US Police Report Record Start to Season After “Glorious Twelfth”
US Police are have reported a record start to the Season after the traditional start to the Civilian Shooting Season with Tulsa leading the...
Trump ecstatic at 99% approval rating from alt-right protesters
Speaking about the rally on Saturday Trump is alleged to have said, "There sure was a lot of people there. The press will say it was about 200 people. It looked about 45,000. That set a record. They all set a record. Obama never got that many alt-right supporters. They came because of me and I'm proud of that. It's my greatest achievement as President so far."
Russian Government Denies Hacking Rochdale Herald
The Russian Government has reacted angrily towards allegations that it was responsible for hacking UK news site The Rochdale Herald. The Herald, which is...
Chilcot stuns world with news that Pope is catholic
Sir John Chilcot has stunned the world by stating again that the Pope is catholic and so it seems is Britain's greatest wartime leader...
Michael Moore to release new ‘Bowling for Bowling Green’ documentary
The renowned liberal film maker made the announcement on his Facebook page earlier today, stating;
"After the huge success of my 2002 film, Bowling for...
Modern Day Presidential latest euphemism for complete and utter numpty, say linguists
As Humpty Dumpty said, "When I use a word, it means whatever I want it to mean." Clearly in a world of self-reductible horseshit,...
President Trump’s hairpiece flown over Korean peninsula in B-1 bomber
It was reported this evening that President Donald Trump’s golden hairpiece has been flown over the Korean peninsula in a B-1 Bomber as a...
White House admits Trump thought Korean War was fought in Star Trek
The White House has apparently confirmed that POTATUS, Donald Trump, thought the Korean War was a war fought in the 1970's in Star Trek.
The...
Plucky underdog wins Russian Presidential election against all odds
Vladimir 'Don't call this a comeback, I've been here before' Putin has surprised not only the people but himself by winning the race to...
May to wear codpiece and alpha male pig hormone for Trump meeting
In a bid to protect from pussy grabbing and give the impression of a large penis and aura of dominance, Theresa May will today...
Heroic arsonist awarded posthumous bravery medal for putting out fire
A heroic self-admitted arsonist in Northern Ireland has been awarded a posthumous medal for bravery after spending half a lifetime putting out suspicious looking...
We tried democracy and frankly it’s not for us, Spanish government tells voters
The Prime Minister of Spain has told voters that democracy isn't for them and it refuses to recognise the result of a referendum on...
Man-child chickens out of UK visit because people said mean things about him
Man-child and completely stable genius Donald Trump has reportedly cancelled his planned visit to the UK next month, according to the White House.
Trump was...
Trump and Kim Jong Un to meet on Love Island
A rearranged summit between Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un will take place on Love Island.
The news comes amid speculation that a high ranking...
Brexiter fury as Europe steals patented British Divide and Conquer negotiating strategy
Brexiters across this once mighty country were swearing into their fry ups this morning with the discovery the EU has a negotiating strategy.
"It's just...
Westboro Baptist Churchgoers saddened by news that God actually hates FAQ’s
Congregation of famously homophobic church disheartened to learn that The Almighty is 'proper hacked off with being asked the same dumb shit over and...


















































