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The technical gods at The Rochdale Herald have built a very special daily newsletter that goes out every day at 5pm by email. If you...

Rochdale Herald editor drowns in tragic Daily Mail tractor accident

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In an incident uncannily similar to the fate of controversial media proprietor, Robert Maxwell, who apparently drowned after falling from his private yacht, an...

Assange ready to be extradited from his own arse

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Julian Assange has confirmed that he is willing to be extradited from his own arse following Barack Obama’s decision to commute the sentence of US Army...

Brian Cox apologises for insisting Things Can Only Get Better

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Astrologer to the stars Professor Brian Cox has finally come clean about his greatest fib told way back in 1993.

Reality blamed for increase of violence on television

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Recent studies by a team at Oxford University have found potential links between reality and the increasing portrayal of graphic violence on TV. Many of...

Charlie Brooker commits suicide whilst writing his 2016 Wipe

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The much loved satirist repeatedly smashed his face into his own coffee table whilst reading through a draft of his hugely anticipated show. In the...
Broadcast

BBC Radio 2 breakfast show ratings soar, as listeners want their bloody money’s worth

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As the dust starts to settle on Terry Wogan's grave after being disturbed so much by him spinning in it, the Rochdale Herald can...

Nobody Offended By Twitter Joke

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A joke posted on Twitter yesterday has met with a complete lack of offence for the first time in history. The joke which reads "Most...

Liberal elite should stop bullying Stalin says Daily Mail

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The Daily Mail has instructed its readers to avoid the film, The Death of Stalin. In an editorial piece the Mail said, "This film...
Man laughing

Serious satirists no laughing matter

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150-times winner of the 12-monthly Rochdale Herald annual 'Best satirical news site, based in Rochdale', the Rochdale Herald, has recently left readers puzzled.   It...

BBC Resolves Gender Pay Gap Crisis

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Human Resources managers at the BBC have worked tirelessly throughout the weekend (completing two days of back-to-back 6 hour shifts with reduced ginseng tea...
Teenage Boys

I love the idea of age verification to watch porn, said no teen ever

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The Rochdale Herald held an exclusive poll earlier today to find out the public's reaction on whether or not they should have to got...
Noel Edmunds

Channel 4 axes Deal Or No Deal after contestant cracks formula

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Channel 4's flagship box-based quiz show "Deal Or No Deal" is to be axed after Rochdale maths wizard Ken Ramsbottom cracked the code that's...
Attenborough

BBC to put Sir David Attenborough in a ‘stasis chamber’

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The specialist chamber housing Sir David Attenborough was created by NASA for long haul space travel and would have allowed Astronauts to be put...

Putin Accused in Rogue One Plan Hack Report

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Emperor Palpatine has sensationally accused Russia of interfering in the internal affairs of the Galactic Empire. He has warned that the Empire will retaliate for...
Angry man

People who say Nazis were socialists to lose human status

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The UN has today confirmed that anyone who says Nazis were socialist are to lose human status, joining holocaust deniers in the shortlist of...

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