All w**ds to be b*nned to avoid offending p***ks
All words and language in all forms and formats are to be banned from next week for all eternity.
The reason for the multi-party agreed...
Charlie Brooker commits suicide whilst writing his 2016 Wipe
The much loved satirist repeatedly smashed his face into his own coffee table whilst reading through a draft of his hugely anticipated show.
In the...
Daily Mail reveal United Airlines assault victim once had an overdue library book
It has been revealed today that Dr David Dao, the passenger on a United Airlines flight who was beaten for sitting in a seat...
Sign up to The Rochdale Herald Newsletter
The technical gods at The Rochdale Herald have built a very special daily newsletter that goes out every day at 5pm by email.
If you...
Editor of satirical Newspaper “not convinced” readers know what satire means
The editor of a satirical newspaper was reported to have his head in his hands after 60,000 people read an article he'd written about...
Crystal Maze to return as literally no ideas left
The Crystal Maze is set to return our screens, again;
"The barrel has no bottom. There's nothing left to scrape anymore. This is it." Said...
The Sun wins top spot in nationwide industry poll
Following recent scandals involving their journalists, inaccurate reporting and misinforming large sections of the population The Sun newspaper has had some positive feedback from...
Men applaud new Gillette advert that features man carving his initials into girlfriends face...
A new advert for Gillette razors has been lauded by Piers Morgan as, "way better than all that social justice bollocks".
Piers and many other...
Daily Mail Readers confused more toddlers haven’t walked alone to UK from Syria
Daily Mail Readers are confused more toddlers haven't walked the 2,000 miles to Calais from Syria.
Keith Vaz to chair Parliamentary Select Committee for online porn regulation
News is reaching us from the House of Commons that Keith Vaz has been selected to chair the online porn regulation select committee.
It is thought he...
Goebbels didn’t like satire either – satirists tell Zuckerberg
As the entire world struggles to unravel themselves from their twisted knickers following the surprise election of a sexist satsuma to the Whitehouse satirists have come under fire from Google and Facebook for writing fake news, otherwise known as fiction.
Accusations of Racism Hit John Lewis Commercial
The new John Lewis advert, featuring a black British family giving their daughter a trampoline for Christmas has been denounced as racist.
"It's an...
BBC resolves gender pay gap crisis
Human Resources managers at the BBC have been working tirelessly throughout the weekend, completing two days of back-to-back 6 hour shifts with reduced ginseng...
Woman wins “I’ve got no self respect, get me out of here!”
A woman called Scarlett Moffat, who you've probably never heard of or will again, has won the annual competition to see just how far...
‘Child on hospital floor’ journalist joins the Rochdale Herald’s staff
The Rochdale Herald is proud to announce the appointment of surely-ex-by-now Telegraph columnist Allison Pearson to our staff.
"Our quest for people who can spout...
Sex Workers to sue Daily Mail for comparing them to Melania Trump
Millions of sex workers are suing right wing rag, The Daily Mail, after they referred to Melania Trump as a "former sex worker" in...
