Trump marks Martin Luther King weekend with burning cross on White House Lawn

3
US President elect, Donald Trump, will be hosting a tribute event for Martin Luther Day

Tommy Robinson claims full English ruined by brown sauce

67
Hate preacher Thomas “Tommy” Robinson (not his real name) has become terribly distraught at the presence of brown sauce in traditional English cafes. ...

Jimmy Young “Masterminded Thatcherism” says Released Documents

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In documents now only released after his death Jimmy Young has been revealed as the Mastermind behind the social & economic policies of Margaret Thatcher.

Tony Blair ego in critical condition after found clinging to Brexit controversy in Atlantic

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After being lost for several months following his exile from the UK, Tony Blair's ego has been found clinging desperately to a Brexit controversy...

Saint George will be denied entry visa under proposed post Brexit immigration rules

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Brexiters across the land were furious today with the news that proposed changes to immigration rules after Brexit make it highly likely Saint George...

Theresa May declares ‘sit down session’ with Trump a huge success

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British Prime Minister Theresa May Friday declared her "sit down meeting" with newly elected US President Donald Trump to have been "a roaring success". "He...

Government’s Brexit staff all writing “Trekking in Nepal” on CV’s

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Recruitment agencies report an influx of fresh CV's today all listing activity from late summer last year until today as "Trekking in Nepal". All the...
face palm

Hammond to read policy documents before saying them out loud in future

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Phillip Hammond, for now at least Chancellor of the Exchequer, has announced that in future he will "have a butchers at" major policy documents...
Pensioners

Remain camp optimistic about outcome of second referendum following forecasts of harsh winter

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Reports of a harsh winter allied with a fuel crisis has buoyed hopes of remaining part of the EC. Remain campaigner Frank Anwalther said "We...

Farron u-turns and joins coalition after McDonnell says he’ll let him sip his beer

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"A coalition? No absolutely not we will not do it" said Tim Farron, earlier today at the Westminster bar. However, moments later the Liberal Democrat...

Farage told get in the sea,  takes it literally

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Serial resigner and privately educated millionaire ex banker, Nigel Farage, self proclaimed 'man of the people' was told to "get in the sea" by...

May sets UK up for long March to Brexit

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Theresa May’s Conservative government have quite literally meddled with time in their pursuit of successfully completing Brexit according to their timetable. The Conservative party used their parliamentary...
Angry Man Shouting

Britain declares national state of Armagammon

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An emergency committee has confirmed that Britain faces an unprecedented state of 'Armagammon' today. One insider told us, "This is the highest state we could be...

Moody’s downgrade UK credit rating to junk status after realising who’s in charge

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It was announced this morning by a genuinely startled press that international rating agency Moody’s has downgraded the UK credit status to junk after...

People Telling Me I Shouldn’t Have Told Schoolgirl To F*ck Off Can F*ck Off...

4
The Conservative MP for Wells, James 'Compost' Heappey got all sweary when visiting the massively overpriced Millfield Academy for Young Toffs and Toffettes.  A Scottish...
Angry man, steam coming from ears

Stickupthearseitis

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A new disease, spread apparently by social media, is endangering the nation. Stickupthearseitis affects hundreds of people everyday and symptoms include getting salty over satire...

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