Roy Moore ordered to pay if he wants another go after coming in a...
The Alabama Secretary of State has told Judge Roy Moore that he will have to finance any recount of the Senate seat vote.
John Merrill...
English All Xenophobic Wankers – says Nicola Sturgeon without Hint of Irony
Nicola Sturgeon will today claim that “Godless English Imperial filth” are using Brexit as a “licence for xenophobia” and that the English “are secretly working to not be considered Wankers by absolutely everyone.”
Sweden not rocked by terrorist incident
Hundreds of Swedes were not killed on Friday night by a terrorist attack. A suicide bomber, described by police as non-existent, failed to detonate explosives in a crowded shopping centre, or, indeed, anywhere else.
Trump’s presidency is ‘metaphorical, not literal’, says Spicer
Following unsubstantiated wiretapping allegations, president Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, has argued that Trump is the metaphorical president and leader of the free world,...
David Brent to sing Equality Street at Trump Inauguration
Following the shock withdrawal of Bruce Springsteen tribute band the B-Street Band from the Trump Inauguration David Brent is thrilled to announce that his band Foregone Conclusion have agreed terms to perform.
Picture yourself in their shoes
A picture of Omran Daqneesh, the five year old boy who was pulled from the rubble that used to be his home in Aleppo,...
Bands line up to celebrate Trump’s impeachment
The Rochdale Herald can exclusively reveal the star studded line up already in place for celebrating the impeachment of Donald Trump, expected to take...
Putin starts worrying that he might be a dick
Russian President Vladimir Putin has reportedly started worrying that he might actually be a bit of a dick.
Sources close to Putin have revealed that...
Heavily armed men in masks carrying clubs burn homes in Northern France
A large group of heavily armed men carrying clubs and guns attacked and burned the homes of several thousand people in Northern France yesterday...
People of Aleppo not quite white enough
European leaders have come together to stress how upset they are that the people of Aleppo have ever so slightly funny coloured skin and...
Condoms are a commie liberal plot to give everybody AIDS according to Trump VP
Revelations of comments made by Donald Trump's running mate, the 'Caucasian Executioner of Indiana', Mike Pence show that Governor Pence might not know how...
Half of Trump Supporters Gullible Obese Idiots and the other Half deplorable Racist A-holes...
In the wake of the "scandal" surrounding Hillary Clinton's comments describing half of Trump supporters as a "basket of deplorables", The Rochdale Herald commissioned...
Am I Mexican? Ask Trump voters after he says USA will pay for Wall
The recently announced decision that the wall between Mexico and the USA will be built using American taxpayers money under a piece of legislation...
Trump travel ban extends to Narnia
President Donald Trump last night signed an Executive Order adding Narnia to the travel ban and immediately excluding "followers of Aslan" from entering the...
Fire at Trump Tower definitely not Donald Trump Jr burning Russia dossier, confirms Donald...
New York - There has been more fire and fury today as a blaze at the top of Trump Tower in New York left...
Trump in hiding as NRA call for curb ‘on rapid fire tools’
DONALD TRUMP is believed to be in hiding tonight after the National Rifle Association called for a clamp-down on “rapid fire tools”.
This has been...
