Farage in critical condition after massive overdose
Nigel Farage is in a critical condition this morning after taking a colossal irony overdose.
Talking Turkey; Leadsom Embroiled In Referendum U-Turn Debacle
Conservative leadership candidate hopeful Andrea Leadsom was remaining tight lipped this morning following revelations that she has 'pulled a u-ey' over the recent referendum...
Shit sandwiches start to taste better after you have swallowed the first bite, David...
Following the Government's success in the Great Repeal Act, Brexit Secretary David Davies has moved to assure Parliament that the lingering taste of this...
Disastrous mistake warns stopping Brexit would be disastrous mistake
A disastrous mistake will warn derailing Brexit will be a disastrous mistake in a speech about a falling over in public later today.
In a...
Boris “getting Coronavirus done”. PM tests positive.
The Rochdale Herald can confirm that the Prime Minister of the UK, Boris Johnson, has tested positive for Coronavirus.
Having been tested for Coronavirus on...
Matt Hancock adds Straw Clutching to his cv as “transferable skill”
Hot on the heels of Boris Johnson's success in the Stable Door Shutting championships, the Health Secratary, Matt Hancock has added Straw Clutching to...
Irony pronounced dead after UKIP spokesman warns Corbyn Government would ‘take Britain back to...
Experts have announced that irony is dead. The announcement came after a UKIP MEP said that Britain would be plunged back to the early...
Sacha Baron-Cohen amazed no one has seen through his Jeremy Corbyn character
Sacha Baron-Cohen has expressed amazement that no one has twigged that he is the man behind the character 'Jeremy Corbyn'.
"I wanted to play with...
Doctors find hating immigrants can increase risk of getting Nuttalls
Recent medical studies have found a direct link between xenophobic thoughts and the rampant outbreak of Nuttalls in the U.K.
Closely resembling a haemorrhoid, a...
Scientists admit Rees-Mogg is experiment to create the perfect twat
There was mild surprise today, as the lid was blown off a secret program revealing that Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg was the product of...
Passports to be made in France as British firm De La Rue ruled out...
Home Office confirms Franco-Dutch firm Gemalto will make Bleu passports.
Controversy struck the UK this week after a mix up at the Home Office led...
Voters must provide family coat of arms as ID insists government
The government has been accused of the suppression of voters' rights after plans to introduce compulsory checks of a family coat of arms for...
Communists Confused by Billy No Mates
The Far left have found themselves even more confused than normal today after revelations from losing Labour leadership candidate Owen Smith.
The Leninist/Trotskyist group of...
Symbolic figurehead has dinner with elected European leaders
The symbolic figurehead of the United Kingdom, Theresa May, dined last night with the twenty seven elected heads of the European Union.
Ms May was...
Sending emails much worse than raping children Trump tells supporters
Donald Trump told supporters at a rally today that accusations that Hillary Clinton mishandled emails during her tenure as Secretary of State were much...
Whitehaven and Cumbria to Leave UK Launch of Cumbria Independence Party CUMFUK
Emboldened by her landslide victory in the Copeland By-Election, new MP Trudy Harrison has announced that she is leaving the Conservative Party to campaign...
