Texas commemorates first mass shooting by giving students guns to take to school
To celebrate the 50th anniversary of the world's inaugural mass shooting event at the University of Austin in Texas law makers have passed a...
FBI reveals to Trump evidence of a golf course at Chernobyl
The FBI have allegedly revealed the location of a secret golf course in Chernobyl to Donald Trump today.
One FBI spokesman said, "POTATUS was on...
Salisbury poisoning suspect revealed to be elderly arcade owner from Scooby Doo
A man who is suspected of poisoning Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal has had his real identity revealed by a group calling itself Mystery...
Trump turns down White House sexual harassment course because ‘I’m already pretty good at...
News broke this morning that Donald Trump has turned down an offer from the White House human resources department to attend a special course...
Massive weapon condemns massive weapon’s massive weapon test
A massive weapon took to social media this morning to condemn the massive weapon test of another massive weapon.
It's unclear at this point who...
Trump rushed to John Hopkins with severe burns
Donald Trump is said to be in a stable but critical condition this morning after being rushed to hospital suffering from self inflicted third...
Teaching children to Zig Zag best way to avoid school shooting fatalities, say NRA
In the wake of yet another mass school shooting in the USA the National Rifle Association have suggested that the tragedy could have been...
Trump supporter accidentally extinguishes trainers with own tears
"Wild" Bill Board, an American protesting at an advert for trainers was unable to get his shoes to burn today because the tears he...
Sinn Fein election observer confirms Venezuelan blowjobs, cocaine and elections are best in world
"I've had my share of blowjobs," confirms Jarry Odoms, mouthpiece of Sinn Fein. "But nobody does erections, I mean elections, like the Venezuelans. Now...
Trump attends Paris Armistice commemoration after hearing there is a golf course nearby
POTATUS has attended an Armistice commemoration in Paris a day after demonstrating the sort of spirit that has earned him the nickname, Cadet Bone...
Paul Nuttall admits to FBI he passed US nuclear secrets to Russia
Paul Nuttall has sensationally admitted to the FBI that he passed US military secrets to Russia.
In a statement to the FBI Mr Nuttall admitted delivering...
Putin admits attack on Skripal start of ‘War on Dubstep’
After repeated denials of involvement in the Skripal affair, Vladimir Putin has finally been moved to admit it was a deliberate attack.
Putin...
EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain
The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...
Trump says he didn’t sexually assault 3.52 billion other women
Bewigged bouffant buffoon, Donald J. Trump, an actual potential president, made the claim at his latest rally.
The tiny handed eater of souls came under...
Trump and Putin fail to beat each other in two hour long rock, paper,...
Presidents Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin met face to face for the first time in public yesterday and went for each other in a...
Donald Trump denies allegations he has rigged erections
The allegation was made by Anthony "Fandango" Scaramucci following his removal from post.
The President's former tiny-right-hand man lashed out indiscriminately at his former...


















































