London’s last affordable plumber shot by poachers
London's last surviving affordable plumber has been killed by poachers in Clapham, according to a conservation group that protects a dwindling group of reliable...
BBC Countryfile Filming Suspended After Presenter Gets Parking Ticket
Filming of cutting edge BBC show Countryfile was dramatically suspended last night after one of the presenters was accused of parking illegally.
Previously well respected...
Northern supermarket to trial hummus
News is breaking that a well-known northern supermarket is to start selling hummus at some stores at some point in 2021.
It is thought that...
Now that passports are blue again I might get one, says 50 year old...
A fifty year old racist fuckwit has told The Rochdale Herald that he is over the moon that passports are now going to be...
SHOCK as England fans vote 52 to 48 to LEAVE the World Cup
There is widespread shock around England today after the English voting public voted 52% to 48% for the England football team to leave the...
Yorkshire driving ban on women to be lifted
The King of Yorkshire, His Majesty Geoffrey Boycott the first, has issued a decree allowing women to drive within the Sovereign state for the...
Chris Grayling wins Turner Prize for dystopian work “Railway Timetable in May”
The Turner Prize committee has announced that this year's prize will be awarded to Chris Grayling for his dystopian work, "Railway Timetable in May".
A...
Burnley Lidl selling Father’s Day Cards in packs of five
With Father's Day fast approaching, supermarkets and stationary stores across the country are displaying cards and gifts for children to give to their father this Sunday. Burnley Lidl has raised a few eyebrows with its five card bundle offer.
Shop selling stuff people don’t buy goes into administration, again
People in Rochdale have been speaking of the shock at discovering HMV has collapsed again. Many thought it had gone bust years ago.
Stan...
Dozens dead after Chris Grayling attempts to make cup of tea
News is coming in this morning of a terrible incident in central London that has left dozens dead and many hundreds horribly wounded.
Eyewitnesses have...
Workman spotted doing some work on the £15BN M62 Roadworks
The bloke who is doing all the work on the £15BN M62 road improvement scheme has been spotted on site for the first time...
Boris Johnson launches ‘Free Robert Mugabe’ campaign
The campaign is headed up by Boris Johnson who is thought to believe that if it's successful he could be the leader of Zanu...
Anger as ‘sexy Anjem Choudary’ costume outsells ‘sexy Tommy Robinson’ costume for first time
There were angry reactions across the UK today after it was revealed that a popular 'slutty Tommy Robinson' Halloween costume has been outsold by...
Hundreds arrested in dawn raids for not wearing a poppy
More than 300 people have been arrested as part of an operation to prevent people who aren’t wearing a poppy to be seen in public today.
Fears grow for BBC Explorer missing in Oldham
The alarm was raised today after BBC documentary maker and explorer Professor Robert Falcon failed to emerge from Oldham after missing his rendezvous with...
US celebrates after number of days so far this year overtakes number of mass...
Americans across America are celebrating the fact that for the first time since the invention of calendars there have been more days in the...
