Argentina offers to invade Falklands Islands for £1B if that will help May?

89
A man claiming to represent Argentina has allegedly phoned the British prime minister and said for £1 billion they will pretend to invade the...

New UKIP leader elected yesterday already 3rd longest serving leader behind both Nigel Farages

7
Mr Henry Bolt-on was celebrating tonight after having managed the milestone event of third longest serving UKIP leader, even though he was only elected...

New Tony Blair character in Cluedo, cannot be accused

12
Exciting news for fans of the classic board game Cluedo as a new character is to be introduced! That character is no other than former...
Trump

Trump restores American faith in Bush

0
Donald Trump has today been credited with restoring America's faith in Bush. Dwayne Dwight of Alabama told the Herald "I was big into Bush in...

Trump in Mexican standoff

0
Donald Trump today paid a flying visit to Mexico for talks with President Pena Nieto.  Amongst his entourage was his new Foreign Policy adviser Jeremy...
Ski Trip

Momentum members take comfort from prospect of cheaper ski holidays

0
Whenever election results don't go as hoped, there is always a chance that the downhearted will become the outright depressed.  Fortunately, Momentum organiser Mia...

Universities to charge £4K a year for fruit picking courses to prepare students for...

38
In proposals aimed to meet the agricultural sector’s labour needs post Brexit universities will be allowed to charge up to £4K a year for...
Houses of Parliament

Lib Dems table bill to give each Leave voter bendy banana and note saying...

0
MPs are meeting this afternoon to discuss vital legislation that could break the Brexit deadlock and potentially save the Government. A bill tabled by Jo...

Pound hitting 8 year low nothing to do with Brexit Professor at University of...

0
Professor Cliff Edge has been quick out of the blocks today to reassure the public that the pound hitting an eight year low against...
Rees Mogg Farage

Massive bell end demands to hear massive bell end our EU relationship

11
Jacob Rees-moog is leading a rabble of conservative political bell ends drunk on Prosecco demanding to hear a big bell chime on the day...

Champion Shadow Cabinet Minister in U-turn U-turn

0
MP Sarah Champion, permed badger and former/current shadow Minister of Preventing Abuse and Changing One's Mind, unresigned today in what the Guardian and Owen...

Failed withdrawal expected to lead to painful Labour

0
Using the withdrawal method requires a high level of self-control.  Even then, the withdrawal method isn't especially effective. On the face of it (which is...
NewsThump

Rochdale IT Worker Deletes Human Rights Act

0
Albert Fudge, a Rochdale based web designer employed by the Conservative Party- has accidentally deleted the European Human Rights Act. The tech boffin was asked...

“Why does nobody believe me when I say I’m sorry?” asks woman with made...

0
A woman who made up a fictitious CV in order to secure a series of well paid jobs in The City is about to...

Government takes time off from covering up child abuse to tell people what kind...

0
The UK Government has taken time off from failing the victims of institutional child abuse and covering the tracks of high profile paedophiles to tell people what kind of pornography they're allowed to watch.

Neighbour dispute over building of boundary wall in garden 

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Two semidetached households in North Rochdale are currently amid one of the most notable disputes of recent years.  One of the neighbours, Don Trimple first...

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