Other News

Hate preacher Thomas “Tommy” Robinson (not his real name) has become terribly distraught at the presence of brown sauce in traditional English cafes. Eating a traditional Full English breakfast near the scene of...

Mime artists across the world are silently applauding the first ever recorded occurrence of a mime artist breaking out of a glass box. There was nearly a breakout in 1987 when Chico the twat had...

Middle class first time buyers are up in arms over house prices this week as the housing market continued to slow while the price of beautiful, conveniently located luxury homes continues to rise. "It's ridiculous."...

Rumours are rife today that the comical floppy haired Brexit buffoon Boris Johnson may have popped his clogs. It's been weeks now since he has been seen either knocking a defenceless child to the floor,...

Whenever election results don't go as hoped, there is always a chance that the downhearted will become the outright depressed.  Fortunately, Momentum organiser Mia Miah has managed to see the bright side. "Clearly, I am...

Independent research carried out by a team of so-called "experts" has backed up a comment made by the Brexit Secretary today. David "What Am I Doing?" Davis reassured the public that a post-Brexit Britain will...

Dad's Army Star Clive Dunn has apologised after being pictured wearing a Nazi uniform. The Sun on Sunday published pictures of the celebrity actor and one time pop-star in a World War Two outfit, including...

In a miraculous change of heart Rochdale Online has decided to give the suspended MP Simon Danczuk a break. Editor Sandra Simonhater said "He did nowt wrong today" instead opting to report on Rochdale...

Brenda "Brenda" Williamson, a Rochdale woman shortlisted for the UK Curling team but ultimately dropped from the squad, today broke ranks and claimed that Curling and some other winter sports were not really sports...

Have you recently felt the need to visit the newly opened Craft beer bar up the street? Have you been annoyed at your local café for not knowing what a flat white was? Or maybe you’re...

Following an altercation in Strasbourg yesterday between two fully grown adult men, Mike Hookem and Steven Wolfe, UKIP released a statement saying;

In a bid to appear more accessible to young people the Conservative party have updated the image of some of their more prominent MPs. The aim is to change public opinion; to be seen as...

The people of the United Kingdom took a collective gasp today, Wednesday 1st of April, as Boris Johnson announced he would be stepping down. "This morning," the Prime Minister announced from self isolation inside number...

Jeremy Corbyn has pledged to support the Conservative Party's promise to repeal the fox hunting ban. This appears to be the result of him mishearing "hunting" and believing they are intent on repealing a ban...

Cat-owners are now being asked to count any rodents or birds left on their doorstep as declarable earnings in their application for means-tested benefits, according to government sources. The latest guidelines issued to employees of...

28.2E Astra2/Eurobird1 may not mean anything to most people, but it is very much in the minds of worried Rochdale residents who have recently learned that the high-tech TV satellite is expected to fall...