FBI

There was nothing to tip us off about that bloke who bought 33 guns...

1
The FBI have reiterated that there were absolutely no clues that a bloke who bought thirty three semi-automatic rifles in one year might have...

Child struggling with his job watches a kid with a lawnmower

6
A child struggling to do his job took time out of his day to watch a kid push a lawn mower at the White House the other day.

I married him for rugged good looks and winning personality claims Melania Trump

18
Melania Trump has gone on the record to tell the world that she married Donald Trump not for his money but his rugged good looks, winning personality and his open minded views on immigration.
Sea Wall

Trump announces plan for sea wall to keep out foreign storms

14
Donald Trump has unveiled his latest scheme to “make America great again” - a huge wall along the entire coast to keep out hurricanes,...
Trump Golf Twitter

FBI reveals to Trump evidence of a golf course at Chernobyl

0
The FBI have allegedly revealed the location of a secret golf course in Chernobyl to Donald Trump today. One FBI spokesman said, "POTATUS was on...
Donald Trump

Trump tells CNN all future press conferences will be held in Saudi Embassy

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POTATUS has announced that he will begin to give CNN press conferences in Saudi Embassies from now on. The announcement comes as his administration complained...

Michael Moore to release new ‘Bowling for Bowling Green’ documentary

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The renowned liberal film maker made the announcement on his Facebook page earlier today, stating; "After the huge success of my 2002 film, Bowling for...

National holiday declared as USA goes 6 days without mass shooting

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This is the closest to a full week that the US has gone without a mass shooting since 'The Great Week of Peace' in...

US police to swear allegiance directly to Trump and be called the Orange Shirts

1
In a bold new democracy-busting move, Emperor Trump has decreed the police will now swear an oath of allegiance directly to the person of...
Mike Pence

Jesus definitely said ‘Suffer the little children to come unto me, so I can...

0
The US Vice President, Mike Pence, has told reporters that the Trump administration's policy of keeping child migrants in cages is definitely consistent with the...
Time Magazine

Trump towers above the little people for TIME magazine

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President-elect of the USA Donald J Trump has been named “Person Of The Year” by TIME magazine which referred to its own nation as...

White House confirms all its press staff do coke

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The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke. The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...
Donald Trump

All options on table including surprise missile attack on Tuesday, Trump tells Syria on...

0
Actual real-life president of the United States of America Donald Trump has tweeted that Russia and Syria should get smart and expect a surprise...

Trump Spokesman Revealed As Black Knight

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The Herald can exclusively reveal today that the Trump campaign aide, Michael Cohen, is the mysterious Black Knight.   The secretive warrior and guard to stuff...

Donald Trump Jr upset by chants of ‘lock him up’ from Donald Trump Snr

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Donald Trump Jr has allegedly complained that President Trump keeps chanting 'lock him up' at him. Trump Junior made a complaint to a White House...

I don’t need no intelligence, I got this far without none says Trump

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Donald Trump confounded satirists again this week after sensationally declaring that he doesn't need intelligence as he has managed to get this far without it.

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