Tony Montana

Tony Montana to become new White House communications director

3
Tony Montana is set to become White House communications director following the sacking of Anthony Scaramucci today. Mr Montana was last seen toting M16A1 guns...
Dance Off

Kim Jong Un can’t dance, that brother ain’t got no Seoul

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“Kim Jong Un? He can’t dance, that brother ain’t got no Seoul. You know I put the rump into Trump babycakes. When I slut drop you know it’s going to be fire and fury on the dance floor.”
Roy Moore

Roy Moore ordered to pay if he wants another go after coming in a...

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The Alabama Secretary of State has told Judge Roy Moore that he will have to finance any recount of the Senate seat vote. John Merrill...
Farage in Russian hat

Nigel farage to accept Russian Government lifetime achievement award in person

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Nigel Farage MP (just kidding) is alleged to be thrilled at being awarded the Russian Government's lifetime achievement award. Zoya Feedosev, Russian envoy to...
Redneck

Burning American flag saved after hero puts out fire using black man

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A flag of the United States of America was saved from burning today after a brave patriot quelled the flames using an African American...

Susan Boyle to sing Dead Kennedys ‘Too Drunk To F*ck’ at Trump Inauguration

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In a last ditch attempt to find a "celebrity" to perform at Trump's Inauguration Scottish songstress and Britain's Got Talent sensation Susan Boyle (aka...
Trump Walking

Trump’s cognitive ability is normal, says White House vet

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WASHINGTON: The actual real-life US President Donald Trump has achieved a normal score on a cognitive exam and is in excellent fettle, although he...

Donald Trump commemorative jigsaws to have missing pieces by design

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The White House has confirmed that the new range of Trump jigsaw puzzles, commemorating the President's achievements in office, are deliberately missing several pieces. The...

Trump Invades Iraq

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President Trump has declared war on Iraq after a five minute conversation with Tony Blair. The former British PM, referred to by White House officials...

Trump wears tinfoil hat to stop Obama hearing his thoughts…

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President Donald J. Trump has come up with an ingenious solution to prevent Obama from ‘spying on his thoughts’. He now wears a tinfoil...

Sean Spicer announces Foetuses included in Trump Travel Ban

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Within the last hour the White House has announced plans to extend its controversial travel ban to unborn foetuses.  Trump’s Press Secretary, Sean Spicer, confirmed that the...
Trump Air Force one

Former military cadet fulfils lifelong ambition to visit Vietnam despite agonisingly debilitating bonespurs

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A former military cadet has finally fulfilled his dream to visit Vietnam despite suffering from debilitating bonespurs. The man, now in his seventies, is said...

Thank God it was a lone wolf with mental issues and not a terrorist...

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More than 50 people have been killed and over 200 injured in a gun attack in Las Vegas, Nevada, today. It has become the...
Donald Trump

Trump enlists Gary Glitter to play inauguration

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There are reports that Donald Trump is struggling to find top acts to perform or present at his inaugural event. The demagogue was able to...

Donald Trump to lift Muslim ban ‘with immediate effect’ after learning of Manchester protests

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The new President's controversial Muslim ban has caused outrage across the globe and chaos in airports all across the US. Last night thousands of protesters...

Leaked memo from US Embassy in London written in Crayon

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There has been shock amongst diplomatic circles this morning after a leaked memo written in crayon from the US Ambassador in London revealed that...

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