Corbyn train lie proves case for nationalisation
After it was revealed today that Jeremy Corbyn lied about having to sit on the floor of a train he claimed was ram packed,...
Postmen refuse to empty post boxes as ‘there could be anything in there’
Postmen across the country are refusing to open and empty letter boxes after being led to believe they could contain anything including bank robbers...
Only three UKIP leaders till Xmas
The election of the eleventh UKIP leader in the last calendar year has whipped the country into a frenzy of anticipation as it means...
Revealed! What ‘Brexit’ means.
After months of denying that 'Brexit' could be defined in terms of anything other than being 'Brexit', the Government has finally announced what, in...
Diane Abbot “fed lines through an ear-piece” says former leader
Diane Abbot's former Leader has claimed the MP is fed her lines through an earpiece so she doesn't have to memorise facts, figures, policy...
We’re not racist we want fewer white Polish faces too, Brexiters tell Vince...
Brexiters have taken umbrage at Vince Cable's suggestion that they'd like to see more white faces.
Cliff Edge, a red man who normally speaks in...
Slightly right leaning liberal centrist wishes everybody would just piss off
Slightly right leaning liberal centrists declared publicly today that they wish everybody would just piss off.
"I wish everybody would just piss off." Bob "Bobby"...
Happy Christmas to our Sovereign Parliament and readers
On behalf of the Daily Mail, we would like to wish all our readers a very Happy Christmas. Or if they don't celebrate Christmas,...
Jeremy Corbyn crowned 2016 House of Commons Hide and Seek Champion
Jeremy Corbyn has won this year's Parliamentary Hide and Seek championship, after only emerging after everyone had stopped looking.
“You’ve got to give the Morning...
Farron u-turns and joins coalition after McDonnell says he’ll let him sip his beer
"A coalition? No absolutely not we will not do it" said Tim Farron, earlier today at the Westminster bar.
However, moments later the Liberal Democrat...
Michael Gove is handsome and intelligent according to new YouGove poll.
A new poll by Britain's newest survey company has revealed that Michael Gove is both handsome and intelligent.
The new company, YouGove, polls members of...
Brexit Plan Turns Out To Be Just David Davis Bragging About His Massive Staff
The world waited with baited breath for David Davis' speech in which he was expected to reveal the government's plans for exiting the EU....
David Davis hospitalised after failing to negotiate his way out of wet paper bag
It is reported that every staff member on the exercise rapidly ripped a hole into the side of the giant, wet paper bag and emerged unscathed and rejuvenated, except David Davis, who seemed to struggle.
Conservative Christmas Party cancelled after failing to negotiate piss up deal with brewery
There was despair throughout the Conservative Party today after government officials announced that the annual Christmas do has been cancelled.
The news comes after many...
May dissolves Parliament and calls snap General Election
Theresa May has called a snap general election claiming that divisions at Westminster risked hampering the Brexit negotiations.
The Prime Minister will require the support...
Susan Boyle to sing Dead Kennedys ‘Too Drunk To F*ck’ at Trump Inauguration
In a last ditch attempt to find a "celebrity" to perform at Trump's Inauguration Scottish songstress and Britain's Got Talent sensation Susan Boyle (aka...
