Rees Mogg

Freestyle rapper, Rees-Moggy Mogg to win back Conservative youth vote

32
In a bid to appear more accessible to young people the Conservative party have updated the image of some of their more prominent MPs. The...

Tim Farron quits politics to record Judy Garland cover album

6
Tim Farron has sensationally quit the leadership of the Liberal Democrats this week to pursue a lifelong ambition to become a full time Judy Garland impersonator.
Elton John

Being a Liberal Democrat is not a sin claims Elton John

0
The ageing singer and renowned diva famous for her tantrums, Mariah Carey, asked Elton John about his views on the struggling political party at...

Veteran grime artist G to the Ozzo blasts government with fresh diss track

0
In a blistering attack worthy of such Hip Hop classics Tupac Shakur's Hit Em up and Nas Escobar's Ether.
Ramones

Onlookers stunned as man in Ramones t-shirt successfully names two band members

123
The patrons and entire staff team at The Reed public house were in shock yesterday, after a man wearing a culturally iconic but no...

Google crashes as hipsters race to be “lifelong influenced” by Fats Domino

0
The death of the latest life-long influence of people too painfully cool for words, Fats Domino, has caused a Google Crash despite everyone thinking...
James blunt

James Blunt demands Knighthood after Ed Sheeran receives MBE

5
The news of Ed Sheeran’s accolade in the latest honours list has been greeted by mixed reactions. His fans have welcomed the news, but their...
Ed Sheeran

Ed Sheeran receives MBE for services to blandness

28
Ed Sheeran was clearly chuffed to receive his MBE for services to blandness, remarking, "I really don't know what to say, but it's a great...
Middle Aged Man

Man ‘still hip’ because he likes new bands like Radiohead

24
Derek Brasshouse, 54, an accountant in Rochdale Borough Council's swimming pool department, considers himself to be still 'with it' because he enjoys new bands...
child

Complete sadist buys 2 year old nephew a keyboard for Christmas

0
A man from Rochdale has bought his nephew the gift of music for Christmas. Stan Still told us, "I've played in bands since I was...
The Pope

If Barry Manilow is gay then I’m a Catholic says Pope

0
Housewives favourite and renowned woman shagger Barry Manilow stunned the world yesterday by finally revealing he's gay.

Spice Girls Wannapee reunion tour sponsored by Tena

0
Music - The world's most successful all-girl prefabricated band The Spice Girls have announced plans to reform. The quintet, featuring the newly-nicknamed Crusty Spice, Stairlift...

Jeremy Corbyn to produce next Stormzy album.

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It has been confirmed that Jeremy Corbyn will be producing the next Stormzy album. The album will be produced in a reclaimed timber shed on...

Musicians speak at upset of knowing that Tories like their work

4
Distraught musicians Florence Welch and Calvin Harris have spoken out at their horror of discovering that they have next to no control over what...
Kim Jong Un Submarine

Fatboy Kim to re-release his mix of Radioactivity

0
In a move to hail his comeback, the king of hereditary Marxist dictators, Kim Young Un aka Fatboy Kim, has announced a rehashing of...

Corbyn popularity ratings soar after ZZ Top grant him keys to magic Hot Rod

0
In what would at first glance appear to be a complete and utter ripoff of an Onion article dating back to 1997, Labour Party...

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