National News

  Fifa officials last night refused to comment on rumours that they all turned down Vladimir Putin's offer of an all-expenses paid trip to Zizzi's in Moscow.  However, The Rochdale Herald's brown envelope full of money...

Donald Trump was interviewed by self-aggrandising egotist Piers Morgan over the weekend. Morgan, who likes to pretend to stand for traditional British values such as respecting the armed services despite famously being sacked by The...

Scotland's first minister has said autumn 2018 would be a "common sense" date for a 4th independence referendum. Nicola Sturgeon continued to insist, however, that English arrogance, the poor performance of Celtic in the Champions...

Home Secretary Amber Rudd has admitted that she did actually get the memo about specific migrant removal targets, but was unable to read it because she's completely illiterate. The Guardian reported a leaked memo dated...

You just get such a sense of the hardship, and how it could be addressed by just taking a little more personal responsibility After taking part in a sponsored sleep out, investment banker Yiwen Kerr...

A man who thinks that separating children from their parents and putting them in a cage is a good idea has said that the UK should be more positive about Brexit. POTATUS ambassador to the...

Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn has confirmed his long held suspicions that his pet cat is a died in the wool, cast iron Tory. Corbyn first suspected that his not so faithful feline friend was...

Boris Johnson, United Kingdom Foreign Secretary and all round honest broker, took the airwaves via the Today programme this morning to promise the UK will send £350M a week in relief aid to the...

"There's way more to choosing where to poo than you realise" Bobby, a 5 year old Chocolate Lab from York has told The Rochdale Herald. Breaking his silence, Bobby said that it has been a...

The woman who managed to get thirty hours free childcare using the HMRC has been thrown out of MENSA for being “too clever” and has been invited to appear on the BBC’s Mastermind quiz...

The Daily Telegraph has today released photos of the M.P's it says should wear arm bands that signify their mutineer status. The paper says that the armbands should be in the design of the EU...

80's TV ad star and renowned juice producer, Derek Monte, was rushed to hospital yesterday and  immediately diagnosed with scurvy, a debilitating illness caused by a severe vitamin C deficiency that commonly affected pirates...

Andy Edge, a former Stockport English Defence League leader convicted of violent disorder at a 2014 protest, was pictured giving the thumbs up with UKIP's NHS hating, vile hate preacher, Paul Nuttall. In a statement, an...

Yesterday's fire at the Burnley School for the Arts has caused £500 worth of damage. Early indications are that the bus stop is irreparably damaged. Burnley Art School was founded in 1968 as part of...

The Rochdale Institute of Advanced Fathering has issued a statement today offering to do away with Father's Day on the condition Mother's Day goes also. The offer is a timely one as fathers across the...

Stoke's election Returning Officer was forced to admit to an embarrassing mistake when he opened the wrong envelope and declared Labour had won. "I was handed an envelope by someone very junior and it had...