Warnings issued magic mushroom Brexit brexitius causes hallucinations of £350M week for NHS

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Health officials in the United Kingdom issued warnings today regarding the consumption of a new species of magic mushroom called ‘Brexit brexitius’ as consumers...

Britain First’s meme maker in coma

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As Poppy Day draws ever closer, the strain of making anti Muslim memes has proven to much for Britain First's head of social media, Tommy...

Government expands badger cull to five new areas despite warnings it doesn’t work

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We to need press on with the solution,  said Theressa May when questioned before all the MP's went on their jollies, leaving the...

Nigel Farage in eleventh hour bid for International Twat of the Year Award

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Nigel Farage has made an eleventh hour bid to snatch the "International Twat of the Year Award" from Donald Trump.
Theresa May

Theresa May to change name to Votey McVoteface to secure youth vote

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Prime Minister Theresa May will change her name to Votey McVoteface ahead of this Thursday's general election. With the election a matter of hours away...
Labour logo with Ukip logo within it

UKIP and Corbynista trolls to colour code social media posts to avoid confusion.

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  UKIP and the Corbynista wing of the Labour Party have reached a landmark agreement to prevent social media posts by their respective trolls and sock puppets...

Poldark overwhelming choice to lead Government of National Unity

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Popular TV star, the dark, brooding and enigmatic Ross Poldark has emerged as the main contender to lead a Government of National Unity as...

Heath department hails compulsory organ donation as possible way to pay for Brexit

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Sources inside the Department of Health this evening are said to be excited over the Secretary of State's alleged contribution to the debate about...

Rees-mogg to donate communion wafers to food banks to alleviate hunger with uplifting religious...

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Community pressure group VFAC (Vegan Food Advocates for Catholicism) have reacted with dismay today to news that Jacob Rees-mogg MP has donated one tonne...
Interrogation

Torture works say fictional super villains and Donald Trump

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Unnatural freaks, social outcasts and fictional horror characters are lining up to support President Trump's assertion that "torture works". "I've racked my brains to find...
Shouty man

‘Corporal punishment should be reinstated’ – people against Sharia law

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A recent survey of lobotomised knuckle dragging fuck nuggets revealed that they are fighting against the values that they themselves hold most dear. We caught...

Jeremy Corbyn rules out coalition with Labour MPs

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Jeremy Corbyn took the bold move today to rule out a coalition with SNP, The Greens, The Liberal Democrats and any of the politicians in The Labour Party. Talking to...

Labour to legalise Liam Fox hunting confirms Jeremy Corbyn

Labour has confirmed a new manifesto pledge today following the announcement by Theresa May to allow a free vote on reversing the 2004 fox...

I am truly above the law, confirms giant-toothed, flappy-eared, demon-eyed, shithouse, fuckmonger

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What’s your favourite type of monger? Picture him: Swooping down from the sky astride a yellowing American Eagle, the political shitehawk persuades his steed to loosen...
Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson feared dead?

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Rumours are rife today that the comical floppy haired Brexit buffoon Boris Johnson may have popped his clogs. It's been weeks now since he has...

Jeremy Corbyn found alive and well and working in B&Q

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Jeremy Corbyn has been found alive and well and working in a branch of B&Q. The DIY store is well known for its positive...

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