RAF Typhoon

What could possibly go wrong, asks West

Western leaders have suggested that nothing could possibly go wrong by attacking Syria and this time will definitely be different to Iraq, Afghanistan and...
Donald Trump

President Trump’s hairpiece flown over Korean peninsula in B-1 bomber

1
It was reported this evening that President Donald Trump’s golden hairpiece has been flown over the Korean peninsula in a B-1 Bomber as a...
Sandy Hook

We’re doing just fine says President of country whose hobbies include shooting children at...

0
The so-called President of a country that lists shooting children at school amongst its most popular hobbies has told the UK Prime Minster to...

Man-child chickens out of UK visit because people said mean things about him

0
Man-child and completely stable genius Donald Trump has reportedly cancelled his planned visit to the UK next month, according to the White House. Trump was...
Brexiter

Brexiter fury as Europe steals patented British Divide and Conquer negotiating strategy

0
Brexiters across this once mighty country were swearing into their fry ups this morning with the discovery the EU has a negotiating strategy. "It's just...
Donald Trump

All options on table including surprise missile attack on Tuesday, Trump tells Syria on...

0
Actual real-life president of the United States of America Donald Trump has tweeted that Russia and Syria should get smart and expect a surprise...

Putin joins America in suffering from Trumpgret

0
Relations between the US and the Russian Federation have deteriorated since Trump became president, says Vladimir Putin. "Listen, sweetie dahling, I thought rigging the elections...

UN tells Goodwill Ambassador to fuck off

1
After a record low of zero days in the job, the new UN Ambassador, whose job it would've been to generally spread love and...

Trump presidency result of Putin prank phone call

0
Russian President and superstar house elf, Vladimir Putin, has revealed that the whole Trump/Russia thing is a prank that went too far. "Trump come to...

Trump insists the audience for his resignation speech will be bigger than Sean Spicers

19
Donald Trump has insisted that the audience for Sean Spicers resignation speech will be miniscule compared to his own. Trump tweeted that, "Spicer was a...
Kim Jong-un

Russia and China back UN call for Kim Jong Un to be sent to...

10
The UN has finally received the backing of both Mummy and Daddy as Russia and China backed the call for serious punishment to be...
Geert Wilders

World “back on track” after Dutch non-Nazi gets 20% of the vote

0
World leaders have rushed to hail the Dutch general election as the turning point in the history of civilisation. With the rising tide of...
Sea Wall

Trump announces plan for sea wall to keep out foreign storms

14
Donald Trump has unveiled his latest scheme to “make America great again” - a huge wall along the entire coast to keep out hurricanes,...
Donald Genius Trump

Trump awards Trump Imaginary Medal of Honor for imaginary heroics

0
President of the actually terrific US, Donald Trump, is to reward his own bravery with a special medal, the Purple Cheeseburger, after his courage...
American Police

Shock as a US Police Department goes a whole day without shooting somebody

There was consternation across the US yesterday after the police department in Bumshart Nebrahoma went a whole day without shooting an unarmed black civilian. Heavily...

I don’t make mistakes says man who accidentally got himself elected President

0
A giant orange man child who accidentally got himself elected President of the United States during a publicity stunt for his gaudy golf course business announced live on television that he doesn't make mistakes, immediately before making a mistake.

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