Sorry Trump

Trump condemns dead soldier for not standing during national anthem

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President Donald Trump has rebuked allegations of inappropriate comments made by the grieving widow of a US soldier today by pointing out her husband...

Nuttall Claims Best Actor At Oscars

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Armenian born British Actor Constantine Felangi, better known by his stage name of Paul Nuttall, seized the coveted golden statue for Best Actor at...

Trump Introduces 2020 Presidential Campaign Mascot

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President Trump took to the stage in Nuremberg, Florida, on Saturday in front of a crowd seen from space, to unveil his mascot for...
Fuck

Seriously?

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I mean, just....Fuck,  Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck.  A spokesman for minorities everywhere said; "Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck...
Trump Walking

Trump’s cognitive ability is normal, says White House vet

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WASHINGTON: The actual real-life US President Donald Trump has achieved a normal score on a cognitive exam and is in excellent fettle, although he...
Duke Brothers

Trump Presidency revealed as elaborate Duke Brothers $1 bet

8
Reclusive Wall Street tycoons the Duke Brothers have been at it again, this time betting against US Democracy.

Donald Trump to lift Muslim ban ‘with immediate effect’ after learning of Manchester protests

1
The new President's controversial Muslim ban has caused outrage across the globe and chaos in airports all across the US. Last night thousands of protesters...
Francis Underwood

Fictional President held to higher standard than actual President

1
Fictional President of the United States Francis Underwood has been obliged to step down this week following allegations of historical sexual harassment. Whilst his Presidency...

White House confirms all its press staff do coke

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The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke. The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...
Scaramucci

I only just learned how to spell Scaramucci and he’s been fucking fired, complains...

18
A highly paid and widely syndicated satirist has complained about the firing of the White House Head of Communications Antony Scarymuchly, as he’s only...

Toymaker confesses he made Melania Trump to keep Pinocchio company

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A Tuscan toymaker has ended days of speculation by confessing he made a new female doll to keep his infamous, lying, long nosed boy...

First shipment of thoughts and prayers for mass shooting victims arrive in California

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It's all better in California now after a much needed vital shipment of thoughts and prayers arrived in Gilroy following today's mass shooting. "Yeah, we're...
Time Magazine

Trump towers above the little people for TIME magazine

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President-elect of the USA Donald J Trump has been named “Person Of The Year” by TIME magazine which referred to its own nation as...
Golden sceptre

Trump orders Fabergé selfie-stick for inauguration

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In preparation for his inauguration ceremony, President elect Trump has commissioned Fabergé, the esteemed and historic jewellery makers to the Russian emperors, to craft...

Denmark offers to buy America from Russia

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Mette Frederiksen, the Prime Minister of Denmark has reportedly expressed an interest in buying the Russian controlled territory of the United States of America. Rich...
Pumpkin

Halloween pumpkin mistaken for President Trump

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The embarrassing incident occurred after Ivanka left the pumpkin in the Oval Office. A meeting of President Trump’s closest advisors failed to realise that...

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