No manifesto better than a bad manifesto say Conservatives
Confusion reigns following the Queen's Speech as the Tories deny all knowledge of a manifesto that may, or may not, have existed prior to the recent General Election.
Commentators hoping to compare the content of...
Fatboy runs away from the Ball
The worlds biggest celebrity couple, Ball and Slim, have sadly announced they are to divorce after 18 years of party-hard marriage.
Socialism just a phase says privately educated Cambridge graduate Blairite quitting Labour for V&A
Tristram Hunt had "returned to the fold" and told his friends and family that "his life a socialist was just a phase".
Antarctical 50 signed, Bergxit means Bergxit
Today an area four times the size of London has broken away from the Antarctic landmass. It is a worrying example of rising sea temperatures causing the parts of the Antarctic land mass to...
Neil Armstrong’s body to be exhumed and tested for moon dust
President Donald Trump is understood to have ordered an investigation into whether or not the first moon landing ever happened on this day in 1969?
Trump is rumoured to have long considered the moon landings...
Patients should only suffer because of politics – Insists Hunt
Homeopathic politician and all-round quack-licker Jeremy The Hunt has stated that patients will suffer if planned strikes by junior doctors go ahead.
"Obviously we don't have a problem with patients suffering from underfunding and our...
There’s nothing funny about the Tories moan satirists
Satirists up and down the country are throwing their pens and finger bashing the backspace key in frustration.
"It's the bloody Tories" said one writer for the Herald. "It's really hard to make funny jokes...
Theresa May to be replaced by heavy slow moving rain shower
“Rain shower means rain shower."
British Company Based In Britain Backs Britain
Brexiters across the land are jubilantly crying "We told you so!" after GlaxoSmithKline, a UK company, based in the UK, that wanted the UK to stay in the EU admitted that despite never saying...
If the Irish don’t want Apple’s £11BN tell them we’ll have it – say...
It transpires that North Sea Oil Revenues now contribute £60Million to the Scottish revenue pot, down from almost £13Billion a couple of years ago because you now sell a barrel of North Sea Oil...
Man who received double hand transplant can’t wait to “trim his hedge”
The first person in the UK ever to have a double hand transplant has told The Rochdale Herald that he can't wait to get home to "trim his hedge".
We bet he can't. Chris King...
May supported by Cabinet, which was put together by same carpenter who hung Conference...
The PM today insisted that she is fully supported by her cabinet; a flat-pack Nordik 465 Ikea bedside cabinet in white Formica, that she bought on eBay from a student that never put it...
‘GO HARD OR GO HOME’ Corbyn screams at Shadow Cabinet
Three Labour frontbenchers have been sacked and a fourth has resigned after voting for a Queen's speech amendment calling for Britain to remain within the European Single Market. Fifty Labour MPs defied the whip...
Florence and the McMachine
McDonald's is suing Florence over claims that the historic city is "promoting a healthy diet & lifestyle contrary to Western values
Costa kicks Conte into touch
Former Chelsea Striker Diego Costa says he did not want to leave the club on bad terms, after being dragged kicking and screaming from a burning effigy of Antonio Conte at the Chelsea training...
Corbyn stands on box labelled Schrödinger’s jobs brexit at Labour conference
The Labour conference in Brighton today will feature an entertaining diversion when national treasure Jeremy Corbyn takes to the stage and stands on a wooden box labelled Schrödinger’s Jobs Brexit, but refuses to look...
