Firefighters called to Downing St after woman stuck in windows retrieving solid policy document
Reports this morning out of Downing Street say firefighters were called last night after a woman became stuck between two windows attempting to retrieve...
Citizen’s arrest powers updated to include summary execution
Put your hands on the car and get ready to die.
Home Secretary Amber Rudd confirmed today that the Police and Criminal Evidence Act (PACE)...
Clocks won’t go back this month due to EU ruling
The European Union and the UK Government have agreed that the UK's clocks won't go back an hour in October this year or change...
Massive Iceberg applies for EU membership
In a shock development following its breakaway from Antarctica, the giant iceberg has applied for membership of the EU.
A hastily formed government led by...
Greggs announce Paris as post Brexit Euro trading base and name change to De...
Food supremo Greggs announced via a Rochdale Herald exclusive today that they have chosen Paris for their post Brexit trading headquarters and will soon...
Prince Nuttall Awakens Britain’s Slumbering Populace With A Kiss
Joyful celebrations were heard throughout the Kingdom after it was confirmed that Prince Nuttall of UKIP had awakened Princess Populace with a kiss.
Handsome Prince...
Tory sparks by-election because… er…reasons.
Former non-dom tax shy billionaire's son and general Tory role model Zac Goldsmith has resigned from his position as a Tory MP after the...
Jeremy Corbyn found alive and well and working in B&Q
Jeremy Corbyn has been found alive and well and working in a branch of B&Q. The DIY store is well known for its positive...
Essex dog fears for future after hands-on meeting with Prime Minister
Essex - A black and white border collie from Sonning, Essex was reported to be safe in protective custody after being accosted by the...
Rochdale – Labour NEC “Can’t find its arse with both hands”
In the face of the least popular Tory Government since the Peterloo Massacre, Labour has decided not to bother being an opposition of any...
Whatever gave you the impression I will deal with student debt asks man who...
A man who distinctly said that he’d “deal with” student debt during an interview with the NME is curious to know why everybody was...
Leave means Leave says Boris Johnson’s Girlfriend
Boris Johnson's girlfriend has apparently told a befuddled Boris Johnson that leave means leave during a heated row at her flat in the early...
UKIP corruption proves EU corruption say UKIP
Documents leaked to Sky News showing that, should results be confirmed, UKIP have been misappropriating EU cash prove that the EU is dodgy, claimed...
Is Trump as well hung as May’s Parliament?
Hard on the heels of the revelation that President Donald Trump has fake Time Magazine covers hanging on the walls of his golf course...
David Davis and Liam Fox successfully negotiate paying full price for DFS sofa
Liam Fox and David Davis have been telling reporters how they were able to utilise their formidable negotiating skills to buy a new sofa...
Parliament summoned for cross party reshuffle
An emergency cross party parliamentary meeting has been organised for 1:00pm today to try and resolve our broken political system.
With the Tories fighting each...
