Labour less popular than Conservatives snap poll reveals
Labour voters up and down the country were dismayed to learn that, according to a poll of absolutely everybody with a vote in the...
Sturgeon triggers IndyRef 2 after house lands on sister
Nicola Sturgeon sensationally called for an independence referendum after a house came seemingly from nowhere and landed on her sister.
Speaking through an interpreter she...
Dianne Abbot ‘can count on all 12 fingers’ times the biased media have tried...
After an embarrassing spate of catastrophic interviews, Dianne Abbot has complained that radio and television hosts are now deliberately and maliciously trying to confuse her.
In...
EU to force UK to use £ s d following Brexit…
Brussels has warned that Britain will no longer be allowed to use the decimal system following Brexit and will be forced to go back...
Lord Voldemort refuses to compare himself to any character in The Conservative Party
Lord Voldemort was visiting Hogwarts School today and was asked whether he was a fan of the Conservative Party by a student during a Q & A session in the Slytherin common room.
Doctors find hating immigrants can increase risk of getting Nuttalls
Recent medical studies have found a direct link between xenophobic thoughts and the rampant outbreak of Nuttalls in the U.K.
Closely resembling a haemorrhoid, a...
The Queen asks Merkel to form a government
Her Majesty the Queen is expected to travel to Berlin later today to ask German Chancellor Angela Merkel to form a government for the...
Trump enlists Gary Glitter to play inauguration
There are reports that Donald Trump is struggling to find top acts to perform or present at his inaugural event.
The demagogue was able to...
Momentum release Labour leader themed children’s book ‘Where’s Corbyn?’
Children of the proletariat were delighted at the news today that Momentum are publishing a series of exciting Labour leader themed children's books.
The first...
Ukip furious at voting for ‘the wrong Hitler’ in leadership election
UKIP are in disarray today after 'accidentally' electing Eddie Hitler to lead them for a month before Nigel Farage decides he wants the job again.
Ray...
Don’t vote for a chaotic Brexit, says cause of chaotic Brexit
Loose cannon David Davis describes the scattergun approach to Brexit as "regrettable". The strident anti-EU campaigner wants the UK to cut the European cord,...
Jeremy Corbyn’s children still enjoying playing with their new coal
Jeremy Corbyn’s children reportedly had a brilliant Christmas and are still enjoying playing with the new coal their Dad bought them.
Patriotic Brexiteer spends £60M on Singapore homes after saving £60M in UK Corporation Tax
Patriotic billionaire Brexiteer, Singapore resident and tax exile James Dyson has just bought a £26M bungalow in Singapore weeks after buying a Penthouse in...
John McDonnell caught on film pushing Diane Abbott under bus while out jogging
John McDonell has been embroiled in a bizarre cover up involving himself and Diane Abbot
Labour manifesto to revolutionise politics by getting rid of the Labour party
The Labour Party has revealed a manifesto that will revolutionise British politics by getting rid of the Labour Party.
Speaking to the Herald a spokesman...
Clocks won’t go back this month due to EU ruling
The European Union and the UK Government have agreed that the UK's clocks won't go back an hour in October this year or change...
