Local News

Kingston Upon Hull has been tipped by the bookies to win the Turner Prize for Irony this year. The famed port city and its people have been shortlisted for ironically depicting a city of culture...

Fop haired twat and Yeovil MP Marcus "doesn't respond to emails" Fysh has become embroiled in a freedom of speech row on Twitter and Facebook. Mr Fysh MP, who owns a computer and apparently a...

A local woman is said to be furious to discover that she isn't actually OCD. "I clean the floor and hoover the curtains three times a day!" Barbara Dickinson, a 47 year old bank teller...

Following the announcement that Labour leadership challenger Owen Smith has promised to hold a second referendum on Brexit if he topples Jeremy Corbyn in the upcoming Labour leadership battle, local Rochdale UKIP supremo Mohammed Masud has...

It has been revealed that Clr Brian 'Hodge' Podge, the Sheffield Councillor responsible for the hugely unpopular street tree felling programme, was rushed to hospital yesterday. Sheffield Council is Labour controlled and Labour Councillor Podge...

Thae Yong Ho, a North Korean diplomat, is widely reported to have defected from the People's Totally Free And Lovely Free People's Free Democratic Free Republic of Free North Korea after experiencing Rochdale town...

Rochdale citizens were today warned against panic buying one of the staples of their diet. A widespread shortage of Futtock's Pies has been reported throughout the Rochdale area and up to several shoppers have...

The Rochdale Herald can reveal controversial Home Office plans to settle new male immigrants in areas of Britain with too many single women in an attempted boost to integration, and ultimately to increase Britain's...

In the face of the least popular Tory Government since the Peterloo Massacre, Labour has decided not to bother being an opposition of any sort by failing to find its collective arse with both...

Rochdale's Indian youth have complained that there is a distinct lack of  late night 'English' takeaway food available in the town. "You know what it's like - you go out with your mates for a...

There was OUTRAGE in Rochdale this afternoon after council documents were leaked to The Rochdale Herald about the forthcoming closure of the world famous Stansfield nudist beach. Naturists have been frolicking stark bollock naked on...

There were jubilant scenes in Rochdale last night as tens of Faringe Estate residents gathered around makeshift bonfires and burning cars to celebrate picking up the prestigious "Shithole of the Year Award" from The...

Barmy Council Imposes Blanket Blakey Ban Rochdale Metropolitan Borough Council have imposed a blanket ban on Segs, the popular metal footwear protector, following complaints from the janitorial team concerning damage caused to the newly laid parquet flooring...

“Forecasting weather in Spain is easy.” Senor Dos explained, bobbing up and down on a piece of driftwood in the English Channel. “It’s always good.”

A newborn baby is deliberately planning the most inconvenient time to either shit himself or start screaming for no reason. Lancashire-born newborn dickhead Barry Dickinson said; "It's all about timing, sleeping with one eye open...

With Remembrance Sunday just under two weeks away, a Rochdale man has made what he regards as the ultimate sacrifice in honour of our troops - by having his head turned into a giant POPPY.  Darren Fudd, 42, paid over £25,000 for the transformation, which took...