Queen and Philip

The Queen asks Merkel to form a government

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Her Majesty the Queen is expected to travel to Berlin later today to ask German Chancellor Angela Merkel to form a government for the...
The Queen

Queen announces Prince Harry will become King of the USA following wedding to Meghan...

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The Queen has announced that she exercise her right to crown Prince Harry and Meghan Markle King and Queen of the USA. During the announcement...

British expats outraged as boat full of migrants wash up on their Spanish beach

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Beachgoers were surprised by the sight of dozens of migrants scrambling out of the surf today at the Playa de los Alemanes resort in...
Corbyn Glastonbury

Jeremy Corbyn announces plans to nationalise the Glastonbury Music Festival

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Standing on the Pyramid stage at Glastonbury, Jeremy Corbyn had a Eureka moment. "If all these bloody people can afford to come here at these...
Conservative Party

ISIS claim responsibility for Conservative Party Conference

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The attackers wrote Boris’s jokes, Theresa May’s speech and arranged for all the letters to fall off the wall behind the Prime Minister during her main conference address in an audacious display of comic timing.

Men warned not to date clever & pretty girls who might get “a bit...

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A Judge has warned men that they only have themselves to blame if they date very clever, very pretty girls who are "a bit...

Couple still at bottle bank

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A Rochdale couple is now entering their third day of disposing of bottles at their local bottle bank.
Ed Sheeran

Night out at Ed Sheeran gig ruined by Ed Sheeran music

A couple has had their night out at an Ed Sheeran gig completely ruined by Ed Sheeran music. Married couple Steve and Barbara Dickinson from...
Sturgeon

Will of the Scottish People Revealed to be Sturgeon’s Imaginary Friend

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An SNP insider has revealed that Nicola Sturgeon's repeated use of the phrase 'Will of the Scottish People' is actually a reference to her...
Traffic

Workman spotted doing some work on the £15BN M62 Roadworks

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The bloke who is doing all the work on the £15BN M62 road improvement scheme has been spotted on site for the first time...
Mass Shooting

The NRA are a bunch of fucking arseholes and every single member has the...

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But ma guns. A survey in 2013 found that the United States had 88.9 firearms for every 100 people. More than Yemen, Mexico, Pakistan and...

People who ‘say it like it is’ invariably arseholes groundbreaking research concludes

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Researchers at Rochdale Community University have concluded that people who "tell it like it is" are invariably complete arseholes. "People who 'tell it like it...
Asda

Black Friday riots as Asda sell trolleys for £1

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Riot police had to be called to a Rochdale Asda today following a bout of civil disorder. Heavy discounts meant customers could purchase trolleys...
oldham

Fears grow for BBC Explorer missing in Oldham

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The alarm was raised today after BBC documentary maker and explorer Professor Robert Falcon failed to emerge from Oldham after missing his rendezvous with...
Christmas Celebrations

The Big Fat Secret Santa – 10,000 presents worth £70,000 for kids in poverty!

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Incredibly our appeal to buy gifts for children in poverty this year has secured more than 10,000 presents worth more than £70,000 in the...
Amber Rudd

Amber Rudd launches Hate Thy Neighbour initiative

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Amber Rudd announced plans today to crack down on the current outbreak of human compassion sweeping the country. Compassion has been on the rise recently...

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