Area 51 to Close Aliens Expelled – Trump Conversation with Galactic Emperor ‘Worst...
Donald Trump has ordered the closure of Area 51 and the immediate expulsion of all aliens.
During a turbulent conversation with The Galactic Emperor, which...
White House confirms all its press staff do coke
The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke.
The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...
Trump to celebrate Father’s Day by bathing in the tears of abducted child immigrants
US President Donald Trump is to celebrate his second Father's Day in the White House by having a bath filled with the tears of...
David Brent to sing Equality Street at Trump Inauguration
Following the shock withdrawal of Bruce Springsteen tribute band the B-Street Band from the Trump Inauguration David Brent is thrilled to announce that his band Foregone Conclusion have agreed terms to perform.
Bands line up to celebrate Trump’s impeachment
The Rochdale Herald can exclusively reveal the star studded line up already in place for celebrating the impeachment of Donald Trump, expected to take...
Rochdale man released from US prison after Trump repeals ‘Merry Christmas’ ban
A Rochdale couple have told the Herald that their son's release from jail in America is the best present they could have hoped for.
Percy...
Trump sues porn star for breaching confidentiality agreement about affair he claims not to...
Lawyers for the actual President of the United States of America are seeking $20 million in damages from a porn star who he says...
Theresa May summons devil to discuss Syria
The prime minister has summoned the devil to discuss the government's response to a suspected chemical weapons attack in Syria.
They are expected to discuss...
Belgian brewers threaten budget busting Brexit blackmail beer price boost
The world’s biggest beer company, Belgium based Anheuser-Busch Inbev warned Monday that the drop in value of Sterling in the wake of the UK's...
Am I Mexican? Ask Trump voters after he says USA will pay for Wall
The recently announced decision that the wall between Mexico and the USA will be built using American taxpayers money under a piece of legislation...
RSPCA desperately seeking forever homes for 45 bunnies rescued from ‘Bunny Farm’ in California
A RSPCA spokesman in Nantwich is urgently looking for 45 'new residents rescued from what he described as 'the biggest bunny farm they had...
Over-exaggerating totally different to lying your arse off
Swimmer and US gold medal winning bullshitter, Ryan Lochte, has sort of apologised for making things up.
The lying git said that his description of...
I’m nothing like Steve Bannon – says Darth Vader
Darth Vader took to Twitter today to distance himself from "that evil bastard" Steve Bannon after Bannon compared himself to Darth Vader, Thomas Cromwell, Dick Cheney and Satan.
Russian-branded Emperor’s new memo wallets causing security concerns
Two mysterious Russian stationery salesmen are coming under scrutiny tonight as memo wallets they supplied to government departments may not be all they are...
CIA to dumb down intelligence briefings
The U.S. Director of National Intelligence (DNI) Dan Coats, announced on Sunday that they will be cutting down the president’s daily intelligence briefings to a maximum...
American lawmakers to submerge Donald Trump in barrel of water to see if he...
It was announced today via The USA news site that Donald Trump will be immersed in a barrel of water to see if he...
