What time is it Mr Woolfe?
Steven Woolfe, a total barrister who serves as a legal adviser to hedge fund managers and bankers narrowly missed his chance to become replacement...
Unelected man demands unelected woman suspends elected parliament
As was inevitable, faced with the likelihood of action being taken through the mechanisms of the British sovereign parliament to avert a no-deal Brexit,...
Brexit means Brexit means Brexit means Brexit confirms EU Brexit negotiator
"It's taken us a week to work out just how clever you Brits are," said negotiator Hans Upp. "We thought it was just a...
Brexit date to be celebrated by New ‘May Day’ Bank Holiday.
It has been announced that as of 2019, the 29th of March will become known as 'May Day' in recognition of the glorious achievements...
David Brent to sing Equality Street at Trump Inauguration
Following the shock withdrawal of Bruce Springsteen tribute band the B-Street Band from the Trump Inauguration David Brent is thrilled to announce that his band Foregone Conclusion have agreed terms to perform.
Boris gets a turd in a box in Cabinet Secret Santa
We heard today that during the final cabinet meeting of 2016, Secret Santa gifts were distributed between Ministers.
Chancellor of the Exchequer, the right honourable...
Government takes time off from covering up child abuse to tell people what kind...
The UK Government has taken time off from failing the victims of institutional child abuse and covering the tracks of high profile paedophiles to tell people what kind of pornography they're allowed to watch.
Prime Minister not taking donations from millionaires for granted
The Tory spin doctors are especially busy this morning on the nation's airwaves ensuring everybody they are not taking yesterday's electoral results as a...
May is a dead duck pushing a white elephant, says Lord Harris
Carpet magnate Lord Harris has given May a high-quality luxury carpeting. "May is a dead duck pushing a white elephant" is not quite what...
Rochdale – Labour NEC “Can’t find its arse with both hands”
In the face of the least popular Tory Government since the Peterloo Massacre, Labour has decided not to bother being an opposition of any...
America To Be Renamed Trumptopia
Donald Trump has announced a new step in his plan to make America great again - he's renaming it after himself.
In a press conference,...
Downing Street denies allegations of incontinence
In an unprecedented announcement, Downing Street issued a denial of any suggestions that the Prime Minister is incontinent.
"During a period of initial uncertainty, many...
Outrage as Trump BBQ ruins White House lawn
White House officials were said to be furious today after Trump supporters burned a cross on the South Lawn last night.
The BBQ, which was...
Confederates, KKK and slave owners outraged by Appointment of Jeff Sessions to Attorney General
Confederates, slave owners and prominent members of the Ku Klux Klan have taken to Facebook to condemn Trump's nomination of Jeff Sessions to the office of Attorney General.
Woman always repeating “no meal is better than a bad meal” went hungry last...
A woman who keeps saying “no meal is better than a bad meal” to the people she’s supposed to have dinner with went hungry...
Essex dog fears for future after hands-on meeting with Prime Minister
Essex - A black and white border collie from Sonning, Essex was reported to be safe in protective custody after being accosted by the...
