Scientists prove dementia risk reduced by not reading The Sun

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Scientists at the Rochdale Institute for Cerebral Health have released the results of a long running study into dementia and how not reading The...

Herald Editor Treated For Shock After Finding Journalism in Daily Mirror

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The Editor of the Rochdale Herald is recuperating in Rochdale General Hospital after accidentally finding some quality journalism in The Daily Mirror.
Musician

2016 maintains the Status Quo

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2016 has been everybody's annus horibilis, and it is with great regret that we announce the death of Status Quo legend Rick Parfitt. Having survived...

Muslims damage white man’s van outside mosque, screams Daily Mail

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Allegedly Paul Dacre rang round every Daily Mail journalist to ensure The Daily Mail created the appropriate coverage of the terrorist incident in Finsbury. Simply...

Goebbels didn’t like satire either – satirists tell Zuckerberg

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As the entire world struggles to unravel themselves from their twisted knickers following the surprise election of a sexist satsuma to the Whitehouse satirists have come under fire from Google and Facebook for writing fake news, otherwise known as fiction.

Daily Mail and Newthump one and the same?

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Rumours are riff in the cut throat world of satire that just like Michael and Latoya Jackson were almost definitely the same person the...

Telegraph journalist executes her integrity with call to murder politician

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Sane people all over the country were horrified, but largely unsurprised, that right-wing publication the Daily Telegraph had called for a political leader...
Angry man

People who say Nazis were socialists to lose human status

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The UN has today confirmed that anyone who says Nazis were socialist are to lose human status, joining holocaust deniers in the shortlist of...
Daily Mail Readers

Daily Mail outrage as child placed with Muslim foster parents not with Christian child...

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The Daily Mail and its readers have reacted with fury after a child was placed with a Muslim foster family due to a lack...

New Beer Campaign Branded ‘Tasteless’

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The British Council For Drinking More Beer (BCFDMB) rolled out their latest advertising initiative, a series of billboard posters to be prominently displayed in...

Southern Rail Timetable wins Man Booker Prize for fiction

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The visionary author of Southern Rail's timetable, Bernard Jones, has been announced as the seventh winner of the Man Booker International Prize for fiction. The...
Angry man, steam coming from ears

Newspaper sellers to take precautions.

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Newsagents and shops where papers are sold all over the UK are being urged by the Health and Safety Executive to take extra precautions...
Piers Morgan

Piers Morgan caught rummaging through bins looking for the smirk that’s been wiped off...

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Voice mail enthusiast and professional shit stirrer, Piers Morgan, has been spotted scouring the bins behind a Lidl in Hammersmith. The toe faced smarm slinger...

Daily Mail editor accused of Crocodile Tears following Polish migrant murder

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The editor of poisonous bog roll manufacturer, The Daily Mail, was accused of shedding crocodile tears by The Rochdale Herald after a Polish man...

Greta Thunberg named Time’s Person of the Year for stopping Coldplay touring

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Greta Thunberg has won Time magazine's Person of the Year for her work in stopping Coldplay from touring. Thunberg said, "All of my life there...

Satirists face existential crisis

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Satirists around the world face extinction due to rising stupidity levels and utter fucking idiocy. "How am I supposed to write satire about this, there's...

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