Burnley twins with itself
After an extensive search, the Burnley Council has decided that the town best suited to twinning with Burnley is Burnley itself.
"We hired a consultant...
‘If it wasn’t for your size I’d eat you’ cat admits to owner
An honest cat has admitted to its owner that the only reason it hasn’t eaten her is down to her relative size.
The cat explained...
Local Nun in record attempt to raise the roof
A local Nun from Sacred Heart Church in Rochdale could soon become famous for a world record attempt if, with the help of The...
PARENT’S FURY AT COMPULSORY ARABIC LESSONS AT ROCHDALE PRIMARY SCHOOL
Parents are furious about Rochdale Primary School's decision to force children to learn Arabic symbols in Maths lessons.
Many parents believe that forcing their children...
Rochdale Herald Editor Re-admitted to Hospital
Herald editor, Quentin D. Fortesqueue has been re-admitted to Rochdale General Hospital for surgery to remove his tongue from his cheek.
The jaded and cynical...
3rd Day of Sunshine sees Hose Pipe Bans Across UK
As the heatwave currently hitting the UK enters its third day water companies across Britain have enforced hose pipe bans once again.
Despite months of...
Yeovil MP threatens local Mum with legal action over Facebook page
Fop haired twat and Yeovil MP Marcus "doesn't respond to emails" Fysh has become embroiled in a freedom of speech row on Twitter and...
Army called in to Burnley find ‘riot’ just sale at Farmfoods
The British Army was deployed in Burnley town centre earlier today to quell civil unrest apparently taking place in the city's popular shopping district.
Army...
16 Dead In Rochdale Women’s Institute Needle Exchange Hep B Outbreak
The Department of Health have launched an inquiry into an outbreak of Hepatitis B at a Rochdale WI knitting needle swap scheme after untreated...
Hull favourite for Turner prize for ironic depiction of City of Culture
Kingston Upon Hull has been tipped by the bookies to win the Turner Prize for Irony this year.
The famed port city and its people...
Socks and a tie on Rochdale man’s Christmas list
Rochdale resident Steve Dickinson is hoping for unusual Christmas presents from his wife Barbara this year.
"I'm running really low on socks, so some of...
Really clean woman furious with ‘Not OCD’ diagnosis
A local woman is said to be furious to discover that she isn't actually OCD.
"I clean the floor and hoover the curtains three times...
Rochdale Residents excited at house price rises in Post-Apocalypse Britain
Rochdale residents are said to be very excited by the prospect of house price rises for the first time in almost a century in...
War of the Roses: The Rematch
Rochdalians reacted with righteous fury over news of what is seen at best as an aggressive land grab and, at worst, a declaration of...
Poll reveals public wants good old fashioned political sex scandal
A Herald survey reveals that public perception of politicians lean towards disappointment at them not having any juicy sex scandals anymore.
Carried out at the...
Topless Danczuk in topless holiday prison catfight scandal
The owner of a Villa in Alicante is said to be furious after discovering the Danczuk's had been holidaying in his property.
Simon Danczuk, God...
