Scientists admit Rees-Mogg is experiment to create the perfect twat
There was mild surprise today, as the lid was blown off a secret program revealing that Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg was the product of...
Boris Johnson launches ‘Free Robert Mugabe’ campaign
The campaign is headed up by Boris Johnson who is thought to believe that if it's successful he could be the leader of Zanu...
Melania did not have sex with horrible old men for money admits Daily Mail
The Daily Mail have gone on the record today to say that Melania Trump did not and never has had sex with any horrible...
A country full of religious crackpots shouldn’t have nuclear weapons, says country full of...
A country full of religious crackpots and nuclear weapons has condemned another country full of religious crackpots for pressing on with their nuclear programme.
Hassan...
Britain First’s Paul Golding and the EDL’s Ian Crossland announce engagement
Shock today as Britain First leader Paul Golding announced he is to marry EDL chief, Ian Crossland.
Although the pair often claim to support gay...
Right wing extremist appears on Good Morning Britain to interview Tommy Robinson
Good Morning Britain producers made the controversial choice today of asking a divisive, opinionated, loud mouth to appear on their show. Piers Morgan was...
Husband remembers to put recycling bin out on right day
In a stunning feat of memory and dazzling competence a husband from Rochdale has managed to put the right bin out on the right...
Queen announces Prince Harry will become King of the USA following wedding to Meghan...
The Queen has announced that she exercise her right to crown Prince Harry and Meghan Markle King and Queen of the USA.
During the announcement...
VICTORY! I am a racist, not a druggie says Hopkins
Katie Hopkins is celebrating her racist and drug-free status tonight, it has been confirmed.
Hopkins, 67, made a complaint to the Independent Press Standards Organisation...
Clock in car mysteriously right again
There was befuddlement all over the UK this morning after every motorist in the country reported that the clock in the car is mysteriously...
Boris Johnson breaks the ice in DUP meeting with “Paddy and Mick walk into...
It appears only a matter of hours after a desperate Theresa May formed a coalition with the Northern Irish DUP, relationships have broken down.
A...
Jeremy Corbyn rules out coalition with Labour MPs
Jeremy Corbyn took the bold move today to rule out a coalition with SNP, The Greens, The Liberal Democrats and any of the politicians in The Labour Party.
Talking to...
Couple still at bottle bank
A Rochdale couple is now entering their third day of disposing of bottles at their local bottle bank.
Three billion seems reasonable for boat with hole in it, says Government responsible for...
The people responsible for negotiating the UK's exit from the European Union have confirmed that three billion pounds is a completely reasonable sum of...
Elderly Leave voter mistakes Hovis advert for childhood memories
An elderly leave voter has been telling the Herald about his childhood and it's very similar to the Hovis advert.
Roy Bader, 72, who's never...
Your Mum has a dildo
Children all over the country are coming to terms with the horrifying reality that their Mums have at least one dildo.

















































