Donald Trump was interviewed by self-aggrandising egotist Piers Morgan over the weekend.
Morgan, who likes to pretend to stand for traditional British values such as respecting the armed services despite famously being sacked by The Daily Mirror after publishing fake photographs of British soldiers mistreating Iraqi prisoners asked Mr Trump who his favourite member of 1 Direction was. Mr Trump was torn between Harry Styles and “That one with the hair”.
Morgan has faced criticism in the past over his soft approach to interviewing Donald Trump. In response to that Mr Trump was asked questions such as, “Who puts the bins out? You or Melania?”
“What tips would you give somebody who wants to be just like you?”
“How do you get your hair to do that?”
“What’s your favourite bag of crisps?”
“If you could be any form of punctuation what would it be?
The interview was met with rave reviews. One publications said, “Morgan plumbed new depths of Donald Trump. Namely, he plumbed Trumps entire rectum. It may be several weeks before we see him again.”
Trump for his part said that he thought that Piers Morgan should be made Prime Minister as he had better hair than Boris Johnson.
There was no mention of Trump’s BFF Nigel Farage however, Mr Farage was spotted with his face pushed up against the fence of Trump’s security fence yelling in Russian.
Mr Trump will leave Scotland today so that he can be in Helsinki to meet US President Vladimir Putin. Both sides have denied that the visit will feature topless horse riding as it’s said to include Trump giving Putin everything he want’s.
