Trump loses grip on reality, demands to be new Dr Who.

1
US President Donald Trump has called on the BBC to appoint him as the new Dr Who. In a series of tweets at 3am this...

Oh,For f*ck’s Sake Most Commonly Used Phrase Of 2016

0
Oh, for fuck’s sake said everyone this morning, following reports of more people dying at the hands of total arseholes.  After news broke of the...
Scunthorpe

Palestinians Recognise Scunthorpe as Capital of US, Answering Question ‘Who put the ‘Trump’ in...

0
Following the United States decision to recognise Jerusalem as the capital of Israel, the Palestinian authorities have entered into the spirit of things and...
Sean Spicer

White House Press Office denies denying denials of denials denying denials

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The White House Press Office has issued a fresh set of denials denying denials of  denials denying denials. "We knew about Mr Trump's links to...

Toymaker confesses he made Melania Trump to keep Pinocchio company

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A Tuscan toymaker has ended days of speculation by confessing he made a new female doll to keep his infamous, lying, long nosed boy...

Specsavers Official Sponsors Of WWIII

Specsavers has announced it has signed a two-year deal as official sponsors of the forthcoming World War Three, with effect from mid November. The company...

Trump University launches alternative science course

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Donald Trump has announced the launch of a new science course that will be taught at Trump University from September. The course will feature subject matter...
Gun old lady

Why does this keep happening, ask imbeciles who keep selling guns to people who...

0
Fuckwits in America who keep blocking gun control reform have been forced to once again ask the question "why do mass shootings happen over...
Drone

ISIL in talks with Amazon over drone deliveries deal

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An email has surfaced, from an anonymous source claiming to be from within Amazon, which suggests that the international distribution leviathan is in secret...
Trump

Massive weapon condemns massive weapon’s massive weapon test

5
A massive weapon took to social media this morning to condemn the massive weapon test of another massive weapon. It's unclear at this point who...
Sorry Trump

Trump condemns dead soldier for not standing during national anthem

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President Donald Trump has rebuked allegations of inappropriate comments made by the grieving widow of a US soldier today by pointing out her husband...
Alex Jones

Alex Jones discusses the Trump presidency

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Good evening. Today I am speaking to Radio host and Bacofoil and batshit salesman, Alex Jones.  Good afternoon, Alex. How are you feeling after Trump's rather...

Trump to celebrate Father’s Day by bathing in the tears of abducted child immigrants

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US President Donald Trump is to celebrate his second Father's Day in the White House by having a bath filled with the tears of...
International Thundercunt

Donald Trump wins ‘International Thundercunt of the Year Award’ after declaring war on children

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President Donald Trump has been awarded the International Thundercunt of the Year Award following his decision to remove protections for young people brought into...
Christmas

Only 350 High School Shootings left until Christmas

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Children across the United States of America were very excited to learn this morning that it's now officially only 350 school shootings until Christmas. With...

Trump’s presidency is ‘metaphorical, not literal’, says Spicer

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Following unsubstantiated wiretapping allegations, president Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, has argued that Trump is the metaphorical president and leader of the free world,...

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