch the UK prime minister's vagina in their first private meeting, the president has tweeted. The straw-haired misogynist wrote, "Excited to meet...

Italians face criticism over construction. 

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The Italian government had come under severe criticism today for the standards of its building construction in the 1600's. This comes in the wake...
Donald Trump

I will sue my victims says Donald Trump

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Donald Trump has vowed to track down and sue all of his victims after the presidential elections.

Donald Trump’s staff installs 400 extra red buttons to “delay the inevitable”

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The fate of the billions of people could lie in the hands and minds of these two, often unpredictable leaders, which is a concern for many.
Sea Wall

Trump announces plan for sea wall to keep out foreign storms

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Donald Trump has unveiled his latest scheme to “make America great again” - a huge wall along the entire coast to keep out hurricanes,...
Donald Genius Trump

Trump awards Trump Imaginary Medal of Honor for imaginary heroics

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President of the actually terrific US, Donald Trump, is to reward his own bravery with a special medal, the Purple Cheeseburger, after his courage...
World surprised to learn that Thailand is torturing pretty much everybody

World shocked Thailand torturing political prisoners

The world was rocked to the core today after an Amnesty International report revealed that Thailand's military junta, otherwise known as "the government", tortures...
Golf Resort

Trump ends feud with North Korea after golf resort deal agreed

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The world has been glued to the news whenever Donald Trump makes an announcement regarding the bitter rivalry with North Korea. As we have...

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