Billy Bush reinstated after “Today” apologises to him

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Billy Bush is to return to the Today programme after receiving a grovelling apology from the network owners.  They have also sacked the producers and...

Britain celebrates start of 40 days of losing its mind about Easter eggs

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Britain has been celebrating the start of its traditional Lent activity of being outraged about Easter Eggs not saying Easter on them. Father Frederick Seddon...

Piers Morgan distraught after accidentally flushing article down the bog

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He'd just logged on Vox populi Piers Morgan (yeah I used Latin, deal with it, what comic do you think you're reading, the Mail?) has...

BBC resolves gender pay gap crisis

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Human Resources managers at the BBC have been working tirelessly throughout the weekend, completing two days of back-to-back 6 hour shifts with reduced ginseng...
Alf Garnett

Love Thy Neighbour and Till Death do us Part set to get reboots.

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The BBC and ITV have both announced this week that they intend reviving certain 'classic' 70's sitcoms because of the current fashion for being...

Local Liberal Claims To Only Visit Daily Mail Website For The Tits And Ass

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Rochdale liberal Gerard Sutherland has told his wife that he only visits the Daily Mail website for the Z-list 'celebrity' tits and ass, and...

Princess Diana’s ghost gives Express readers advice on how to deal with slippery driving...

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The ghost of Diana, Thingy of Wales, has been giving Daily Express readers advice on how to survive the cold weather. Speaking through a medium,...

Nobody knows what that Facebook fisher is going on about

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It was revealed today that nobody knows what that friend who keeps posting attention seeking statuses is actually on about.

Greta Thunberg named Time’s Person of the Year for stopping Coldplay touring

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Greta Thunberg has won Time magazine's Person of the Year for her work in stopping Coldplay from touring. Thunberg said, "All of my life there...

Satirists face existential crisis

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Satirists around the world face extinction due to rising stupidity levels and utter fucking idiocy. "How am I supposed to write satire about this, there's...

New York Times Reported to the House Committee for Un-American Activities

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The New York Times, long considered to be the lap-dog mouthpiece of the Commie-loving East-coast foreigner, has finally (and thankfully) been reported to the...

The Herald Headline Review: Today’s Sunday paper headlines in one easy read

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The Sun on Sunday leads with a report that Jeremy Corbyn was seen at the same hotel as someone vaguely related to someone who...

Let’s Get Ready to TUMBLE!

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Things just got real in the editorial bunker at The Rochdale Herald after those soft southern satirist impersonators at The Southend News Network went...

Daily Mail readers die from apoplexy after Muslim Immigrant wins Gold

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Lord Rothermere is expected to file for bankruptcy on Monday after the last of his Daily Mail readers died of apoplexy following the 10,000m...

Microsoft worker takes Apple to court

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Yesterday, a Microsoft employee allegedly got a dressing down from High Court judge, the Right Honorable Justice Antony Smyth-Tomkinson. The employee who we cannot...

Crystal Maze to return as literally no ideas left

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The Crystal Maze is set to return our screens, again; "The barrel has no bottom. There's nothing left to scrape anymore. This is it." Said...

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