Home Office Secretary Amber Rudd has issued a timely reminder to foreign words today that they will no longer be allowed to enter the ENGLISH LANGUAGE from the end of March 2019.

April fool’s day 2019 is the expected date of British liberation from the tyrannical trade bloc across the channel that is so insane it lets a country leave if enough of their people vote to do so, regardless of how many lies are used in the campaign to do so.

The reminder was given after the Finnish word ‘felch’ was found loitering about on entertainment sites frequented by MPs while on their summer recess.

It’s feared this is just the tip of the iceberg as European words try and shoehorn their way onto our pure tongue before the date of Brexit.

Foreign words already resident in the native tongue, like Welsh ones, will be allowed to remain after England (and the others) exit the EU, but only if they are able to find a trustworthy sponsor willing to guarantee they won’t attempt to form new compound words with patriotic indigenous words.

Asked what the implications of this would be on English words already resident in other languages on the continent, the Home Secretary was less certain.

“We haven’t looked into that yet. But I’m sure no European head of state would try and use ex-pat English words as bargaining chips when we are being so reasonable about letting all those invading German and French and Dutch and Italian and Spanish and oh, Norse? words stay, so long as they’ve been here for more than five years and have a lot of money.”

Chief Cultural Reviser, Saint George, appointed by the Home Office to oversee the protection of English after liberation from cross channel cultures, had something to say on the subject, but it was all in an archaic Syrian Turkish Palestinian tongue and no one from the government was able to translate.