Farage takes on Eurovision

In a shock move today, the rubber faced, racist, people's champion Nigel Farage has announced his intentions to represent Great Britain in next year's...
Trump

Boy Scouts of America deny meeting Donald Trump

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The Boy Scouts of America have issued a statement denying meeting Donald Trump. “It never happened. It's fake news folks.” The statement begins. “Only a sick,...
Donald Trump

Trump to play 25 rounds of golf in honour of Texan dead

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Donald Trump has defended a decision to play 25 rounds of golf in Japan saying it's in honour of the dead in Texas. The gesture...
International Thundercunt

Trump celebrates success of travel ban as many developed countries join voluntarily

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President Donald Trump, perhaps the funniest American president since the last republican one, has hailed the success of his travel ban after many developed...

President Trump to wear eclipse glasses when viewing the news to protect his thin...

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It was announced today via Twitter that President Trump will now wear eclipse glasses when viewing the news in order to protect his thin...

We’re going to build a wall and America is going to pay for it...

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There was outrage across the United States this afternoon after the President of Mexico said "fuck this shit" and vowed to close the border...
FBI Directors till Christmas

Only two FBI directors until Christmas

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Christmas is coming, the POTUS is getting fat. Please to put a penny in the old man's retirement fund. Following the latest Trumptastrophy in Alabama,...
Trump

Man with record of making unproveable and unsubstantiated claims claims something unproveable and unsubstantiated

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Serial unproveable and unsubstantiated claim maker Anthony Gilberthorpe, 54, has come to the defence of serial gropist Donald Trump.

Liam Fox Seeks Trade Deal With ISIS

International Trade Secretary Liam Fox will fly into Iraq later today in the hope of securing a trade deal with the so-called 'Islamic State'. Fox...
Putin Tillerson

Putin sacks head of US State Department Rex Tillerson

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WASHINGTON - The leader of the United States, President Vladimir Putin, announced Tuesday morning that he had fired his Secretary State Rex Tillerson and...
Donald Trump

Trump attends Paris Armistice commemoration after hearing there is a golf course nearby

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POTATUS has attended an Armistice commemoration in Paris a day after demonstrating the sort of spirit that has earned him the nickname, Cadet Bone...
Baby

Adolf tops list of most popular baby names for boys in USA in 2017

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For the first time in almost fifty years the name Adolf is topping the lists for most popular baby names in the United States...
Executioner with axe

U.S. prepares for Steve Bannon’s execution

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Following an interview in which Steve Bannon compared himself to Tudor-era royal adviser Thomas Cromwell, America is making hasty preparations for the execution of Donald...

Donald Trump Jr upset by chants of ‘lock him up’ from Donald Trump Snr

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Donald Trump Jr has allegedly complained that President Trump keeps chanting 'lock him up' at him. Trump Junior made a complaint to a White House...

Donald Trump believes Nazi flags are adverts for fidget spinners

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The President went on to suggest North Korea would be much safer if it followed the example of America and gave its citizens toys to play with and flags to wave like the patriots in Charlottesville yesterday.

Trump tells California, Cut down all the trees to prevent future forest fires

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POTATUS has announced that if all the trees in California were cut down then there would be no forest fires. POTATUS got the idea after...

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