Donald Trump

White House desperately concealing news of Twitter character increase from Trump

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The twittersphere is in overdrive this morning with millions of users tweeting out their hope that the White House is able to conceal the...
Trump Walking

Trump to visit Texas just as soon as the golf courses have been reopened

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Donald Trump has announced he intends to visit areas of Texas affected by flooding just as soon as the cleaning operation on Texan golf...
Donald Trump DNA

Donald Trump: DNA test finds ‘strong evidence’ of human DNA

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US President Donald Trump has revealed that a DNA test shows "strong evidence" that he is distantly related to human beings. He took the test...
Four Horsemen

Four horsemen of the modern apocalypse revealed to be Fire, Fury, Sad and Fake

In a move designed to drag them kicking and screaming into the new era, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are to be retired...

UN tells Goodwill Ambassador to fuck off

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After a record low of zero days in the job, the new UN Ambassador, whose job it would've been to generally spread love and...

Trump’s Wall to be Made Out of Thoughts and Prayers

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The latest twist in the ongoing farcical shitshow that is the US President's attempt to build an completely pointless wall simply because he said...
Mount Rushmore

Trump vows to chisel four ‘losers’ off Mount Rushmore

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President Trump has vowed to have the images of four of his predecessors chiselled off Mount Rushmore, describing them as ‘total losers’. In a...

Putin joins America in suffering from Trumpgret

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Relations between the US and the Russian Federation have deteriorated since Trump became president, says Vladimir Putin. "Listen, sweetie dahling, I thought rigging the elections...
Lego logo

Lego let go of Trump

It has been revealed this week that toy manufacturing giants Lego will not produce a figure of president elect Donald Trump. Many have regarded this...

Donald’s diddy digits dodge draft

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As the smokescreen around Donald Trump's draft dodging tactics intensifies The Rochdale Herald has uncovered startling new evidence. The story currently being spun is that...

Wright brothers blamed for rise in immigration

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Criticism has been placed upon two American inventors for the dramatic rise in immigration, it has been confirmed. Brothers Orville and Wilbur Wright, who are...
Golf Resort

Trump ends feud with North Korea after golf resort deal agreed

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The world has been glued to the news whenever Donald Trump makes an announcement regarding the bitter rivalry with North Korea. As we have...

For the last time, Trump is nothing like Hitler. Hitler fought in a...

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If Hitler had practiced golf as much as Trump, maybe he'd have made it out of the bunker Donald J. Trump, the four times decorated...

I don’t need no intelligence, I got this far without none says Trump

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Donald Trump confounded satirists again this week after sensationally declaring that he doesn't need intelligence as he has managed to get this far without it.

US announces National Police Shooting League

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Excitement is mounting in the United States ahead of the launch of the National Police Shooting League. 20,000 law enforcement agencies will be competing for...
Tony Montana

Tony Montana to become new White House communications director

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Tony Montana is set to become White House communications director following the sacking of Anthony Scaramucci today. Mr Montana was last seen toting M16A1 guns...

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