Jason Manford

Jason Manford Kicks Aid Worker from Wall

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In a move that is sure to delight anti-refugee groups throughout the country, the once amusing Northern 'comedian', Jason Manford shockingly kicked an aid worker from a wall today. The incident happened when Herald journalist,...

Facebook Year in Review video reinforces depressed lonely man’s belief that his friendless existence...

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Retired upholsterer, Brian Mould, was thrilled to see a bespoke video of his 2016 appear on his Facebook newsfeed earlier this week. Filled with anticipation he gleefully  clicked on the link, not knowing that it...

Dalai Lama fury over Louis Smith Buddha is a fat bastard comments

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The Dalai Lama is said to be incandescently furious with Louis Smith after he was overheard calling Buddha a "fat fucker". Two time Olympic Pommel Horse runner up, Strictly Come Dancing winner and sore loser...

Feminist nominated for comedy award they didn’t enter after Facebook tirade

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Ipswich feminist Leigh Askew has been included on the shortlist for a new category at the British Comedy Awards. The inaugural Funniest Social Media Post award has been included to reward those lesser known comedians...
Latest Trump Campaign Poster

Trump Campaign Seeks Divine Intervention

The Trump campaign appears to have taken an unprecedented new course today, with the release of a series of posters on social media. The posters appear to be a cheaply reworked copy of a previous...

Britain First’s meme maker in coma

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As Poppy Day draws ever closer, the strain of making anti Muslim memes has proven to much for Britain First's head of social media, Tommy (No knuckles) Smith, and yesterday he fell off his right-wing...

Biffer mentions bacon and thinks it’s hysterical

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Steven Faratrump from Rotherham today went on Britain First's Facebook page and headed straight to one of the thousands of anti-Muslim posts and quick as a flash posted a comment and slipped in the...

Strangers raise over £170,000 to give to anyone

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A GoFundMe page was set up yesterday and has already raised over a £170,000 with all proceeds to someone. The page's founder, Simon Collins, said; "I don't care who gets the cash, I honestly don't....

Racist lobotomised prick likes Katie Hopkins

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The brown skin hating half brained bigot, Katie Hopkins, has an unfathomably large following since she started peddling bile for The Sun toilet paper. Keith Carlito, an unemployed 24 stone Britain First member said; "A...

Government to encourage more online petitions. 

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Prime Minister Theresa May has today launched a new initiative which will encourage people concerned with issues affecting them, their communities and the country to start a pointless online petition to bring it to...

Special place in hell for people who put kisses on Facebook comments 

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An ancient Biblical commandment that has been left out of Bibles and Torah for thousands of years has finally been translated.  Archeolinguist Barry Wordsworth told us: "Thescroll has been resisting translation throughout history because it...

Man made ‘hilarious’ comment but got no likes

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Brian Dunphy of Newbold saw an article on LadBible about Donald Trump and had the perfect response. "I wrote something hilarious, it was so funny but there were like 3,756 comments about Harambe and it...

Spell Check a Racist crashes Facebook

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Facebook was in chaos today after the soaring popularity of the Spell Check a Racist (S.C.A.R.) page caused a stack overflow causing the entire network to grind to a halt. "Sadly, we had no choice...

Taking are speling back!

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The new Apple iOS update is to include a new autocorrect function for words such as muslin, briton and rasict. Computer giants and tax dodging bastards Apple have confirmed that the next update for its...

NHS partner with WhatsApp to reboot IT project

In a move to reduce costs and breathe new life into the long-abandoned £11.4 billion Centralised Records System, the NHS has announced a partnership with WhatsApp to improve access to patient data. WhatsApp, owned by...

Piers Morgan behaves like a d**k on Twitter, again

Piers Morgan has taken to Twitter to characteristically behave like an utter tit today. Morgan, whose only physical accomplishment of note was to fall off a Segway and break two ribs shortly after saying "you'd...

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