High Court Judge gives blow job to Brexit
Theresa May's assertion that "Brexit means Brexit" has been met with a blow with a reply of "Democracy means Democracy" by the high court...
SNP Manifesto just bootleg copy of Braveheart and sheet of paper saying Referendums
The long awaited SNP manifesto is released today to huge anticipation.
Little Chef Change All Breakfasts To ‘Pork-Free’ After Complaints by ‘Foreigners’.
British roadside dining legends Little Chef have decided to make all their breakfasts, including their famous ‘All Day Breakfast’, entirely pork-free following a campaign...
Man who doesn’t support party leader confused by people not supporting party leader
Bespectacled centrist Labour Party leadership candidate Owen Smith has questioned whether or not the audience at a Glasgow hustings were "entryists."
This was because the...
Peter Pan of Pop Peeves Proud Populace
Cliff Richards recently learned that South Yorkshire Police will not be pursuing historic sexual abuse claims against him, but he hasn't escaped the wrath...
Soon to be estranged husband proposes ‘transitional sexual union’
Under the suggested terms of the deal, Britton, 34, would remain in the family home for up to a further two years, and would be entitled to avail himself of all the sexual benefits associated with a normal marriage.
Corbyn “gives” Labour MP’s free vote on Trident
Besieged Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn has generously given the MP's in the Labour Party the opportunity to vote with their conscience rather than...
No Plans For Apple Tax to Just Rest in Irish Account
The Irish government and their opposition are in agreement that they shouldn't have to tax corporations after an EU court suggested that perhaps Ireland...
BBC Resolves Gender Pay Gap Crisis
Human Resources managers at the BBC have worked tirelessly throughout the weekend (completing two days of back-to-back 6 hour shifts with reduced
ginseng tea...
Government immigration policy document wedged between windows described as strong and stable
The media was all over reports this morning that a strong and stable government policy document on immigration has become wedged between two windows...
Trust me to deliver Brexit, says woman you wouldn’t trust to deliver a pizza
"I'll deliver Brexit just like I deliver pizza." That's what Theresa May said and people have been queuing up to say that that's Brexit...
Bake Off viewers shocked as Paul Hollywood offers Manon Lagreve an iced finger
Great British Bake Off viewers have been taking to social media tonight in anger after Paul Hollywood offered contestant Manon Lagreve an iced finger.
Bernadette...
Katie Hopkins outraged as new IPhone X automatically set to permanently disabled and unable...
Odious journo-babbler, Katie Hopkins was furious yesterday when she discovered that her new IPhone X was in fact less use than Boris Johnson in...
Poundland to rebrand as Two Poundland by March 2017
Exciting news on the High Street as budget retailer Poundland announces a multi-million pound rebranding initiative.
Jeremy Corbyn washes the muddy feet of Glastonbury goers
This year's Glastonbury festival has turned into something of a spiritual and political awakening of the masses, as Jeremy Corbyn attended the annual arts...
People’s Republic of Kensington wins oxymoron of the year award
The people of Kensington & Chelsea, one of the richest boroughs in London, having elected their first Labour MP, have taken things one step...
