Bryan Pickle, an unemployed brown bear, interrupted a meeting at The National History Museum this morning to make a surprise announcement.
“I’ve been thinking about changing things up for ages.” Mr. Pickle, of no fixed abode began.
“I don’t like being predictable. People call me a free spirit. The way I’ve been dealing with my defecation seemed to fit with my reputation.”
It seems an ancient society was the trigger for his change of plans for the afternoon.
“I got this book, well, it was a gift. A, um, ah, a hunter left it in a cave last summer. After lunch I started reading it.”
It seems learning that the Romans had plumbing and public toilets, even next to brothels, was an eye opening moment for Bryan.
“They worked it out thousands of years ago and here I am, an apex predator, and I’m shitting in the woods today?
“No more.” added Bryan.
“This afternoon, when I need a poo, I’m going right into the centre of town and paying to use the toilets at St. Pancras station. Just try and stop me.”
We won’t Bryan. Good luck.