Mr Tumble denounces Theresa May and says not in our name.
Leading clowns have issued a joint statement confirming that Theresa May's latest attacks on migrants and the NHS are not part of traditional clown teaching.
The statement went on to point out that, although she...
Crystal Maze to return as literally no ideas left
The Crystal Maze is set to return our screens, again;
"The barrel has no bottom. There's nothing left to scrape anymore. This is it." Said a distraught Paul Whittle, a Channel 4 veteran Producer with...
Berlin enjoys best U2 gig in years as Bono loses his voice
It's being dubbed as the greatest U2 concert ever by people who bought tickets but can't work out why.
U2 played Berlin last night and had the audience in raptures as the show was ended...
Owen Smith calls for another vote on leadership challenge
In a statement the bespectacled Bilko impersonator said;
"Just like on the issue of Europe, many people wanted a different outcome. I'd be prepared to campaign again for that outcome, for a stronger Labour party...
Mixed Reviews for Brexit Easter Eggs
The government’s official Brexit Easter Eggs have been flying off the shelves this week but many consumers have been left disappointed.
Betty Roffin of Rochdale was one of many demanding a refund, stating “I bought...
British Public shocked to learn Pizza and San Miguel not Mediterranean Diet
Rochdalians are being reminded today that having a deep pan 16 inch spicy meat special doesn't count as following a Mediterranean diet- even if you've preceded it with 12 bottles of San Miguel.
The reminder...
NHS admit to clicking ‘remind me later’ on McAfee update for seven years straight
NHS digital has come under fire from computer security professionals; as an investigation into yesterday's Malware virus has revealed NHS used McAfee and hadn't updated it in seven years.
"Honestly, bloody McAfee?" Said digital security expert Mike...
Amazon to train Animals to deliver your parcels
The world's largest internet retailer, and tax avoiding giant, Amazon are rumored to be conducting secret trials using animals to deliver parcels to your doorstep.
An inside source has told The Rochdale Herald that all...
Bolton Distances Itself From Bolton
The town of Bolton has decided to release a strongly worded on letter to the press following the election of Mr Henry Bolton as the new leader of the UK Independence party.
In the...
Liberal Metropolitan Elite plan to rig election goes awry when Hermes deliver rubbers to...
The Liberal Metropolitan Elite was reeling last night when a delivery of 2 million rubbers was delivered to the wrong address.
The Elite were allegedly planning to fix the upcoming UK General Election by inserting agents in...
The Beckhams ditch L.A for glorious Rochdale
Today the Herald can exclusively reveal the jaw dropping news that the world's biggest star, glamour model, fashion icon, tireless charity worker and one of the finest footballers of his generation David Beckham (and...
Historians will look back at 2016 as a major catalyst. They won’t remember celebrity...
Whilst you were all distracted with American politics and the ins and outs of Article 50 being triggered, the government has passed the controversial snoopers charter into law, now called The Investigatory Powers Act.
Edward...
People with personalised number plates are knobs, according to latest research
Antisocial anthropologist Dr Alec Smartt revealed this astounding fact in his dissertation entitled "Discerning the class differentials in a post-modern classless society".
Dr Smartt's research focussed particularly upon successful people who have mysteriously risen...
UKIP Neighbour in Festive Twat Fiasco
A member of UKIP has made the news after showing the good old, British, Christian spirit: he's built a large billboard to piss off his neighbours.
Tim “Dim but dim” McBrillo, a god-fearing, Nigel Faragophile...
Kent Experiencing Building Boom
Leaked document reveals the Government has begun a refit of four derelict seaside hotels in Kent for use as internment camps housing dissenters during Brexit negotiations.
Camps are to be codenamed "Grauniad", "Mirror", "Rochdale...
Surprise as West Ham Fan runs 50 yards on pitch without stopping for fag...
It has been crowned the greatest sporting achievement at the London Stadium since the 2012 Olympics.
There was shock and surprise as a West Ham United fan ran 50 yards on the London Stadium pitch,...
