Sheffield Council declare majority of citizens think world is flat
Sheffield Council has been forced to declare their belief in a flat earth after applying the same statistical analysis to a recent on-line poll...
Deer left shaken by run in with Prince
A Balmoral based deer has spoken out after being run down by the heir to the British throne.
Dougal Hornhead spoke to the Herald after...
Dickheads eaten by lions
At least three dickheads have been mauled to death and eaten by some lovely lions after breaking into a wildlife reserve in South Africa.
The...
Alien Overlords to Admit Existence is a computer simulation.
It is to be announced that reality as we understand it is nothing more than a computer simulation.
The shock admission was beamed into the...
Christians, Muslims, Satanists Opposed To Pokemon Go
Following the UK release of Pokemon Go ten days ago, several prominent spokespersons for leading UK religious organisations have spoken out, condemning the game...
Who you calling dangerous? Asks Kumbuka
Today the Rochdale Herald is delighted to bring you our exclusive interview with Kumbuka the gorilla who briefly escaped from London Zoo this week.
RH:...
Outrage as BBC confirms NONE of tonight’s Blue Planet II animals will be wearing...
The BBC has issued an apology after leaked footage of tonight's 'Blue Planet II' revealed that NONE of the animals featured will be wearing a...
Attenborough Discovers New Great Ape Species In America
Noted elderly naturist David Attenborough was cock-a-hoop yesterday when he announced the discovery of the first new species of great ape for many years.
Mr...
New York Giraffe constipated not pregnant
On the 11th of February, the Animal Adventure Park in Harpursville, New York began a live feed from the inside of a Giraffe pen.
'April' the...
South Yorkshire Police arrest tree during tree felling protest
The long standing dispute over the unpopular and legally dubious felling of Sheffield street trees took a bizarre new turn when South Yorkshire Police...
Turkey escapes Christmas by identifying as a golden eagle.
A turkey on a Norfolk farm has been spared slaughter after claiming to identify as a majestic bird of prey.
"Once I found a tin...
Idiot Dies in Karmic Avalanche
An idiot died in an avalanche of Karma in the town of Colle delle Oche near Turin, Italy yesterday.
Veterinarian Luciano Ponzetto, who split his...
Priti Patel congratulates Boris Johnson on arrival of 3001005789th baby boy
Priti Patel, Minister for whatever the heck it is she does has been one of the first Government Ministers to congratulate Boris Johnson and...
Britons thrilled by early encounter with year’s first Wasp
Millions of Britons were given an early taste of the joys of springtime over the weekend, after the unseasonable February warmth prompted the first...
Pedigree Siberian hamster spotted near Brighton
Christmas came early for a rare pedigree Siberian hamster called Dorothy who's been found safe and well in Upper Dicker, East Sussex, this week....
Gove clarifies that Government will extend the term non-sentient to include any living being...
In a desperate bid to look like the Tories are not using Brexit as an excuse to bring back fox hunting, cock fighting, prima...
