Macron wants UK to give him head in return for Bayeux tapestry
Monarchists were today outraged by the suggestion by Emmanuel Macron, President of France, that the severed heads of the British royal family would be...
Hammond to Create National Hoard
In advance of Brexit negotiations Phillip Hammond is to bury all of the country's wealth in a hole in the ground.
The hole, believed to...
French Head of Military resigns after Macron cuts £1bn from White Flag Budget
General Pierre de Villiers today sensationally quit as Head of the French Military in a row over cuts to the French White Flag budget.
General...
German families to heat homes using hot air from Donald Trump
German families are to use the hot air that emanates from Donald Trump to heat their homes.
The news was broken by the German Government...
God refuses to put out Notre Dame fire until he gets 100,000 likes =...
The 14th century cathedral has already lost one of its spires and a large section of roof in the blaze after a fire broke...
Merkel Pulls Out of EU Security Council Talks as There’s No German Word for...
Angela Merkel broke off talks with the EU's British Security Commissioner this week that were about the worsening crisis affecting the free movement of people.
No Government is better than a bad Government Italy tells UK
Italian President, Sergio Mattarella has told the UK that having no Government is better than having a bad Government following the Italian people electing to go with...
The ‘Santa Clause’ prevents Article 50 from being triggered experts warn
In a massive blow to the government, German lawyer Rudolph Shnitz has highlighted a clause in section 4 of article 38 dubbed 'The Santa...
NATO leaders issue declaration of unity against Donald Trump
NATO leaders have issued a statement of unity aimed at preserving the alliance against Donald Trump.
One spokesman said, "It may seem strange that we're...
Quackpot fundamentalist and friend of dictators finally canonised by paedophiles
Mother Theresa of Calcutta became Saint Theresa yesterday in a small ceremony in the Vatican. Saint Theresa, who passed through Rochdale on her way...
12th Doctor Who to Run for French Presidency
Peter Capaldi AKA The Doctor has expressed an interest in becoming the French President at the next election. The current Timelord who is also...
Heavily armed men in masks carrying clubs burn homes in Northern France
A large group of heavily armed men carrying clubs and guns attacked and burned the homes of several thousand people in Northern France yesterday...
Angela Merkel to meet Theresa May to tell her to piss off in person
Angela Merkel, the German Chancellor, is due to meet with Theresa May later today to spit in her face and tell her to piss...
Belgian brewers threaten budget busting Brexit blackmail beer price boost
The world’s biggest beer company, Belgium based Anheuser-Busch Inbev warned Monday that the drop in value of Sterling in the wake of the UK's...
Trump hails Polish culture saying “Pole dancers are the best, I’m a huge fan,...
US President Donald Trump Thursday attempted to cement US-Polish relations in a speech delivered in the Polish capital Warsaw on the first day of...
