EU

EU condemns punchy politics

0
After events today the EU has made an announcement about violent behaviour. Guy Verhofstadt, famous both for having a mouth like a vending machine and...
Nice Nurse Senior Patient

Medical advances mean some students might survive long enough to pay back debts PM...

5
The woman pretending to be British Prime Minister is expected to increase her appeal to the younger demographics today. She will do it by...
Corbyn Elbow Patches

Jeremy Corbyn wins coveted Empty Suit award

0
Jeremy Corbyn has been awarded the prestigious Empty Suit award. The ceremony took place in London last night and as tradition dictates Mr Corbyn wasn't...
Ladder

Trump’s view on border wall evolves after learning the word ‘ladder’

8
Donald Trump has sensationally dropped his controversial border wall plan, a key election promise, after seeing one of his Mexican labourers use a ladder for the first time.
Theresa May

Theresa May refuses to attend the General Election

0
After appointing her recently bereaved Home Secretary, Amber Rudd, to take flack from 'the most left wing audience since a Stalin rally' - Daily Mail, in...
Tesco Express

Lib Dem election breakthrough as Tim Farron recognised in Tesco Express

The Liberal Democrats are said to be heartened by the progress they've made in this election campaign after reports that a member of the...

London sewer found clogged with dreams of the young after government flushes future down...

17
Sewer workers in the London area of Whitechapel have reportedly found the dreams of the young decomposing in a giant blockage in the system...

Boris Upsets Sturgeon Over Calls for New Indyref

0
Boris Johnson today ran into further hot water, or perhaps hot oil, over comments responding to Nicola Sturgeon's view that only an Independent Scotland...

Lib Dems form armed wing in desperate bid to remain relevant

0
The Liberal Democrats have announced the creation of an ‘armed wing’ in what commentators are interpreting as a last ditch attempt to have some...

Rochdale PR firms enters FTSE 250 after winning Simon Danczuk crisis management contract

0
There was jubilation in Rochdale this afternoon as Clifford Savile Associates PLC announced their entry into the FTSE 250 for the first time. The news...
Wetherspoons

Brexiteers to die of cirrhosis 20% sooner thanks to Wetherspoons

0
Price cuts on just before date-expired cask ale and fizzy lager mean that Wetherspoons customers will be able to drink themselves to death more...

Monster Raving Looney Party rejects Douglas Carswell for being TOO weird

0
Having survived a terror attack last Thursday the British parliament has been delivered another shock with the news that the Official Monster Raving Loony...
Jeremy Corbyn

Commie Corbyn pledges to nationalise your teeth

0
Bearded Trotskyite do-gooder, Jeremy Corbyn has taken a break from sending care packages full of homemade jam to terrorists, to nationalise absolutely everything. Clueless commie...
Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson sneezes and accidentally appeals for 32 British people to be stoned to...

0
Boris Johnson has apologised for his "sneeze" during comments about a bus full of British women on holiday in Saudi Arabia. The foreign secretary said...
Pork Scratchings

Relief as far-right mob turns out to be burst bag of pork scratchings

0
Police have attended an incident in Rochdale today after numerous concerned calls reported a far-right mob assembled in the town centre. Attending officers would like...

Leadsom’s Children ‘Huge Drain’ On The NHS, Blast Critics

0
A new campaign has surfaced drawing attention to hyper-fertile Tory leadership hopeful Andrea Leadsom's penchant for bulking the national populace. Stop Leadsom Over Breeding for...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts