Melania puts down deposit on $80 million one bedroom flat in Paris
The First Lady of the US has reportedly put an undisclosed deposit down on a small one bedroom flat worth $80,000,000 in the centre of Paris earlier today.
Eyebrows were raised as the news was...
Germany to face sanctions for failing to help US during D-Day landings
Donald Trump has today announced a huge package of far reaching sanctions against Germany after discovering that Germany failed to help the US during the D-Day landings.
The sanctions will take effect on Monday and...
‘The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a car, is a...
"You want this sort of thing to happen less often? You don’t need to ban cars, you need to ban piece of sh*t, Nazi-sympathising, race-hating, white supremacist assh*les from marching through city streets with burning torches," said one Antifa protestor.
The United States to allow Guns to be purchased from Vending Machines
United States, Washington DC - A new bill has been passed in the United States, to allow firearms to be sold from Vending Machines.
The bill will take effect over the summer. This will...
Trump abandons plans to build wall, resolves to plant Leylandii hedge on Mexican border
Donald Trump has announced that he's no longer going to demand money to build a wall at the border between the United States and Mexico. Instead, he intends to spend a couple of grand...
Trump’s travel ban now badge of merit as countries begin adding themselves voluntarily
President Donald Trump, perhaps the funniest American president since the last republican one, has hailed the success of his travel ban after many countries volunteered to join it over the weekend.
"TREVAL BAN NOW MERIT...
White House admits Trump thought Korean War was fought in Star Trek
The White House has apparently confirmed that POTATUS, Donald Trump, thought the Korean War was a war fought in the 1970's in Star Trek.
The admission comes several weeks after Mr Trump seemed to suggest...
Trump loses grip on reality, demands to be new Dr Who.
US President Donald Trump has called on the BBC to appoint him as the new Dr Who.
In a series of tweets at 3am this morning the famously insomniac US president announced that he would...
Donald Trump: DNA test finds ‘strong evidence’ of human DNA
US President Donald Trump has revealed that a DNA test shows "strong evidence" that he is distantly related to human beings.
He took the test after the Native American Democat Senator Elizabeth Warren taunted him...
Trump condemns dead soldier for not standing during national anthem
President Donald Trump has rebuked allegations of inappropriate comments made by the grieving widow of a US soldier today by pointing out her husband didn’t stand for the national anthem.
Myeshia Johnson, widow of Sgt...
America To Be Renamed Trumptopia
Donald Trump has announced a new step in his plan to make America great again - he's renaming it after himself.
In a press conference, he told the assembled reporters, "look, America Ves-whatshisname did a...
Trump rushed to John Hopkins with severe burns
Donald Trump is said to be in a stable but critical condition this morning after being rushed to hospital suffering from self inflicted third degree burns to almost half of his body.
Fact checking website...
Canada recognises the Alamo as capital of Mexico
Donald Trump has given a calm and measured response to news that Canada intends to move it's Mexican embassy to the Alamo.
Just kidding. Trump was furious at the announcement by Justin Trudeau's Government that...
I don’t need no intelligence, I got this far without none says Trump
Donald Trump confounded satirists again this week after sensationally declaring that he doesn't need intelligence as he has managed to get this far without it.
IOC Vote Against New American Sport in 2020 Olympics
The USA's hopes to add another pointlessly American sport to the 2020 Olympic have been dashed by the IOC due to concerns over the scoring system.
The USAOC had lobbied to have Police-State Violence -...
I married him for rugged good looks and winning personality claims Melania Trump
Melania Trump has gone on the record to tell the world that she married Donald Trump not for his money but his rugged good looks, winning personality and his open minded views on immigration.
