Prime Minister not taking donations from millionaires for granted
The Tory spin doctors are especially busy this morning on the nation's airwaves ensuring everybody they are not taking yesterday's electoral results as a...
Conservatives to shoot badgers until Henry VIII powers allow them to hunt with dogs...
Conservative MP George Eustice was allegedly out celebrating at a champagne breakfast this morning after deciding to kill a lot more badgers in order...
Corbyn manifesto pledge to roll Tom Watson in carpet and throw into the sea...
Jeremy Corbyn's manifesto pledge to have Tom Watson rolled up in a carpet, beaten with broken pool cues and thrown off Southend Pier at...
U.S. prepares for Steve Bannon’s execution
Following an interview in which Steve Bannon compared himself to Tudor-era royal adviser Thomas Cromwell, America is making hasty preparations for the execution of Donald...
Sending emails much worse than raping children Trump tells supporters
Donald Trump told supporters at a rally today that accusations that Hillary Clinton mishandled emails during her tenure as Secretary of State were much...
Corbyn Calls for Alton Towers to be Nationalised as Queues for Rollercoaster hits 2...
Waiting for hours for the hope of a seat, crushed up against other in the park, or crouched uncomfortably in the queues is an...
What time is it Mr Woolfe?
Steven Woolfe, a total barrister who serves as a legal adviser to hedge fund managers and bankers narrowly missed his chance to become replacement...
Lib Dems table bill to give each Leave voter bendy banana and note saying...
MPs are meeting this afternoon to discuss vital legislation that could break the Brexit deadlock and potentially save the Government.
A bill tabled by Jo...
Talking Turkey; Leadsom Embroiled In Referendum U-Turn Debacle
Conservative leadership candidate hopeful Andrea Leadsom was remaining tight lipped this morning following revelations that she has 'pulled a u-ey' over the recent referendum...
New UKIP leader had hypnotherapy to stop him saying “I”m not a racist, but”...
UKIP’s press officer Ms Gline Garafe reassured a nervous nation today by stating that UKIP’s new leader has undergone hypnotherapy to stop him saying...
Government votes to go on holiday early after solving all UK’s problems
Members of parliament have overwhelmingly voted to bring their summer break forward as a reward for having solved all of the UK's problems.
The...
People in Shock as Cameron steps down as MP because nobody knew he was...
Ex Prime Minister David Cameron has today announced he will quit his role as an MP, which has surprised almost everybody as we'd all...
David Davis replaced as Brexit negotiator by two short planks
The government announced this morning that Chief Brexit negotiator David Davis is to be replaced by two short planks.
It's believed the replacement of Mr....
Trump Press Secretary buys fireproof underpants
The secret of Press Secretary Sean Spicer's propensity for hyperbolic bullshitacity has been revealed.
He has reportedly been wearing a revolutionary new type of asbestos...
John McDonnell caught on film pushing Diane Abbott under bus while out jogging
John McDonell has been embroiled in a bizarre cover up involving himself and Diane Abbot
High Court allows Royal Prerogative to execute Daily Mail editor for treason
In a bold move the UK judiciary has ruled to suspend Parliamentary Sovereignty to allow the UK Government to use the Royal Prerogative to round up and chop the heads off the editors of The Daily Mail, The Daily Express and The Sun.
