Rochdale’s Indian Youth Bemoan Lack of “English” Takeaways
Rochdale's Indian youth have complained that there is a distinct lack of late night 'English' takeaway food available in the town.
"You know what it's...
Only two Prime Ministers until Christmas
It may only be July but there are only two Prime Ministers until Christmas. That's according to the British Christmas Monitoring League.
The warning comes...
Really clean woman furious with ‘Not OCD’ diagnosis
A local woman is said to be furious to discover that she isn't actually OCD.
"I clean the floor and hoover the curtains three times...
Lancashire residents to be given counselling as water supply found to be contaminated with...
Water company United Utilities has been fined £300,000 after supplying water unfit for human consumption.
Nearly a million households in Lancashire were warned they should...
Theresa May to communicate Brexit deal using dance
Theresa May will communicate the UK's Brexit plan to the House of Commons later today using the medium of dance.
One insider told us, "The...
War of the Roses: The Rematch
Rochdalians reacted with righteous fury over news of what is seen at best as an aggressive land grab and, at worst, a declaration of...
UK’s 2nd most popular boys name is currently Boaty McBoatface
Latest figures released on the governments website www.gov.co.uk reveal the good old British sense of humour is alive and well as almost unbelievably Boaty...
Rochdale Nightmare Scenario As Shops Run Dry Of Pie Supply
Rochdale citizens were today warned against panic buying one of the staples of their diet.
A widespread shortage of Futtock's Pies has been reported...
Harvey Weinstein is a Democrat is the new Hitler was a Vegetarian
Hip new fashy fashion hits Brownhill School
All the coolest kids in Brownhill School, Rochdale, have adopted it. “Yeah well, Harvey Weinstein was a Democrat so...
Apology after nativity bites in Rochdale
A church in Rochdale has issued an apology and removed two donkeys from it's nativity scene following an incident yesterday involving one of the...
It is too soon to spoon say Northern Rail commuters
Northern Rail commuters have confirmed that the length of time it takes to get to work is definitely too soon to spoon.
28 year old...
Police find cannabis farm at Rochdale old folks home
Cannabis plants have been uncovered at 'Bright Horizons' home for the elderly, Kirkholt, this morning.
Police describe the haul as a kick in the...
Wife suspects husband of having an affair with his shed
A wife has begun to suspect her husband of having an affair with his shed.
“He was the most doting husband when we first married,”...
Miracle Declared As TK Maxx Customer Finds Acceptable Pair Of Jeans
A TK Maxx customer in Rochdale has described his purchase of a pair of jeans that look acceptable and fit perfectly as “nothing short...
Shock as traces of vegetables found in supermarket ready meals
Food enthusiasts have demanded an enquiry after research showed that as many as 1 in 10 supermarket ready meals contain trace amounts of vegetables.
A...
Paul Nuttall in surprise bid to become MP for Covfefe
In a move which has delighted the electorate of Boston and Skegness, Nuttall has transferred his allegiance. Nutcase claims divine intervention: "According to the Gospel of...
