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Home Office To Issue Migrants With Wearable Documentation

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EU nationals currently living in the UK will require documents confirming their right to remain in the country post-Brexit, the Home Office has announced. Speaking...

Campaign to move Calais Jungle migrant Camp to Southend dubbed inhumane

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Plans to move the makeshift refugee camp in Calais to Southend were quashed today after a cross party committee called the plans inhumane. Refugees from...
Theresa May

Theresa May admits using ‘BREXOMATHICS’ to calculate number of overstaying foreign students

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"It's so simple, you take a real number and keep doubling it until everyone's eyes light up," explained May pointing out that it worked...
Santa

Scandinavian ‘Too Drunk To Stand’ Following Drunk-Sleighing Arrest

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Rochdale magistrates heard how a visitor from Lapland, Mr Nicholas Saint (1,747) created havoc in Rochdale with his erratic control over his team of excitable reindeer pulling a bright red sleigh.
Belgian Beer

Belgian brewers threaten budget busting Brexit blackmail beer price boost

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The world’s biggest beer company, Belgium based Anheuser-Busch Inbev warned Monday that the drop in value of Sterling in the wake of the UK's...

Idiot dies in Karmic Avalanche

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An idiot died in an avalanche of Karma in the town of Teruel in Aragon, Spain, yesterday. Victor Barrio (29), having spent the last 9...

We tried democracy and Franco-ly it’s not for us, Spanish government tells voters

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The Prime Minister of Spain has told voters that democracy isn't for them and it refuses to recognise the result of a referendum on...
Putin

David Cameron becomes Hero of the Russian Federation

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The Kremlin announced today that David Cameron is to be recognised as a Hero of the Russian Federation, the highest honour that can be...
Bomb Squad

May tells Merkel,”This is just a taste of what I’ve got”.

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News reports this morning state that the entire city of Hannover is to be evacuated following the discovery of numerous unexploded WW2 bombs. Apparently, Theresa...
Katie Hopkins

Katie Hopkins killed and eaten by starving migrants

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Mail Online columnist Katie Hopkins' plan to drown migrants attempting to cross the Mediterranean to prevent them coming to the UK has been put...

EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain

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The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...
Dictionary entry for word "definition"

Revealed! What ‘Brexit’ means.

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After months of denying that 'Brexit' could be defined in terms of anything other than being 'Brexit', the Government has finally announced what, in...

Remain campaigners thwarted by import shortage of “I Told You So”s

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Anti-Brexit campaigners are suffering from a shortage of "I Told You So"s, as "Project Fear" rapidly swings into "Operation I Told You So", as...

UK border agency given right to conduct posthumous deportations

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The UK border agency has been given the green light to start deporting the interred remains of people not born in the UK, a...
Angry Man

UK to mobilise army of “social media warriors” to protect Gibraltar

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With no aircraft carriers and military resources already overstretched in Afghanistan, the Ministry of Defence has announced that it is calling up the UK's "third force"...

Hammond to Create National Hoard

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In advance of Brexit negotiations Phillip Hammond is to bury all of the country's wealth in a hole in the ground. The hole, believed to...

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