Dead whale found in Thames was Russian spy

0
The Government have announced that a whale that has been found dead beside the River Thames was a Russian spy. The whale was found beside...

Turkey escapes Christmas by identifying as a golden eagle.

0
A turkey on a Norfolk farm has been spared slaughter after claiming to identify as a majestic bird of prey. "Once I found a tin...
Fox

Foxes vote to bring back fox hunting after promise of ‘iconic’ fox passports

0
Foxes across the UK have voted in favour of repealing the 2004 fox hunting ban, following a Government promise to issue them with 'iconic'...
Blue Planet

Outrage as BBC confirms NONE of tonight’s Blue Planet II animals will be wearing...

0
The BBC has issued an apology after leaked footage of tonight's 'Blue Planet II' revealed that NONE of the animals featured will be wearing a...

New York Giraffe constipated not pregnant

0
On the 11th of February, the Animal Adventure Park in Harpursville, New York began a live feed from the inside of a Giraffe pen. 'April' the...

Corbyn pledges 60,000 Mosques to built every year

0
The beleaguered 'leader' of the 'opposition' made the bizzare statement  in an interview with Andrew Neil earlier today. When asked what his motivation for such...

Idiot Dies in Karmic Avalanche

0
An idiot died in an avalanche of Karma in the town of Colle delle Oche near Turin, Italy yesterday. Veterinarian Luciano Ponzetto, who split his...

House spiders launch campaign to reduce number of ‘sleeping mouth’ fatalities

21
A group of house spiders has launched a campaign aimed at reducing the number of arachnids being swallowed by sleeping humans. 
Brown bear in woods

Bear Cancels Plan To Shit In Woods

0
Bryan Pickle, an unemployed brown bear, interrupted a meeting at The National History Museum this morning to make a surprise announcement. "I've been thinking about...

Cats growing increasingly desperate to find cure for Coronavirus

0
Pet cats have announced that they're ramping up their efforts to find a cure for Coronavirus as many find they're now forced to spend...
David Cameron Shed

‘It was a mistake not a disaster’ – Cameron opens up about PigGate

0
Former prime minister David Cameron says placing his genitals in the mouth of a severed pigs head has 'turned out less badly than I...

Christians, Muslims, Satanists Opposed To Pokemon Go

0
Following the UK release of Pokemon Go ten days ago, several prominent spokespersons for leading UK religious organisations have spoken out, condemning the game...

Packham challenges Attenborough in bid to become BBC Natural History Unit alpha male

0
Chris Packham has challenged Sir David Attenborough in a bid to become the BBC Natural History Unit's alpha male. In a display that witnesses have...
Turkberry

Rochdale scientists breed Christmas ‘turkberry’

0
Top food scientists say they are 'very close' to successfully breeding a turkey with a cranberry bush. The new 'turkberry' hybrid bush-bird could be on...

Alien Overlords to Admit Existence is a computer simulation.

0
It is to be announced that reality as we understand it is nothing more than a computer simulation. The shock admission was beamed into the...

Bears cleared of ‘shitting in the woods’ says watchdog

0
The independent Bear Complaints Commission has found that there is no evidence that bears are guilty of shitting in the woods. The misconduct watchdog,...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts