Nuttall Claims Best Actor At Oscars

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Armenian born British Actor Constantine Felangi, better known by his stage name of Paul Nuttall, seized the coveted golden statue for Best Actor at...

Hartman on Trump – POTUS’s US Marine Corp induction transcript revealed

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Following the sad and untimely death of Gunnery Sergeant Hartman of the US Marine Corps, The Rochdale Herald has obtained an exclusive transcript of...

Hurricane Harvey considered least destructive 2020 presidential candidate

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In an attempt to win back votes from the orange-painted tweeting shitangutan, the Democrats have turned to Hurricane Harvey to stand as their candidate...

Obama rushed to hospital after biting through lip during Trump press conference

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President Barack Obama was rushed to hospital yesterday after sustaining injuries during a press conference. Herald reporter Scott McCracknee was there and describes what happened. "Mr...
The Mooch

Scaramucci denies snorting cocaine in front of White House press corp

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Anthony Scaramucci, The Mooch, President Trump’s new distraction in chief, has denied snorting cocaine with a rolled up fifty dollar note jammed into his...
Wayne La Pierre

Only a good guy with a knife can stop a bad guy with a...

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The Head of the National Cutlery Association, Wayne La Cuillère, has lashed out at Donald Trump on Twitter this afternoon, after the US President...
Trump Air Force one

Former military cadet fulfils lifelong ambition to visit Vietnam despite agonisingly debilitating bonespurs

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A former military cadet has finally fulfilled his dream to visit Vietnam despite suffering from debilitating bonespurs. The man, now in his seventies, is said...

Pathetic spoilt lying child learns lying works both ways

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A nursery class somewhere in the US was reportedly in turmoil yesterday.  The usual relative calm was shattered by a screaming blubber-baby having a foot...
Donald Trump

Trump turns down White House sexual harassment course because ‘I’m already pretty good at...

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News broke this morning that Donald Trump has turned down an offer from the White House human resources department to attend a special course...
Obama and Biden

Obama and Biden spend last afternoon playing ‘hide the turd’ at White House

7
Outgoing President and his VP Joe Biden have spent their last afternoon in office playing 'hide the turd' in The White House.

Trump Outraged To Learn of Invention of Phonograph

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Taking to Twitter, So Called President Trump rounded on critics of his administration within the media, and their underhand strategy of recording stuff. "Edison fake American....

US WWII veterans arrested after Trump bans anti-fascists

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In extraordinary scenes the US Secret Service have rounded up and imprisoned several second world war veterans after Donald Trump announced the banning of...

All guns to be armed with guns

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...

Trump and Kim Jong Un to meet on Love Island

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A rearranged summit between Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un will take place on Love Island.  The news comes amid speculation that a high ranking...

Trump says he didn’t sexually assault 3.52 billion other women

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Bewigged bouffant buffoon, Donald J. Trump, an actual potential president, made the claim at his latest rally. The tiny handed eater of souls came under...

Luftwaffe didn’t tell Hitler about every bomb dropped, just sayin, Spicer tells press corps

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Sean Spicer has put rumours to rest that Hawkish generals in the United States military are deploying military assets without Presidential authorisation. "Look I know...

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