Catalonia makes a break for Eurovision glory

0
Catalonia today announced a bold step to break out on their own and go for it alone. Not since the 11th century has there...

Police fear French blogger killed in whipped cream accident may have topped herself

39
The international irony reservoir was overflowing this week as news came through that French lifestyle and fitness blogger, Becky Fromage-Burger, was slain in her...

Tim Nice But Dim appointed UK Ambassador to the EU

7
In a surprise move Theresa May has appointed Tim Nice But Dim UK Amabassador to the EU.
Theresa May

Theresa May admits using ‘BREXOMATHICS’ to calculate number of overstaying foreign students

11
"It's so simple, you take a real number and keep doubling it until everyone's eyes light up," explained May pointing out that it worked...
Trial by Combat

Theresa May demands Trial by Combat to avoid EU trade negotiations

Theresa May has taken the unusual decision to demand a trial by combat rather than face the EU over the table at trade negotiations.  She...
Queue

Border Free Travel sounds like a good idea, says Brexit voter who queued four...

31
A Brexit voter who spent four hours queueing in passport control has suggested that maybe border free travel in Europe is a good thing. Jo...
Putin

David Cameron becomes Hero of the Russian Federation

0
The Kremlin announced today that David Cameron is to be recognised as a Hero of the Russian Federation, the highest honour that can be...
Dictionary entry for word "definition"

Revealed! What ‘Brexit’ means.

0
After months of denying that 'Brexit' could be defined in terms of anything other than being 'Brexit', the Government has finally announced what, in...

Wales celebrates after spectacular 2016 Darwin Award victory

15
The population of Wales has been awarded a collective 2016 Darwin Award for its staggering act of self immolation in last year's referendum on...
Santa

Scandinavian ‘Too Drunk To Stand’ Following Drunk-Sleighing Arrest

0
Rochdale magistrates heard how a visitor from Lapland, Mr Nicholas Saint (1,747) created havoc in Rochdale with his erratic control over his team of excitable reindeer pulling a bright red sleigh.
Gibraltar

Downing Street Confirms Gibraltar To Be Closed Down

0
Downing Street has confirmed that Gibraltar is to be closed. With the success of Brexit guaranteeing the ability to launder money in the U.K., at...
Ceuta

Ceuta is nothing like Gibraltar, King Felipe of Spain tells UK without hint of...

8
The Spanish King called for a deal on the status of Gibraltar yesterday. King Felipe VI clarified in no uncertain terms that: “The status of...
Brexiter

Brexiter fury as Europe steals patented British Divide and Conquer negotiating strategy

0
Brexiters across this once mighty country were swearing into their fry ups this morning with the discovery the EU has a negotiating strategy. "It's just...

British expats outraged as boat full of migrants wash up on their Spanish beach

0
Beachgoers were surprised by the sight of dozens of migrants scrambling out of the surf today at the Playa de los Alemanes resort in...

Home Office to open Job Centre and Benefits Office in Migrant Calais Jungle

0
There was outrage in the editorial bunker at The Rochdale Herald after one of the editorial team accidentally read an article in the Telegraph. "It...

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